what are your thoughts?

Re: what are your thoughts?

I am supporting him every way I can. I am worried the way he is reacting to it. He is not even the shadow of the person he used to be. He is worried as he might have to start with a scratch as his experience was of specialised nature and not really transferable. He is very sensitive and he has taken this situation very hard on himself.

I can't see him suffering like this. Today he text me that he is really sorry that I have go through this because of him and this makes him further depressed. I understand that this is temporary but then these things happen in life and one has to get up and move on. Again, I cant leave him but future scares me :(

Re: what are your thoughts?

Still, I cant make sense of how our location affects this?

Re: what are your thoughts?

Location will tell us how many resources he has. Some countries are better equipped to help people than others. There are helplines, councillors, support groups who can listen to him. It will be telling if he refuses help because it tells you how he'll react to other random problems you'll have in the future and whether he will take your support or not.

Re: what are your thoughts?

This is what is called life. He happens to be a sensitive person. Which is a good thing. The future is scary for all of us. So many unknowns. But that's what marriage is about. When one is down the other picks him or her up. And you are doing that.

Since you have decided to stick with him through thick and thin, just understand that all this is par for the course in any marriage. Setbacks will always be there. That is when a marriage is tested.

Good luck.

Re: what are your thoughts?

Sorry. I could not think of this. Its UK.

Re: what are your thoughts?


by location i meant the country of your residence. the privileges a psychiatrist and a psychologist has vary from country to country. what i mentioned about the differences between a psychologist and a psychiatrist was for Canada but in the UK a psychologist can also write a prescription as far as i know.

so, in your country, it could be different as far as a psychologist's privileges are concerned.

does it make sense now?

Re: what are your thoughts?

He needs to do so.

Since this is related to job loss he would be find once he finds another job. But that does not mean that he should not seek professional help at this point of time.
Experts say that for many people, losing a job not only means the loss of income and benefits, but also the loss of one's identity.
Losing a job can prove especially traumatic for men, who tend to identify more with their careers.
Some people grieve over loss of job in same way as they grieve over loss of a loved one. It's perfectly normal for a person to grieve the loss of a job. It's important to remember, however, that a career is not an identity.

Re: what are your thoughts?

situation-based depression is easiest to treat because the source of it removed as soon as he/she finds a job. in the meantime, treatment with medication is quite easy. taking the patient off of the meds is a gradual process. withdrawl is usually done under the supervision of a professional.

Re: what are your thoughts?

He will need to be seen by GP first then he will refer him to a psychiatrist/ physcologist if he feels it necessary. The GP may just prescribe medication for depression himself. But I would try and avoid anti depressants as they can be addictive.

Tell him to pray to Allah and read Quran this should help and if he has subr this is the biggest thing.

Re: what are your thoughts?

Well i say depends on type of condition your husband is in. And it is true..that people with mental illness are in complete denial that they have issues and refuse to seek help such as counselling or any other problem. First off, I pray for your husband's well being and please do stand by him as long as it is not deter-mental to your own well being.
The problem with people with depression is that they are very un-motivated, have no sense of goal in life. Normally, as i was speaking to friend of mine..she is a psychiatrist..stated that people with chronic depression feel very helpless. The best way to get them help is through..counselling. And not by anti-depressant or anything like that. Yes there is a hope..as long as..a person with chronic depression accepts that he/she has that issue and seek professional help. So encourage him to get professional help..coz family and friends can help to an extent. And kudos to you by standing by him.

Re: what are your thoughts?

1) How long ago did he lose his job?

2) Does he have any friends or family members in the city he lives in and is close to? Someone that YOU can contact.

Re: what are your thoughts?

Been more than 3 months I guess, not in the city where he lives.

Re: what are your thoughts?

We are not married yet and Jazak ALLAH for your prayers. I am asking him to come back to Pakistan (at least he has friends and family here) but he says he don't stand a chance in Pakistan and he has to do minimal type of work as his experience is not transferable only his degree and soft skills wont land him good job.

Re: what are your thoughts?

The best therapy in my opinion for him is to talk things over with one of his close friends whom he trusts and has known them long time and they are not related to him! He will be fine Insha Allah!

Re: what are your thoughts?

Talked to him this morning. He is trying hard to hold it up but seems like odds are not really in his favour. I don't want to push him too much to come back to Pak cuz its not very good in Pakistan either.

Don't know what to do :( I am praying for him for last 3 months in all prayers and tahajjud :(

Re: what are your thoughts?

depends on the severity of the illness