This verse is always interpreted as that men must treat all wives equally - i.e practice justice among the wives.
But, what about justice between wife and husband? Unless the 2nd marriage is with the freely given consent and approval of the first wife, there exists a situation of injustice between husband and wife.
Even if the first wife chooses not to leave because of social/financial pressures or because she has invested too much in the relationship she is still being treated unjustly because the husband acted unilaterally and the wife did not consent.
I believe the above verse prohibits such behavior.
why is it so hard to commit ? well you get bored that is why. I mean my fav food is nihari but if i eat it every day I will be very bored of it too
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Exactly. In this age of information that we currently live in, where everyone lives to please themselves, it is very easy to offend and upset someone. Grey areas are becoming more and more black and white.
These days people get offended if you look at them differently. So, its impossible not to upset women just by the mere thought of being in a polygamous marriage, especially when you state the underlying cause to be that you’re too horny and that she cannot satisfy you anymore, which is such a pathetic excuse.
If you treat women as disposable pleasures, they have every right to not give a f-ck about you, either.
This notion, that women in the west are powerful really depends on the kind of family they have. I've seen countless Pakistani (and Indian) women not being treated well here in the west by their own family members. There are thousands of females in western countries, who are not allowed to make their life choices, not even in marriage. Many females in the UK don't come back to school after holidays, being married off even if they didn't want to. In the Netherlands, I see this especially with Turkish girls. I know many more examples from females of different backgrounds and different ages who are forced in a life they don't even want.. The choice females in the west have to make is unfair; be unhappy for the rest of your life, by doing everything your family demands. Or making your own important life choice, which will make their families angry, even if their own choices are not unislamic.
Yes, there are powerful Muslim females too, fortunately. I'm happy to see them on more and better platforms, but we're not there yet. Lucky are the females who have supportive families. With more examples, I hope more families will stop forcing their females in a life they don't want. There are strong females in Pakistan too. When your own family supports you, no matter where in the world you are, you will be strong and a voice for the rights of other humans.
And marrying more than 1 female in our age, I don't know. The prophet (saww) wasn't happy when the husband of his daughter wanted a second wife. It is difficult for men to treat all wives equally, so it's understandable. In our times, there are enough males to marry a muslim woman (how sad that many also marry underage girls and a lot of those girls have died because of that), so it's not really necessary. In our culture, a second wife is also often used as blackmail, when the first wife doesn't have children immediately or when she doesn't have a son, only daughters. Even though the male is the one that determines the sex of the child, still the wife is blamed. Depending on how horrible a family is, these things still happen in the west to Muslim females.
I'm not saying all men with a second wife are horrible. Second marriage is just used in a very problematic way in our culture which has nothing to do with islam anymore.
I didn’t knew about that before reading your comment so had to do some investigation. While what you wrote is true but that point alone misses out on very important details. The perspective 2nd wife was the daughter of Abu Jahl, an enemy of Allah.
Thanks for sharing. I hear many conflicting stories, some say it's fabricated and Ali (ra) didn't want to marry the daughter of Abu Jahl, others say it's true. Who knows. Ali (ra) didn't marry other females either until his wife passed away. Perhaps his wife didn't want him to marry anyone else during her life, perhaps there were other reasons, who knows.
All this makes me happy with the choices I've made regarding my own marital status. I'm not interested in a husband who only likes a wife for sex, then indulges in his sexual fantasies by marrying another woman, most males in our times don't take a second wife to help society and help the second wife, in most cases it is only lust or the wish to have a son for example, if the first wife didn't produce a son (for which that same male is actually responsible). I know that most males can't be faithful to 1 female for the rest of their life, I've seen the marriages of so many people around me to realise that this is how most males are. Only a rare male will be happy for decades or perhaps even his entire life with 1 female. Even though most males are hypocrites by demanding that females only stay loyal to 1 male for the rest of their lives. They become angry if the wife initiates a divorce. Females get in a lot of trouble even for important life choices such as marriage.
Interesting, while females are fighting for their basic rights, males are fighting for acceptance of marrying as often as possible without society making any judgements.
I want to say, it's nice to share perspectives here. I can't discuss these topics outside of our culture because most people say that every single Pakistani or every single Muslim is like this.