Hi all, first time posting here so please don’t be too unkind. I have a pretty unusual question. What do people normally do about their weird habits after marriage? I had my nikah done so even though I lived with my in laws for a few weeks, I never really lived with him. I lived as a guest so I was obviously not myself. Now that his immigration process is reaching an end, I am starting to get a little worried about how he would react to my habits. Some of my habits that I am worried about are as follows
-I spend an unusually long amount of time in the bathroom every morning. I usually just take a magazine in there with me, sit on the toilet and read. Sometimes I even take my favourite novel in there with me, or my cell phone and watch random youtube videos, and even my laptop on occasion. I am usually in there for 20-30 mins every morning, plus the time it takes me to shower/brush my teeth. On a good note, it takes me no more than 5-7 minutes to get dressed, wear accessories, brush hair and wear shoes.
-I never make my bed in the mornings. Even as a kid I never made it.
-I only do my laundry once a month (sometimes twice). I have so many clothes that I never run out. I can go without doing laundry for more than two months and never run out of underwear.
-I hate waxing regularly. I usually let my leg hair grow or just shave. I am a regular brazilian waxer though.
I am worried about his reaction to all this when he starts living with me. I have been trying to change for the past month but I keep falling back into the same old routine. I am even typing this post from my toilet :S
Did anyone else ever have any habits that they were worried about after marriage? If yes then did you just end up changing them?
Hai.. people have some serious marital problems here... And yours is sitting in the bathroom for too long. None of these would matter after shaadi.. nothing. People get married.. live with other person's habits and flaws (yours aren't even that). Chillax.. enjoy your singlehood. Either your husband will adjust to live with your daily/weekly/monthly routine or you will change.. will do laundry more often :D.. woh waqt to aanay do.
This is a serious issue for me. I haven't lived with anyone in over 5 years so I've never had to worry about what anyone would think. When he comes here he will obviously be living with me, so I am worried he may think I am weird or something.
I’m going to assume that you’ve never actually lived with another man before as a couple. Living with your husband, sharing a bedroom/bathroom with him and working on building a life together is a new experience. So once he moves in with you, you’ll just have to slowly work on changing these habits. As for making the bed and laundry…you’ll need to change those anyway once you have kids so you might as well start now. I don’t know ANY mom who have children and can go 1 month without doing laundry.
Before I got laser hair removal, I always shaved. Waxing isn’t the only option to have hair fee legs. More than what he thinks…why don’t you wait and see just how comfortable YOU will feel with hairy legs when you’re sharing a bed with your hubby. I have close female friends who also didn’t do personal grooming on a regular basis but once they got married, they got really self-conscious b/c someone is actually seeing “everything”. They managed to change their grooming habits real fast.
Oh also, husband thinking you’re “weird” isn’t the end of the world. And you’re also making a huge assumption that your husband himself doesn’t have some weird habits that’re MUCH worse than yours.
Maybe try implementing changes a little at a time as opposed to changing everything at once; that'll leave you exhausted and bring you back to square one. Opt for more long-term hair removal methods, so it's not something you gave to worry about every other day. I think that when you start living with someone and kids enter the picture, you're forced to accommodate to their time schedules...and that'll change how you manage your own time. As for the bathroom issue, you're enabling the habit by taking something in there to read. Try not doing that a few times and see if it makes a difference.
Toilet- Stop sitting on the toilet for that long.. you might get hemorrhoids.
Laundry- Wait till you are married... you hubby will not have clotehs that last him a month and you will be doing laundry weekly if not twice a week. (I used to do laundry monthly too because I have enough for more than 2 months, maybe even 3... but hubby needs his underwear. Hence, a day or two before he runs out, he lets me know and I throw the clothes in the washer).
Making bed- I never made my bed before but hubby makes it on weekdays so it sort of serves as inspiration. Hence, I started making it on the weekdays.
Grooming- I am lazy in that matter too... in the beginning when we got married, I used to shave weekly because I became self-conscious. It has decreased now to once a month because my hair never really grows.. not even my eyebrows, face, or arms. I was hairless to begin with but I think it depends on ur hubby's preference. If it freaks him out, then you would have to compromise and start grooming more often.
