Bobby1
March 17, 2017, 3:31am
2
Re: What am I doing wrong?
I work with mostly men in our group. All very southern men that buy guns like a hobby, love hunting, say things that are far from politically correct…for the most part completely different from me.
I am not sure if they are sexist or if I’m over-reacting. I do tend to overly analyze sometimes but my supervisor’s boss is a woman and my previous supervisor also works with me but in a different section with one of the guys I work with.
Some of the comments they say about the women around us and there have been so many but recently:
One employee(woman) was missing her folders and files on a network drive. One of the guys I work with was the one in charge of maintaining those network user folders. When I inquired about this to him, he said that she’s a b*tch and she’s like that so just somehow appease her. because that’s how she is. Data especially important work files will be valuable to anyone and I can totally understand why she might be a bit panicked.
My supervisor’s boss has a biweekly meeting on Monday morning updating all about what is new at our organization in terms of other departments. The guys I work with usually have only negative stuff to say about her. It’s called the “Open Mic” session but they call it the “Open Mouth” session because she hosts it.
My previous supervisor that does work with one of them, is constantly talked about in a negative way by them. Somehow she annoys them. I loved my previous boss, she was the one that gave me my first job so I feel like defending her whenever they say anything unnecessarily negative about her.
Even with me, they do backbite when I’m not in the office. I’m fairly new so I’m going to ask questions, two of them do assist when I have questions about something I’ve never done before and I’m learning it, which is great but they talk negatively about me behind my back. Another one has the most amount of knowledge in this particular field but is completely condescending and arrogant so I talk to him as less as possible or only a question that would need a one word answer. I know they’re smart but laughing at the lack of knowledge of others shouldn’t be their stress relief. The amount of confidence I have is much lower than it was before I started working with this all men group.
I have a sense of humor but then some things they say are just so outright alarming.
I’m asking the Almighty to give me strength or at least a lot of tolerance so I can work with them because I keep thinking maybe I’m just not open minded enough or I’m just taking things too seriously.
I’m just wondering, is this the nature of men? I always keeping thinking what if I was married to someone like this, my only thoughts are that it wouldn’t be fun because when I get off work, I keep hearing myself thank the Almighty that I’m not married to any of them. I see that these guys are practical and when an issue comes up approach it in the most logical way to get it resolved because of the amount of experience they have. I respect their knowledge. Great!
These are all married men so obviously they get along good with their wives. In the past, I have not been around a lot of men in my life except for my brothers so is this something I need to get used to or learn to adjust to because I just don’t know how to ignore what they say and just take it lightly sometimes.
Keep a diary and note every such comment in detail with date and time. One such comment and they would be instantly dismissed at our corporation. No men are not like that you work in a toxic environment.