simplicity is so important in every thing in life.
i often wonder why we as Pakistanis see marriages which are full of extravagance and useless waste of monies.
huge gatherings, lots of days to get thru the weddings, and then show off, of how many people are invited, what is worn by the bride and the groom etc etc..
i can understand, celebrating a wedding.
But, still, the “dhoom dharaka” concept that we have, is a bit too much for a calmer, practical person. Certainly this notion of expending endlessly on a wedding ceremony, is not a Muslim tradition. Look at Prophet’s (pbuh) daughter’s wedding’s example.
what do u folks think?
any suggestions for changes and how can we make them?
If you don't like "dhoom dharaka" then by all means do a simple masjid wala nikah.
Those who like all the rasm and rituals should go ahead and do what they want. Yes, to a large extent its a waste, however, lots of poor people get money in these extravagant marriages (i.e. all those who make bridal clothes, jewellery makers, shoe makers, wedding laborers etc).
If you don't like "dhoom dharaka" then by all means do a simple masjid wala nikah.
Those who like all the rasm and rituals should go ahead and do what they want. Yes, to a large extent its a waste, however, lots of poor people get money in these extravagant marriages (i.e. all those who make bridal clothes, jewellery makers, shoe makers, wedding laborers etc).
Your right... but wedding is a time to be happy.. and it's nice to be happy with ppl.. you should not show off... but if Allah gave you money you should use them.. ... you dont need to buy a $1000 dress just to use one day.. but maybe a $500 and use the other $500 to help a poor person.. that's what i think..
traditional desis dont party. they dont go all out on vacations and as compared to people of different cultures their day to day lives are...well.. not so wild.
weddings are the one major event in which desis go all out and spend money. I dont really think there is anything wrong with it unless you have poor relatives in your family who will be made to feel "deprived" due to your pomp and show. there are ways to spend money without making anyone else feel deprived and you do that by being humble in your affairs and treating even the less affluent relatives with respect at all times.
other than that im scared to imagine how boring life would be had it not been for weddings. i've seen people complain everytime they hear of so and so's wedding coming up "ai hai we have four weddings coming up" yet the enthusiasm with which they make it a point to attend all four of them is interesting.
u know im so sick of the whole "ohhh i'm gnna have a simple saada wedding, and give allllllllllll my money to the poor nad i'm not gonna do any rasams coz they're from the evil hindus and i'm ohhh so much more pious than you, all you mehndi-doing, fancy dress wearing, music listening ppl are going to hell"..
have ur wedding however u like, illl have my wedding however i like, so **** off
what a never ending debate ? most of the pakis ( in pakistan or abroad , older than us or the newer generation ) who consider themselves as most steadfast , righteous and stictly momin muslims even they end up having an all glamourous , hi fi n uptodate wedding , all traditionally ( full of rasams)and economically.
than y discuss it ????????????????
hehehehe... nooo i’m not mad.. in fact this has nothing to do wiht me personally. My parents and I are on the same page..
its just something abt desis that annoys the crap outta me..
sheesh, a grl can’t even rant abt/ something w/o having it be about her?
huge gatherings, lots of days to get thru the weddings, and then show off, of how many people are invited, what is worn by the bride and the groom etc etc..
i can understand, celebrating a wedding.
But, still, the “dhoom dharaka” concept that we have, is a bit too much for a calmer, practical person. Certainly this notion of expending endlessly on a wedding ceremony, is not a Muslim tradition. Look at Prophet’s (pbuh) daughter’s wedding’s example.
what do u folks think?
any suggestions for changes and how can we make them?
I also like the idea of a simple wedding. I think any wedding party would be just fine if the only expenditures were for the hall, food/catering, and purchase/rental of the required dishes, cutlery, etc.
