so for your first question I would say it really depends on you and your fiance most of the time because if you are comfortable enough with your fiance to hint at what you want then I'm sure he'll try his best to get you that and parents don't intervene with the ring picking.....in my case my husband couldn't buy me a diamond ring for the engagement since it was so last minute but he knew what I wanted and for the engagement I got a gold ring which he had picked out so I loved it regardless.....later on I actually got 2 diamond rings for the wedding lmao
as far as making dresses .....don't make too many formal dresses at once because styles change rather quickly and if you don't get to where all of them then you'll feel like buying something that's more in later on but you'll still have a huge collection that you haven't worn....idk just my opinion.....so get like 5-6 heavy formal wear, a few semi formal, a few casual and lingerie really depends on you because I love buying lingerie so I bought a whole bunch
parents can get a watch for him ie a movado maybe?
the hotel question can get offensive for some annoying mother in laws who would want the bahu at home for the first night idk lol .....why don't you casually mention someone who did that for their wedding with your fiance and be like I think that was a cute idea and see what he thinks about it that way you would find out if he is up for it
not too sure about the dawats, but I think if your family doesn't throw dawats then people do talk.....my in laws threw one for my parents and my parents threw one for me and the in laws lol ......my sister in law didn't bother to throw a dawat and my aunts did inquire about it from me later ....so yes people can make a fuss out of it
hope that helped