What should b the Role of Man in War between Saasooooooo Maa & Bahaoo Rani. Being a Obdient Son & Loving Husband what type of charactre he sould play???
Boys Participation would be highly appreciated ?
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
Suicide Bomber
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w …, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
^^
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
refuse to get involved at all.... jiss ko jiss say larna hai, larray... just dont get me involved.....
soon women will learn they really do havta fight it out amongst themselves...
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
Why are they fighting? Traditionally (and of course this is not always the case) the conflict arises because women exercise control/power through their households/domestic spheres and the males they are close to.
-If the women feel helpless, disenfranchised, etc, then they will try to get the support and love of the men closest them to help them feel stronger.
-If the women have nothing to call their own (perhaps they're in the same household, or one is intruding into the space of the other), then they are going to be in conflict.
I think the guy shouldn't take sides, unless there is someone who is actually "right" (and that's rarely the case because this issues are always complex and reflect a lot of emotional baggage). But either way, he should make sure that each has her own space, has a sense of purpose/usefulness (a career, goal, etc), feels loved and supported by her family, and he should understand that the topic of the argument may not be the real reason for conflict.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
honestly mils and dils shud stop dragging da man into their "wars".
i mean 2 adults shud have da ability to settle out their differences without making a third party taking sides.
sometimes its juz a matter of understanding da other person and their nature and then deal with them "psychologically".
and of course men shud make their stands clear frm da very start, i'm sure every man wants his mom and his wife to get along but if tat doesnt happen then he shud make both parties understand tat he loves them both and hopes they can sort things out amiably.
men juz hav to be really patient in such situations, instead of getting frustrated and uttering da wrong words to his mom/wife he shud always strive towards keeping da peace and get to da root of da problem. most importantly he has to be firm in his decisions to solve wateva problems da 2 women in his life hav with each other.
some decisions can be tuff, like shifting out of his parent's home, but if tat prevents relationships from going sour then he have to make da final decision. men are logical creatures. shd remain so. :D
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
soon women will learn they really do havta fight it out amongst themselves...
Noway.....you have to get involved. If everyone (m-in-law, d-in-law and, son etc.) knows about Islam, this whole problem would not occur at all. But these problems occur because we are ignorant of Islam and know nothing about it. The biggest problem I've seen is that when the son gets married, his mom (not all of them) starts becoming jealous thinking that his wife is trying to steal him away or something. And this problem mostly occurs within Desi or Arabs.
A son has to keep a balance between his mother and his wife. Islam says that give the rights to every1 who deserves them. I don't believe in this desi myth that "Saas aur Bahu kabhi maa beti Nahi ban sakte". This is only possible if everyone knows about Islam and follows islamic teachings.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w …, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
^ Or the whole desi attitude “you can always marry another woman and have more kids, but ull only have one mother.” Sick, ignorant jahil creeps :yukh:
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
Husband should provide a secure household for his Wife, where NO ONE **no matter who they are can interfere!**
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
Daughter in law should be given her own space in the form of another 'house'.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w …, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
Only if there are ghair-mehram men in house such as husband’s brothers. Other than that, I think that parents should be taken care of unless the husband got a job somewhere else and the husband & wife have to move but the parents want to stay in the same house. Although most parents I’ve seen that when ALL of their children are married, they prefer not to stay in one particular house. They fly across the globe every few months to spend a little time with each of their son/daughter. I think that’s cool.:k:
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
dunno ko unn kai makaam pai rakhai...simple......i beleive respect taab hi rehti hai jaab saab seperate rahain.....anyways no comments on this..as u ppl wont agree wid them:)
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
a man should not take a part in such matter if other want him to get involved so he should stictly showed unwilling to become a part of them this would be work a lot
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
^I think that's a cowardly thing to do. Almost always it involves the guy. The "You deal with it" attitude is really immature and abandons both mom and wife.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
He should try to mediate if the situation involves him in some way. He needs to realize that if one side has a problem with the other, they shouldn't be coming to him about it. One of the best things my husband did early in our marriage was tell his sister to stop coming to him with complaints about how I did things, and tell me directly if there was a problem. Complaints are now down about 90% (to my face, at least:)). If there is a problem, we now try to address it directly, which is easier for me than her, becase I am a more direct person.
Someone who always complains to a third party is not genuinely interested in solving the problem, they are only interested in causing new ones. A husband should be smart enough to see this. Also if the DIL is receiving her rights, such as having a home of her own, you are much less likely to see the everyday carping.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
A husband should not be unduly influenced either by the mother or the wife and should instead alway side with fairness as he sees it.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
I dont have any in laws at all so i dont have any of these saas/bahu issues. But in a twisted way i do miss it as well cos i always wonder how it wud have been to have had in laws.
Re: What Should Be The Role Of A Man In War B/w ......, Mother-in-Law&Daughter-in-law
You do get some really nice saas...my parents are very nice...they see their daughter in laws as daughters and treat them as daughters. They would probably like their daughters in law more than daughters as daughters are 'priya maal'.