But it's unfair to expect the guests to recoup the costs.
Also, you may choose to give to cover your plate, and that's great--but if at your wedding someone gave a small gift, would you have humiliated them (and yes, it doesn't matter how "cheap" the gift is, it IS humiliating them when you point it out) and thrown a fit? No sane person with a semblance of manners would do that and THAT's what so shocking and quite frankly...gross behavior.
I second that. It is quite tacky of a couple to humiliate their guests for whatever reason!
Maybe it's just me, but a gift like that would have brought a smile on my face after a long hectic day. Although I wouldn't gift that, but you don't know the other person's financial condition.
I know I would appreciate my guests for just being a part of my special day, I don't expect them to get me any fancy gifts.
Alright I was so stuck on the basket thing to even read any further lolzz - I went back and read the entire article…and wow I am shocked myself, this couple is disgusting…I don’t know anyone who would act this way??? These two deserve each other I feel bad for the jolly rancher givers now
^ interesting to note...the article mentions the guest was an "acquaintance"....why would you invite an acquaintance and guest/date (not even a friend!) if spending $200 to wine and dine them is a such a dent in your wallet?!?
The brides should've been gracious with the gift they received. To request a 'receipt' is just plain tacky, and the txt/FB spat just plain rude and obnoxious behaviour.
On another note, if I attend a wedding, I certainly do not go with the intention of covering the cost of my plate. Spent $200 on an "acquaintance's" wedding? Why should I, when I have been invited a a guest?
If one cannot afford a fancy schmancy wedding; don't have one to begin with, especially if the intention is to recoup the cost of the wedding via cash gifts.
I dont mean to play Devils Advocate - but I have a good friend (who is Italian) who told me about their wedding culture. Gift giving is VERY different from what we have in Pakistani/Indian culture. In Italian culture, you are "supposed" to pay for your plate - so if theres a family of 5 going to a wedding, you pay $500. This is because Italians usually only invite close family and friends, and if you're so close to them, why would you want a financial burden on them? Although the brides reaction cannot be justified, neither can the jolly ranchers.
Oh and the reason why its $100 per plate, cause that's how much sit down meals cost. Buffets are half the price because of less labour cost etc. And yes, most cultures only have sit-downs.
This is because Italians usually only invite close family and friends, and if you're so close to them, why would you want a financial burden on them?
1) The 1st line of the article refers to gift givers being the brides "casual acquaintance". There is nothing in the article that even hints at the gift givers being family or even a close friend of the brides.
2) In the case of friends and even family members..........why is it the guests responsibility to make sure that the wedding isn't a financial burden on the couple? Its not the guests planning the wedding. The guests aren't the ones booking the hotel, decor, caterers etc. Accepting financial responsibility for oneself...isn't that part of being an adult? If a couple feels they're ready for marriage.....shouldn't they be capable of deciding how much money they can spend without going into debt?
I think the bride's behavior was just plain atrocious. It shows no class or manners and people like that don't deserve the $200 cash gift in the first place. As the bride, she should have accepted the present with gratitude and **never **made her guests feel so bad. It was HER choice to spend that money and not everyone is in a position to splash out $100 per person for a wedding.
The gift-ers though...they were so tacky in giving a basket full of candy at a wedding where the dinner was about $100 a plate! You either give cash or find a better present...there was no thought in this gift. It was as if they were on their way to a kid's birthday party and picked this up at Party City. Its a wedding and you know the couple is starting a new life, this wedding must have cost someone a lot of $$ so get a decent present to help out.
Non-desi weddings in general though do have a rule where you pay for your plate.
I feel bad for the jolly rancher givers now 
