Re: What is an “average Pakistani girl”?
What do you mean by Average Pakistani girl. You want to say that average Pakistani girls are no more average.
On a scale from 1 - 10 where 1 means extremely paindoo and 10 means extremely modern, an average pakistani girl ranks on 5.
I think following are the key characteristics of an average pakistani girl:
She lives with her parents until she is married off in a arranged setting, That’s how family system should be
She knows how to cook (although she does not cook regularly before marriage, but she is expected to cook regularly after marriage),
She is expected to care for her brothers, father (before marriage) and husband and other male members after marriage (things which are done by males themselves in the western society like doing dishes, ironing etc), To take care of her father and brother is nice, every girl should do but after marriage we don’t have any obligation to serve our husband’s side family. Yes a girl should take care of her husband but there is nothing in Islam even that girls should take care of her in laws. Its our society’s ridiculous expectations from well educated girls.
She is not allowed to work if any of her brothers/ father approve, That’s Ok we should respect our brothers and fathers view.
She is expected to leave her career if her brother/ father/ husband/ in-laws want her to, Its upto her if she wants to work after marriage then she should clear this before marraige to her in laws so that there will be no issues. Many families does not mind working girls.
She is expected to say yes to a rishta even if she does not like the guy Its our religious right to say no if we don’t like a guy
She is expected to leave her studies in the middle if the family wants her to marry If she is not ready she should discuss this with her parents. many girls continue their studies even after marriage and kids.
She is expected to start the family immediately after the marriage There is no more AVERAGE pakistani guy who wants family immediately after marriage, so girls can discuss this with her husband if she doesn’t want to start a family. As its her right to say NO to kids if she is not ready
She is asked to always smile and accept all the interference from her in-laws even in her very personal and private matters Yes she gets irritated with all those interferences because she knows that they have no rites to interfere in her personal matters or marital matters specially. That’s why there is no concept of joint family in our religion.
She is expected to continue her marriage even if she is going through torture Why should she continue her marriage if she has been tortured. She has a rite of divorce to get rid of her mentally sick husband. Why people expect that she should live with any mentally sick man. These type of relationships not only effects her life but also her children.
Her dressing, her education, her choice of friends, her decisions to go out etc etc all are controlled by her family before marriage and her husband and in-laws after marriage Yes parents have all the rights to control their children because they are concerned about their children. but after marriage only husband has these rights. Brothers, fathers and husbands will be answerable for their sisters, daughters and wives action not in laws. Again our religion has given these rights to her husband, brother and father not any tom dick or harry.
The list is long. I just mentioned few
Now after giving explanations for every point i think i have cleared my point that if today’s girl knows her rights and obligation then it does not mean that she is more impressed with western lifestyle. We as a Pakistani AVERAGE girls know whats right and whats wrong because we are educated and ambitious girls. We know what obligations we have as a Pakistani Average girl
