What do you believe are your virtues? You know…the good traits that you posses…that you believe would be an asset in a marriage? What are your vices or bad habits…or all those tendencies for which your future spouse will be a martyr for enduring? Here is your chance to let it all out!
Married folks of GS…
The same questions as above. What khoobiyan or saving graces do you have that have prevented your mate (time and again) from jumping ship? Conversely, what are those khaamiyan of yours that can rock that marital boat?
List away, people!!! Consider this a cathartic opportunity of sorts.
Keeping scores is the worst thing for a relationship, Dianne always kept score. In those days she made more money than me and contributed more for the house and would constantly remind me that she paid more for the house, if one day she did more chores than me then she would get upset etc so don’t keep scores.
Many people get into a marriage after spending 100k on the wedding marrying a stranger that they would feel love at the highest level, love is something that you have to work at, it does not just happen, everyday you treat your partner amazingly and then you create these beautiful memories, say nice things to them, do nice things for them and remember the 1:10 rule. Every time you are mean to your spouse it takes away 10 of the good things you did so at the end of years if your score on good acts is in millions and bad stuff is low then you will feel love like it is divinity.
One of our favorite things to do is I regularly watch her TV shows with her, we have this large cozy sectional. She said if she dies before me then her ghost will come to sit besides me and watch the shows and that almost made me cry.
Virtues: patient, understanding, empathetic, devoted, ambitious, prudent, respectful, courageous, nurturing, modest, sensitive, sincere, grounded in faith
Vices: stubborn at times, frugal with money, not as tech savy, hard time forgetting things, have strong opinions on some topics, like to be right, too hard on myself and sometimes others
@redvelvet sincerity is way too overrated, most of the time you have to fake it till you make it. Yeah I would say compliment her food even if it does not taste good. You have to learn to love the flaws of your partner, her flaws and her virtues are what makes her so unique. I love the fact that I know many times she does not like what I cooked for her but she still compliments me.
Virtues:
Empathy
I clean the bathroom - none other allowed
I wash dishes - none other allowed
Motherly i.e treating loved ones like my children (parents included)
Good reasoning skills
Try to be fair in everything I do
Free photographer - make ugly faces look pretty
Vices:
Eating up all food and leaving behind the crumbs
Extremely good memory - everything ever said to me will sit in a folder in my head
Mandatory can-I-taste-that dips and one-bite-checks from plates not mine
Never taking the trash out
Forced blackhead removal and untimely facials
Germophobe (has only gotten worse with time)
impulsive buying / hoarding
Overspending
Considerate
Empathetic, a little too empathetic
Confrontational/ I don’t like gossip or passive aggression
cultured :s
Cons
Gets bored easily and may lose interest in you eventually
Procrastinator but also very clutch, i save the best for last
Too generous when it comes to spending, i should be saving better
Not very organized :s but i like girls that are really put together lol
Over thinker
Willing to break up if i don’t see a future, i’m not afraid of getting divorced or just breaking up.
Struggling with my faith, since i was a child. I guess that comes with being a deep thinker lol. So if you’re super religious and judgemental then it just won’t work.
a little whitewashed
@redvelvet there is never ever a good reason to tell your wife that the food she cooked is not good enough. This phrase about fake it till you make it is a very good life tool, basically it says fake being successful and you will become successful. I was fresh from my break up of seven years and wasn’t in love with my wife and she knew it and she told me don’t worry, I am way better for you then Dianne and I will make you fall in love with me. In the beginning I faked being in love with her, I did beautiful things for her, she did for me and we started building beautiful memories together, she left the comfort of her home, went to this rain forest with me, slept in a forest on the ground in bone chilling cold cuddled up for heat, it rained torrentially on us. Despite being hydrophobic she went in a boat ride with me in a rough ocean where the boat almost capsized and that is how you fall in love, you build beautiful memories. A kind lie is better than a cruel truth.
@redvelvet we are all full of flaws, some are short, some are fat, some are not very muscular, some are not very active, some cant cook well so why just limit the truth telling to the taste of food? I dont let her cook too often for me. The other day she cooked omelet for children and burnt the egg and seemed so sad as if she had failed, i saw her sad face and said baby i actually like my eggs a bit burnt and ate the omelette and her face lit up. So if a harmless lie can make her day then why wouldn’t I do it? Here is an article
We should be thinking critically about when lying might be the right thing to do.
The truth is that we all lie?but sometimes it?s with the intention of sparing the feelings of others or preventing others from experiencing psychological harm. The new Wharton paper points to many examples of this: We might tell our host that their meat loaf is delicious or tell a colleague that their work makes a valuable contribution, when we don?t believe these things to be true.
Virtues:
I bring out the best in others and enjoy helping others grow/develop
Thoughtful- never a dull moment in my mind ; )
Not very talkative [not socially shy though]
Vices:
Bossy and very particular about certain things others don’t care for. E.g why did you use the kitchen broom for the balcony
Moody
Socially awkward in brown events/settings
Hate repetitive routine
