Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
I wouldn't tell them unless you are positive that they'll still accept you. Just be true to yourself and don't care about what anyone else has to say. It's your life, and no one should insult you or judge you for it. Just do what you feel is right, and that's all anyone can ask.
Sorry for a comment off topic, but I couldn't control my tears after reading your post. I don't remember reading anything more depressing than this in the past.
@ Topic. As far as telling your mother is concerned, if you think (Allah forbid) that you are at the point of no return and her prayers won't work for you, then please don't tell it to her for the time. (As you said she is religious) with no offense, my personal understanding from past observations is that if she lost hope in bringing you back, she might regret giving birth to you.
I might be wrong, but a mother can NEVER imagine for even a SINGLE second, that her child has decided to put himself in hell FOREVER.
I wouldn't talk much after reading
BUT as a brother kindly forgive me for sharing this minor story of the atheist who was the strongest of dis believer of Allah (s.w.t) when once felt asleep while in a cave all alone and the entrance of the cave was closed by a large stone. All his atheistness was gone when his 3 days hungry stomach, his beating heart (after listening horrible sounds), his fearful eyes in the dark, his aching head and his weak body was able to convince him that there is someone who would get him out of this minor glimpse of hell in this world.
If his mother regretted giving birth to him because he left her religion, she's not a mother at all. Love is unconditional, and we don't stop loving someone just because they disagree with us. If his mother did that, good riddance to her. That's the outlook of someone who is worthless.
Again, this is YOUR belief. He doesn't believe in hell, nor do millions and millions of other people. Don't try those scare tactics, they aren't compatible with morality.
Haven't you figured it out? He said he left Islam. He's not your brother. And don't say "forgive me," and then try to scare him. That's not asking for forgiveness, that's being an ass.
This isn't about your faith and stop trying to convert him. STOP. It's common decency. You don't see anyone else going around SHOVING their beliefs down your throat, so kindly don't do it to anyone else.
In other words, grow up and leave him alone.
If my son comes to me and tells me that , I will laugh at him and let it go. I know he will come back to religion eventually. I did. If not it is his loss not mine.
That's a bit presumptuous and even more insulting.
If his mother regretted giving birth to him because he left her religion, she's not a mother at all. Love is unconditional, and we don't stop loving someone just because they disagree with us. If his mother did that, good riddance to her. That's the outlook of someone who is worthless.
Again, this is YOUR belief. He doesn't believe in hell, nor do millions and millions of other people. Don't try those scare tactics, they aren't compatible with morality.
Haven't you figured it out? He said he left Islam. He's not your brother. And don't say "forgive me," and then try to scare him. That's not asking for forgiveness, that's being an ass.
This isn't about your faith and stop trying to convert him. STOP. It's common decency. You don't see anyone else going around SHOVING their beliefs down your throat, so kindly don't do it to anyone else.
In other words, grow up and leave him alone.
I think your post just shows your mentality.. all he tried to do was give him reasons from his own understanding of what could happen. Yes a mothers love is unconditional but that mother also loves the fact that her son is muslim (your mother might not care but most mothers do) so for the sake of her happiness he can avoid telling her that.
^I agree that a mother would never want her child in pain and it would be impossible for her to let it like that. Would a mother let her child if he insists on remaining in the house even if an earthquake threats to collapse it ?
I understand your perspective. You might be right, but I would like to present you another perspective, just consider it as a possibility.
In my whole life I have come across people who have tried to guide me through ways they thought were best for me but were against my beliefs, BUT neither I got angry at them nor did I develop any bad thinking about them, because I was sure that their intentions were sincere, and they were trying to force me towards their thinking only because they wish good for me. I didn’t mind if they tried it by hook or by crook. Their example was like that of a fire brigade member who just can’t sit there and let any man burn himself. Even if his judgment is wrong at least his intentions are sincere.
Some people thought that I should revise my course work one more time and it is alright if I smoke in order to keep myself awake. Others thought wine is good for me after a hectic routine. Some thought while alone for 3 years in another country after getting engaged it would be better for me to satisfy my desires through immoral (in my belief not theirs) ways till I get married. Some even told me Jesus would be so happy if I become a Christian, and scared me that I am playing with fire by practicing a different religion…etc.
They at times even scare me to make me do things they wanted but I never thought they are “pushing it down my throat”. Some of them I used to avoid because of their bad activities (in my opinion) but they still consider me “brother” because they were sincere with me.
And I was not trying to scare him, that is the only question which no Atheist in my life has been able to answer. When they are in trouble and scared and no one else is there to help them, they leave atheism for a while and start believing in one God till they get out of trouble, that is called double standards.
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
Have you yet broken the news to yourself? Questioned your own belief? Studied, researched, etc?
The question whether to tell your family or not is secondary.
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
first of all wen ur not afraid from Allah by saying these unforgivable words then y r u so hesitant in telling ur parents?? it simply proves that u aint sure about this issue...this iz wat a true "BETRAYAL" is...u betrayed ur religion ur Allah...cuz of him ur here in this world living a respectful life...dun worry u'll soon learn a lesson cuz after all its ur choice to choose hell....n sorri to say MR afridi i pity u...ur sayin us not to convince u...but atleast i cant support u in this issue where ur denying from almighty's presence...ur not discussing ur sick love life here...it the matter of our religion...n we r not a weak believer lyk u (alhumdullilah)...u r saying this cuz may be uve suffered in ur lyf...but did u suffer more than our prophet??? i bet u didnt!....ur parents r reli unlucky to have a child lyk u!...oh luk at u ur asking US tht shud i tell my parents....for god's sake oopss sorri i cant even say u tht....get urself checked cuz i cant c ur future tht much gud! ask ur question from sumone who thinks lyk u....cuz i dun think so none of us agree in wat ur saying!
first of all wen ur not afraid from Allah by saying these unforgivable words then y r u so hesitant in telling ur parents?? it simply proves that u aint sure about this issue
Hold on! he do not believe in God because of whatever reasons but definately his parents have a real presence in his life with all the senses. It proves nothing but that he cares for his family.
...this iz wat a true "BETRAYAL" is...u betrayed ur religion ur Allah...cuz of him ur here in this world living a respectful life
Freedom of choice is not betrayal, if you think that he should not have this kind of freedom then you are changing the religion into a mafiadom.
...dun worry u'll soon learn a lesson cuz after all its ur choice to choose hell
Wake up and smell the coffee if he do not believe in God, how can your threat of hell is going to convince him
....n sorri to say MR afridi i pity u...ur sayin us not to convince u...but atleast i cant support u in this issue where ur denying from almighty's presence...ur not discussing ur sick love life here...it the matter of our religion...n we r not a weak believer lyk u (alhumdullilah)
You have a right of opinion. As per my thinking it really takes courage to voice your true feelings. Har lallu panju ka kaam nahin hai, to question the norms
...u r saying this cuz may be uve suffered in ur lyf...but did u suffer more than our prophet??? i bet u didnt!
Thats a very fast bet as if you personally knew both of them, strange.
....ur parents r reli unlucky to have a child lyk u!
Too bad the religion has taught you to talk with this venomous tone.
..oh luk at u ur asking US tht shud i tell my parents
Yes probably he is mistaken to ask a question like this, thinking of freedom of choice, what a joke.
...for god's sake oopss sorri i cant even say u tht....get urself checked cuz i cant c ur future tht much gud! ask ur question from sumone who thinks lyk u....cuz i dun think so none of us agree in wat ur saying!
He should not say anything to his parents until he is absolutely sure. BTW your comment about his future is amusing if not outright funny. Almost all the atheists I know are responsible and lead perfectly normal and successful lives.
Tell me miss Plusha; in case an atheist wants to become muslim and he is reluctant to do it so he do not hurt his mother. One question will be what should he do? the second question is would you be as critical of him as you are now?
Everybody have a right to live his life as he/she wants. As far as I know Islam allows to change religion without this kind of ridicule from anyone.
ummmm i am still trying to figure where he said he has left ISLAM???
to b honest ur the one being an a$$ not STP
STP-great advice thats sooo true
p.s- no offence intended for anyone
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
I know my dad will yell at my mum and say '' me kehta thaa ke bachon ko pakistan le chalo yahaan reh kar begerat ho jayen ge or khuda ka khauf nahi rahe ga'' ::D
I know my dad will yell at my mum and say '' me kehta thaa ke bachon ko pakistan le chalo yahaan reh kar begerat ho jayen ge or khuda ka khauf nahi rahe ga'' ::D
LOL AHAHA......this is sooo trueee!!!!
My dad would be like "mein ne kaha tha yahan reh kar ye canadian aur goray bachoon ki tarah ho jayen gay"
I'm not sure what country you're in but if you grew up in a non-muslim country your parents will blame the country forsure!!!
and I have a sense that you're not very religious at the moment. I mean I'm sure you dont pray or anything so what difference would it make if you told them or not. BUT I kind of get it in a way if someone converts they wanna tell the whole world that they've changed their religion. And it would make sense if you wanted to announce it to the world for not believing in God anymore so go for it but you might not be taken seriously by them.
Hold on! he do not believe in God because of whatever reasons but definately his parents have a real presence in his life with all the senses. It proves nothing but that he cares for his family.
Freedom of choice is not betrayal, if you think that he should not have this kind of freedom then you are changing the religion into a mafiadom. Wake up and smell the coffee if he do not believe in God, how can your threat of hell is going to convince him You have a right of opinion. As per my thinking it really takes courage to voice your true feelings. Har lallu panju ka kaam nahin hai, to question the normsThats a very fast bet as if you personally knew both of them, strange.Too bad the religion has taught you to talk with this venomous tone.Yes probably he is mistaken to ask a question like this, thinking of freedom of choice, what a joke.He should not say anything to his parents until he is absolutely sure. BTW your comment about his future is amusing if not outright funny. Almost all the atheists I know are responsible and lead perfectly normal and successful lives.
Tell me miss Plusha; in case an atheist wants to become muslim and he is reluctant to do it so he do not hurt his mother. One question will be what should he do? the second question is would you be as critical of him as you are now?
Everybody have a right to live his life as he/she wants. As far as I know Islam allows to change religion without this kind of ridicule from anyone.
lolzzz u ppl r reli Farigh...but let me remind u wat all i wrote waz for Mr afridi...dunno frm where u jumped in?!hehe...if he has freedom of speech so do i....i'll still stick on to wat i said...i may be a bit rude but this iz how i think...i reli dun have enuff tym 2 give u any justifications infact i reli dun want 2!
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
heyyy afridi...i just noticed uve got 786 in ur nik...everyone knows wat it stands for...wat's ur age btw?...m just curious...well i'll pray tht hope Allah guides u n grant u satisfaction!
lolzzz u ppl r reli Farigh...but let me remind u wat all i wrote waz for Mr afridi...dunno frm where u jumped in?!hehe...if he has freedom of speech so do i....i'll still stick on to wat i said...i may be a bit rude but this iz how i think...i reli dun have enuff tym 2 give u any justifications infact i reli dun want 2!
Instead of laughing off try to answer the question which I have posted. I fyou are incapable of doing that, well I can understand.
What you wrote was for Mr. Afridi, but it applies to a lot of other people.
You want to stick to what you said is your prerogative but means nothing to me because that what it is. If you have sensible rebutal come forward otherwise hide in the hole where you live.
You have freedom to speak and I will be as rude as yourself. You believe in a religion which is full of ambigious rituals. If not tell me if you have met any angels, djins, messengers and above all have you ever seen a miracle yourself. What is that story about hell and heaven? have you ever met anyone who has been to heaven? or are you living in hell?
Saying hahahaha is not enough. Come up with something sensible and we talk.
And ofcourse you dont have time now, it happens to a lot of people when they dont have anything to say. People like you have enough time to attack others who dont talk back but when someone want to talk you dont have time. How convinient. If you dont have time next time do not start pecking on the keyboard without thinking.
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
Afridi lot of time people think on your line of thoughts but always remember you will not be in this world without a maker, I am a non believer in religion for long time its all bulls but I do believe in a supreme being, you can call me agnostic/skeptic. Religion to me is a hogwash, as there where no political movements in those times, up came the religion.
Whatever you do, please please do not hurt your parents as you might change your mind later. Be sure of your standing before you make any announcement.
If you desire to accept the religion at the end it's all fine, the main idea is that you have to be satisfied in your heart. Forget about all the negetive feedback from theist and the atheist alike. Do what you think is right in your heart.
..If I told my family that I didn't believe in God anymore, I know this topic is somewhat about religion, but it is more about relationships, so I feel it's appropriate in this forum....should I expect to get kicked out of my house, will they treat me any differently, my mother is really religious, my sister is somewhat religious, all the guys in my family are not that religious. I would value your opinions in this matter, like to remind you that this thread is not for you to convince me that my views are incorrect but to give me some feedback on how it will affect my relationship with my family members.
Wow aren't you the same person who used to be very religious and argue about islamic stuff together with Anil khan? I want to know what happened?
I don't know about your family but my parents know that I am agnostic they have no prblms with it...but again they aren't v religious. However my nani is very religious. She has been like this all her life. I wouldn't tell her about my beliefs nor do I expect that she would understand me. It doesn't harm anyone to join her with namaz every once in a while. I understand and respect her beliefs and don't want to create any tension or hurt by telling her. When you want to live with people, you have to compromise.
I'd say if your mom is going to get hurt, then just keep quite. Humari society main religion aik aise chez hai jo bachpaan se sikhaye gai hai...they would never understand your view, no matter how hard you try. Khamkhai mahol karab hoga.
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
I am saddened to see this thread. I don't know what u have experienced to have lost ur faith in Allah (swt) but Iman is the only thing we have that is of any worth; without it on roz-e-maisher we will not be able to get to the other side.
There is still time; repent bro, repent.
If my son comes to me and tells me that , I will laugh at him and let it go. I know he will come back to religion eventually. I did. If not it is his loss not mine.
well said:)
I am saddened to see this thread. I don't know what u have experienced to have lost ur faith in Allah (swt) but Iman is the only thing we have that is of any worth; without it on roz-e-maisher we will not be able to get to the other side.
There is still time; repent bro, repent.
so true...i agree!
Re: What kind of reaction would I get if....
My question to you is, what has changed in your life to bring you to the conclusion that you no longer believe in Allah? I know this is not what the thread is about, but have you come across some sort of pain, misery or challenge which has changed the way you think?
As far as your parents are concerned, if what youre doing in your eyes is correct, what do you have to fear? It's obvious that you'll hurt their feelings, I can't even begin to imagine if my child, who i raised with all the love in the world, who i bestowed all of my beliefs in turned around and said 'i think youre wrong'.
All we can do is say dua for you, and ask Allah to put you back on the path of belief, and if that is not possible, to give your family the strenth they need to get through this.
Good luck to you.