What do women bring to the table?

Lifestyle Relationships
21

Re: What do women bring to the table?

I think married men should answer this thread...coz am sure no matter what a woman is gonna say...the answer is gonna be shot down...and I also feel that only a married man can answer this question properly...coz he is actually married and knows what his wife has brought to the table....

I could tell you what I have already brought to the table, and I am not even married (no..am not talking abt any hanky panky )...but that would be me putting my personal life on GS. But I am glad he already knows what I am capable of bringing to his table...

22

Re: What do women bring to the table?

Can't play Youtube at work. Someone wanna cliff note it?

23

Thanks. However, you just insulted all of woman-kind there.

If you want to find a woman who wants to work, I am sure you will find plenty who'd be financially stable and be able to support you if you were to lose your job etc.

If you are talking about physical security, then no, not like you men. But you can't carry your child OR give birth. But many-a-times women ARE very resiliant and emotionally stronger than men (obviously not always).

Loyalty is a stupid question. If even one of them fails at that, they fail the relationship.

What a woman brings depends on the kind of woman YOU want to be with. A woman can bring financial security, emotional intelligence necessary to run intimate relationships well, social intelligence, empathy and nurturance, emotional support. All those things without which an average man would be unable to form strong, deep, meaningful bonds.

Mind you, mens' best/most initmate bonds are with their female partners and womens' best/most intimate bonds are with their girlfriends (assuming heterosexuality). You don't get to share that amazing bond if you don't have someone who is that empathic and high in EQ (American Research).

P.S. All of this is generalization.

24

Re: What do women bring to the table?

The point of this thread was to highlight the prism by which men are chosen as suitable marriage material. It is pay day. Regardless of how many people say "I am not like that, or I would never do that", in Pakistani society men are valued on their abilities to provide materialistic luxuries that do not in anyway contribute to the normal functioning of a family unit.

A guy can beat his wife senseless but if he can provide a luxurious house, fly off to Paris or Geneva every 2 or 3 months, he is by desi standards a great catch and extremely good marriage material.

More so when it comes to women, if the same lens is used to denote value, nothing of value can be found as the notion is based on materialistic needs to be provided by the man. I find it amazing that the main emphasis placed on women is not equality in the marriage but rather in the household.

The notion that marriage is more of a business deal in Pakistani communities is appalling to say the least but more so that the kids getting married in this day and age follow the same stupidity a few decades later.

25

Re: What do women bring to the table?

I understand the point that you're raising now.

The thing is that the society expects a lot of stuff from both men and women. Women are expected to not be individuals, to not have opinions, to follow the men in their lives; from fathers, brothers to husbands. They are taught to "compromise" which basically means having no personality of their own. All of those things, according to the culture, make a marriage work.

The reason why a man who makes enough money but beats his wife is ok, is because the woman, in that situation is financially dependent on him and is never taught to stand up for herself.

So, no, men are not the only ones who have to live up to or fight ridiculous expectations.

However, the good news is that, there aren't a whole lot of people who are like that. You do NOT have to marry one is was brought up in that way. None of the people I know would put up with physical abuse or let their loved ones put up with it.

Most women I know don't want to depend on their guys financially, completely.

I agree that seeing marriage as a business deal is indeed appalling. It is disrespectful to men to see them as money-making machines (MMM), just as much as it is to see women as the slaves of the money-making machines.

Like I mentioned, things are getting better with time. There is less emphasis on women to be slaves and less on men to be MMMs. Now, I presume, people look for people who know the value of hard work and have some passion - at least that is what I am seeing around me.

26

Re: What do women bring to the table?

My concern is not regarding idiotic expectations it is the manner in which men are seen in material means and nothing more. Its kinda ironic that gals want a sensitive romantic guy like Sleepless in Seattle, but when it comes down to brass tacks they side with traditional, lets get a nice house and 20 servants deal.

Things get better over time indeed for those exposed to alternate view points and cultures. That is not the case in Pakistan though. The fact that jaheez now includes houses, cars, and so much more is ****ing insane.

Lastly but not least I am a victim in all of this. Everybody assumes I am a cold-hearted snake. Which is not fair. It is such a hard job always being judged so unfairly and with such disdain. sigh

27

I am sorry you have to go through that. I agree that it is ridiculous to see a man's worth by the money he makes and ignore everything else that that person may have.

28

Re: What do women bring to the table?

security, loyalty, house chores, and blah blah are all and can be bought by money as you have said the guy is well off

But the ONLY thing money cant buy is TRUST and a good mother and a good wife

29

Not an issue related to me at all. Just a cry into the darkness against the injustices forced down on the male gender!

30

Re: What do women bring to the table?

I have a dream. A dream of a perfect world where a man's worth would be reduced to a precious piece of meat by all the hot ladies alike.

31

Re: What do women bring to the table?

sniff What a beautiful dream. Brought a tear to my eye.

32

Re: What do women bring to the table?

beautiful dreams only come true for the rich and handsome men :D

33

especially true for some people living in pakistan

when the girl(her parents) say they just want a nice educated guy, thats not entirely true what they mean is

Daktar and/or PHD (this is purely for show off and status purposes not for academic)

and/or family status
and/or faran nationality list goes on...

better to stay away from this sort of scum

34

Re: What do women bring to the table?

hmmmm… she brings what Eve brought to Adam - Companionship.

She brings beauty to your life. ( your room, which was previously stinking from ur socks n boots smell, cig smoke, is now drenched with her favorite perfume most of the times. the white, gray n black colors which u mostly see in ur closet, is suddenly laden with all colorful dresses. your bathroom sink which had a lonely toothbrush, shaving cream and blades on it, has now many items with interesting packing n colors. while brushing ur teeth, u can find a new hobby of reading on the packs , what is it, what is it for? lol )

She brings smile to your lips. (are your smiling now :wink: )

She brings you babiesssss… cute gol matol , pink n white. she is so innocent that she starts calling you BaBa while teaching this pink creature who are you to them. :rose:

She serves you food only after she has tasted it 10 times during cooking. So you like when u eat. that satisfies her.

She sleeps whole nite on one edge of the bed, and gives u more space, so you can have a nice sleep.

She tells you you look great in certain colors.

She trusts you so much, that she leaves her parents and siblings for you, forever. :naak:

what else do u need from her? and what you can give her from above? :halo:

btw the guys i have chosen for myself till now , none of them had good jobs and accounts were totally khaleeeee. I thought why should i let someone nice go only coz today he doenst have the money to support me. I want him to be educated and sensible. Daulat Allah dey ga. So in my case all of them had pretty much none “worldy attractions” to bring on the table… :hinna:

35

2 questions. :konfused:

  1. Who the heck is she?

  2. What did you do with all the guys you have chosen for yourself? How many are they? :-/

36

Re: What do women bring to the table?

^ 1- she is a woman.

2- Not many lol. actually i should have said guys i have LIKED so far for long term relationship.

37

Re: What do women bring to the table?

^ Are you still single ? :@:

38

Seems CM ............

You are looking for a Woman Like Benazir Bhutto..............to bring to your TABLE!

I wonder what she she saw in Mr Asif?

39

Re: What do women bring to the table?

^ Pigs must find each other attractive.

40

Pigs are US................:D