Wearing dupatta in front of...

[Deeba1234]

Re: Wearing dupatta in front of…

@Summerbr

Hmmm I wouldn’t do it myself. My husband was born in Lahore and grew up there, he moved to Canada when he was 15…but he’s very cool and open minded. I mean** I understand that when I go Pakistan to see his family and friends, I have to be a lot more conservative than I am here - for the short period I’ll be there. And I am OK with this. But being someone who I’m not in the long run, esp when it’s friends we are speaking about and not his immediate family would be hard for me. **

That being said - you have to see what you yourself are happy / OK to live with and what you can’t live with. I would pick my battles. I would change a few aspects of myself, that are not important to me and as does he for me but not thing that I find are more substantial. I mean if we can not even interact with each other’s friends except to be someone we’re not and in a superficial way, that would be hard for me in the long run. And would say to me there may be some compatibility issues there.

Totally agree..

Also OP, you mentioned your other half would like you to move to Pakistan after you marry, for a little while at least and you’re not too sure about it.. I think you need to sit down and think carefully about all the possible changes (good + bad) and compromises you might have to make (esp as he seems to be a bit on the conservative side).. A lot of the things might be minor and no big deal on their own but added all together could you find yourself resenting him in the long run?

Not sure if you’ve read Nadz123’s threads but she was in a similar situation (inc the dupatta issue, but her SO wanted her to wear it in the UK as well, would you be ok if yours turned round and said the same thing?).. Her experience struggling to adapt to life in Pakistan to that extent might be an extreme case but you need to think these things thru rather than just letting your heart rule your head or choosing to put it all to the bk of your mind and just hoping for the best then getting into all sorts of problems further down the line..