Lucky is the man who is the first love of a woman and lucky is the woman who is the last love of a man...
Chastity is a sign of faith, loyalty, upbringing and lots of other things...In both men and women...
More so for the woman because no man can have a spiritually intimate connection with his wife knowing in the back of his mind that his wife was enjoyed by others as well...
There is a reason behind Islam prohibiting premarital sex...It's all about two chaste partners being fully connected on a spiritual level with a clean conscience...
u r taking it in i dont know which direction. i think u r either not understanding or are not trying to understand the point. wat i tried to say was that men have done all kinds of things themselves but want a "pure" woman. and women who have done something like that are just not accepted in our culture (desi one, ofcourse) and that is not fair..
Ah, sorry about that...I read into the thread a bit differently I guess....
It's not only unfair, but it's a guaranteed way to destroy a value system.
Exactly how many men actually do these things to begin with? Im talking about sex outside of wedlock or premarital sex?
How many Paki guys do this? 3/10 max.
Why do women go for the 30% instead of the 70% good ones? or am i wrong?
sorry to interrupt but i guess u got ur facts terribly wrong, i guess u mean 30% actually accept.
Now as far as the whole question goes, after reading the whole thread as well as analyzing my own reply i guess there is no one answer to this question reason being everyone thinks in a bit different way, some think the conservative way and some a bit more liberal, the thing that matters in the end is that let the partner be honest and let the other half decide if they can deal with it, if not move one and i do agree that a lotta times girls agree to forgetting the guys past due to their parents pressure or may be just cuz " LARKA HAI " attitude. But i donot agree with the fact that guys who have done it are not looked down upon ohhhhhhh they are used as an example by all the phoopis chachis and maamis " key beta aisay larkay sey kabhi shaadi mat karna OR kabhi aisay bachalan larkay jaisay na banna" trust me ;). N e ways all i would say in the end is and this is only my opinion, can`t ppl fget the past and just live in the present but then its just me ciao.
u guys r pulling this in all different directions. anyways i hope my argument is now clear. geez, im done with this thread cuz most guys like urself refuse to admit wat ur 'kind' goes around doing is just wrong and unfair.
My! My! Where did anyone say in this thread that such behaviour is not wrong?
The truth is that, given the choice, almost all these whining women will go for a non virgin goodlooking man than a virgin ugly guy. why do you think he got to score in the first place?
The truth is that, given the choice, almost all these whining women will go for a non virgin goodlooking man than a virgin ugly guy. why do you think he got to score in the first place?
In a woman you look for "housewife" qualities and in a man you look for "making money and good economic and family sense" qualities. You produce a strong family.
The size of a woman's bust or a mans pecs are tertiary.
No, no. Not "you". Say "I". "I" look for housewife qualities. Or maybe "Men from my pind look for housewife qualities".
Some parts of the world have moved on past this housewife fetish.
So what did your husband look for?
The housewife fetish you call - can be extended to modern day "stability" fetish. People look for stability in marriage, and fun in a one night stand.
People looked for women to make a home with, not to be buddies with, although that is an outcome.
I dont know what part of America your from, but i really havent come across such self-absorbed and hedonistic groups of Pakistani males that you frequently banter about in all threads.
Why focus on a minority group when you dont have to?
Right, and most pakistanis in general tend not to be self-centered, and male-domineering in their demands of women.
...OK.
Stability is very different from "housewife". Stability means that person is there for you. Pakistanis expect women to do all the cooking and cleaning - this is pretty consistent in most households. "Stability" says that the male doesn't have a problem feeding and cleaning after his wife either.
The housewife fetish you call - can be extended to modern day "stability" fetish. People look for stability in marriage, and fun in a one night stand.
People looked for women to make a home with, not to be buddies with, although that is an outcome.
I dont know what part of America your from, but i really havent come across such self-absorbed and hedonistic groups of Pakistani males that you frequently banter about in all threads.
Why focus on a minority group when you dont have to?
We look at things from our own POV. Our own POVs are made up from our upbringing, education, environment, and a few other external factors. When you, as yourself, are good you tend to think of the world as good. Similarly, if you have an open and positive outlook on life, you tend to think that majority has the same outlook. This is reinforced by our friends, as we tend to have friends which have more or less similar ideas as we have.
I believe we definitely will have a large community of males who are self-absorbed and have hedonistic tendencies. In fact, I believe, they will be in majority as majority of us are uneducated and conservatively cultured.
Stability is very different from "housewife". Stability means that person is there for you. Pakistanis expect women to do all the cooking and cleaning - this is pretty consistent in most households. "Stability" says that the male doesn't have a problem feeding and cleaning after his wife either.
I don't agree. Stability comes from understanding of responsibilities. If a husband is working 10 hours a day and his wife is not working and stay-at-home type, it becomes her responsibility to ensure that he gets fed when he comes back. Alternately, it becomes her husbands responsibility to ensure that his wife's, at least, basic needs and desires are met.
However, if the wife is working and husband is not and is stay-at-home type (I know one family), it becomes the responsibility of the male member to provide comfortable environment at home for his spouse. The same conditions as above should now apply to him.
If both are working, then the household duties should be shared and not imposed.
^
I agree somewhat, but there is definitely a tendency to berate at-home work among desi men. My at-work time is fun...I mean this is one facet of modern, white collar work we often fail to account for. :-)
Had I been married, I doubt 8 hours at the office for me would nearly be as stressful as 5 mins wifey would have with a 2 year old.
I think it's fair to admit most desi guys have the "what'd you do all day?" attitude, even though many enjoy their work as I do....
I don't agree. Stability comes from understanding of responsibilities. If a husband is working 10 hours a day and his wife is not working and stay-at-home type, it becomes her responsibility to ensure that he gets fed when he comes back. Alternately, it becomes her husbands responsibility to ensure that his wife's, at least, basic needs and desires are met.
However, if the wife is working and husband is not and is stay-at-home type (I know one family), it becomes the responsibility of the male member to provide comfortable environment at home for his spouse. The same conditions as above should now apply to him.
If both are working, then the household duties should be shared and not imposed.
That's EXACTLY what I'm saying. Pakistanis don't typically agree with your 2nd and 3rd options of power-sharing.