Here i am gonna discuss a matter that one of my good friends is facing now a days.
she is a bold and confident girl. she is at home in internet and cell phone. she is studying in an institute where the girls and boys study together. she have many internet friends both male and female and is never shy to talk to any male around her. but she never had any affair. i mean she is a person who never let anyone come close to her. she had friends who are boys but no boyfriend. a few months back she met a man on internet and as the time passed both of them felt that they like each other. both expressed their feelings.
now the girls is head over heels in love with him. the guy also says that she is a perfect choice to get married with. but suddenly he raised a question that how its possible that she hadn’t have any relationship. a girl who is fully free to do anything how its possible that she never had any affair. he says that he doesn’t doubt her character but its the question that is perplexing him. he needs a satisfactory answer. but the girl doesn’t know how can she satisfy his question.
she doesn’t want breakup. she says no matter he marries me or not but i want to answer this question.
what should she do?
I don't think she should have to explain herself. If the guy claims to like her enough to marry her, he shouldn't obsess about her past and quit being anal about it.
thats what all i said to my friend. but she is in a fix. she now, may be due to her ego, wants to clear this matter.
she loves him but saying that she doesn't care he marries her or not. but she wants to give an satisfactory answer.
Find another gentleman who does not pose this question and is a real gentleman who does not give heartache to one he loves.
Love does not care if you had an affair previously or not. If you have one eye or four , if you have one leg , missing both. They both are not in love it is called infatuation is teen agers go through it a lot. This phase will be over soon and they both will find that their true love.
thats what all i said to my friend. but she is in a fix. she now, may be due to her ego, wants to clear this matter.
she loves him but saying that she doesn't care he marries her or not. but she wants to give an satisfactory answer.
is there any way to solve this problem?
Why does she feel the need to answer? Is she insecure about herself? Does she have daddy issues? lol.
hmmm i agree...i don't know why girls always have to suffer...if they were in any relationship it causes trouble for them and if they weren't its also a question mark for them that why didn't they have any....
Here i am gonna discuss a matter that one of my good friends is facing now a days.
she is a bold and confident girl. she is at home in internet and cell phone. she is studying in an institute where the girls and boys study together. she have many internet friends both male and female and is never shy to talk to any male around her. but she never had any affair. i mean she is a person who never let anyone come close to her. she had friends who are boys but no boyfriend. a few months back she met a man on internet and as the time passed both of them felt that they like each other. both expressed their feelings.
now the girls is head over heels in love with him. the guy also says that she is a perfect choice to get married with. but suddenly he raised a question that how its possible that she hadn't have any relationship. a girl who is fully free to do anything how its possible that she never had any affair. he says that he doesn't doubt her character but its the question that is perplexing him. he needs a satisfactory answer. but the girl doesn't know how can she satisfy his question.
she doesn't want breakup. she says no matter he marries me or not but i want to answer this question.
what should she do?
ofcourse he's doubting her caracter! and what the hell does the red marked frase mean... he's being diplomatic.its obvious..
How come he is asking her this now? Is this something that wasnt discussed before? How long have they been in touch with eachother and has she seen/met him in real?
When he asked her this, in what way was this? in an accusing way, eventhough he says he does not doubt her...
She can explain all she wants. I would only answer him to set him straight! and not to satisfy him. This is something programmed in a lot (desi) guys minds, there is no cure..
You can tell him that you were never in a relationship before because you hadn't come across anyone that you found either remotely interesting or compatible...and that you were also concentrating more on other things in your life (education, work, etc). If these are the reasons why your friend was never in a relationship (and they make sense, nothing unusual about them)....then she can tell him that. She can also tell him that not every person uses their "freedom" and "time" in the same way.
This is an Internet relationship. And when you're not interacting face-to-face....it's hard to determine someone's tone and intentions behind their questions and comments. It could be that the guy doubts her character....BUT.....it is also possible that he's simply curious. And the reasons for that curiosity might be that most of the girls he knows in his life have been in relationships and he thinks that it's easier for desi girls to have relationships these days especially if the family is not that strict. He might even be wondering because he thinks that your friend is such an awesome girl with a great personality that it's hard for him to think that guys would not be attracted to her or pursue her or that she wasn't in a previous relationship.
If she likes the guy this much...then answer his question with confidence. And if he STILL doesn't believe her....and if he goes as far as doubting her character..................then she needs to move on and find another guy. Even if he were to meet some other girl...there's no guarantee that she also hasn't been in any prior relationships and there's no 100% guarantee that she'd tell him the truth. In fact, there's no 100% guarantee that even the guy told her the truth about his previous affairs. And if he did have former girlfriends....did that make him unworthy in her eyes? If he's the kind of guy that thinks it's A-OKAY for him to have as many affairs as he wants but his future wife better be pristine......then do you want to be with someone with such double standards?
Talk to him...see how he responds....then take it from there.
