hi all ..
i wanted to know that as a sunni muslim, is it wrong to get married in moharram (of course skipping the 9th and 10th) … in islam the grieving period for anything is not more than 3 days … then why is the entire month blacklisted for wedding celebrations?
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
"in islam the grieving period for anything is not more than 3 days"
Three days every year ???
y even skip 9th and 10th ?
aqeel, let's be rational instead of emotional .. i am really trying to understand this as i've been thinking about it since some time now ...
it is imposible logically that you can only grieve 3 days in one year ... of course there are several events, like historical remembrances, a death, and so on and so forth ... and so i say, 3 days of grievance MAXIMUM per event ...
coming back to the topic under the newly shed light ... why do people refrain from keeping wedding dates in the entire month of moharram? the dates 9th and 10th are historically important, and thus in respect you should not keep a celebration on these dates, so what's wrong in having weddings on other dates in the same month?
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
Farrah, I have seen ppl getting married in Muhharam and Safar. It is personal prefrence, if you, your family, and in laws are fine with it, you should go ahead with your wedding plans in Muharram.
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
^^ and friends too
There's nothing wrong with having a wedding in Muharram. I myself got married in Muharram. As for avoiding the 9th or 10th, the only reason I'd consider doing that is because of its significance but not because it would be wrong as such on those particular days.
There's nothing wrong with having a wedding in Muharram. I myself got married in Muharram. As for avoiding the 9th or 10th, the only reason I'd consider doing that is because of its significance but not because it would be wrong as such on those particular days.
I would also avoid the 9th and 10th becuz of its significance. but Terrible Guy (why the name??) did you have to face any comments from people/neighbours/anyone ? ... just a little concerned ... you know how daadiz and naaniz and elderly people are ... even my own mother was like why cant we skip moharram :S
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
Dont do it to rub anyone's feelings the wrong way, but if that is the day which is suitable then even 9th or 10th is ok ..
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
Would you guys get married the 4th day of your dadz death ?
I would also avoid the 9th and 10th becuz of its significance. but Terrible Guy (why the name??) did you have to face any comments from people/neighbours/anyone ? ... just a little concerned ... you know how daadiz and naaniz and elderly people are ... even my own mother was like why cant we skip moharram :S
No, we didn't get any criticism from anyone. In my case, when I met my wife, then after the meeting then we decided to go ahead with the marriage. So then we informed our relatives. We delayed it a couple of days so that our relatives would be able to make arrangements to come. It just so happend that it fell in Muharram. So if Muharram is a convenient time for you, then by all means go ahead and have it in that month.
Dont do it to rub anyone's feelings the wrong way, but if that is the day which is suitable then even 9th or 10th is ok ..
Yes, even 9th or 10th would be fine. My tendency to not do it on those days would be similar to not doing it in Ramadan. It's just that there are other things I would like to concentrate on at that time. However, if I were to hold a wedding in that time there wouldn't be anything wrong with it.
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
Marriage of Ali ra and Fatima ra took place in Muharram, so there is nothing wrong with it.
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
^ source?
farrah, the love of our Prophet and particularly the family of the Prophet (saww) is a demand of Allah (swt) (Quran, Sura Shura, verse 23 and many Shia-Sunni Hadiths are available on this topic). When making the decision, please keep in mind the atrocities that took place in the month of Moharram to the family of our Prophet, and specially to Imam Hussain (as).
Marriage of Ali ra and Fatima ra took place in Muharram, so there is nothing wrong with it.
Yeah I would like to see a source of that. It was the beginning of Zil Hajj
Would you guys get married the 4th day of your dadz death ?
Depends on the circumstances.
My brother got married 12 days after my grandfather's death. His wedding had been planned in advance, whereas my grandfather's death wasnt. The wedding was tuned down significantly, but went ahead, as life goes on. The girl's side had made plans as well, and its not always possible changing plans on a short notice.
That said, I feel that the reason why people dont get married during Muharram in Pakistan is in order to avoid offending any group of people, not because of religious reasons. And its better to be safe than sorry.
^ source?
farrah, the love of our Prophet and particularly the family of the Prophet (saww) is a demand of Allah (swt) (Quran, Sura Shura, verse 23 and many Shia-Sunni Hadiths are available on this topic). When making the decision, please keep in mind the atrocities that took place in the month of Moharram to the family of our Prophet, and specially to Imam Hussain (as).
Is the month of Moharram to blame for those atrocities?
The idea of such anniversaries is that we remind ourselves of what happened and learn from our mistakes.
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
^It is the way of the family of our Prophet (saww) who set aside these days to mourn the pains and sufferings commited to the family of our Prophet (saww).
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
^ Nothing wrong with mourning. Its just that I think mourning should not end there. It should remind us that we should not fight among ourselves.
The point raised is that is it reasonable to 'blacklist' whole of the month? I thought Moharram (being the 'respected' month) had special significance in the Islamic tradition and getting married is an Islamic act. Maybe, one should not insist on getting married during the month but if there are logistic issues, nothing wrong with getting married either.
Re: wedding and moharram don't go together?
^agree with your first point.
2nd point is your view, and you are entitled to it. farrah asked a question clearly stating she wanted the Sunni POV and I did not want to intervene in the first place. All the best to her if its her who is getting married.
thank you for talking over this topic, i really appreciate all this information as i was completely shaking my head as to what to do ...
under the circumstances my family/in-laws and i are in, there is really no other date available than in moharram, considering everybody's holiday possibilities. and if not now, it will go more than half a year or more ahead, and nobody wants this state of uncertainty.