Re: wedding gift
well my parents offered to pay for our wedding, so we took them up on it. its not a hugely expensive wedding but its not $500 either, but even if it was, they would never ask us for the money that we got as a gift. its just not done- i mean, you don't throw your kids a birthday party and then take away all of their presents to reimburse yourself. its the same principle for weddings too.
if the couple offer to give their parents that money, then thats up to them, but there shouldn't be any expectations attached to it from the parents end. and certainly, ifmy parents had those expectations, which i know for sure they don't, but if they did, i'd set them straight pretty quickly. :p