Venting: I'm back to square one with venue :( *long*

Lifestyle Wedding, Fashion & Beauty
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Soooo…we’re planning for a April wedding. Small wedding. We went to several local venues and found a American boutique hotel that we both really liked. For the last 3 weeks…we’ve been back and forth negotiating little details with the catering manager. A LOT of that time was us waiting hear back from HER. But…Thanksgiving is this week and Christmas is around the corner so we were patient. I also have a DJ and a decorator lined up…the only reason we haven’t signed the contract with DJ and decorator is b/c we’re waiting to sign the dam* contract with the venue.

We’ve met with her 3x…all 3 times both fiance and I left work early to meet her. Sooo we met with her on Monday. All of us agreed on everything. Fiance and I were super happy. We told her to send the contract asap b/c we’re ready to sign it and put down deposit. Now keep in mind…catering manager herself told us that the catering office is closed Wednesday(today) through Friday. On Monday…we left her office at 4:30 ish. She told us it takes her like 30 min. to do the contract and she’ll get it to us before she leaves that day.

We finally get the contract around 3:00 p.m. yesterday. The dam* contract didn’t have most of the things that we had agreed on. :grumpy:

Just to give you guys some small examples: She told us she would give us the bridal suite Friday AND Saturday night “complimentary”. On the contract, it stated we’d get a suite (note: didn’t say “bridal” suite) Saturday night only. She told us during Monday’s meeting that for hotel “blocks”…they will block 20 rooms for us that we will not be responsible for if they’re not booked (she OFFERED this info…we didn’t ask for it). Once again…this “detail” was not in the contract. Their “standard outside catering package” states that they will charge 15% of the outside caterers invoice. We had a MUTUAL agreement that instead of 15%…she will charge us a $XX flat fee for “outside catering”. Well guess what the dam* contract stated…the standard 15%! :mad:

Here’s the BIG thing that really blew my mind: Sooo…the “timings” for the 2 room we’re getting (ballroom for reception and smaller room for ceremonies). She wrote down the “event times” on the contract. Example: We told her reception will start at approx. 7:00 p.m. and go on until 2:00 a.m. Well…for the ballroom…she put those times as the “booking time”. Even for the cocktail hour area and the other rooms…she put the start-end times for the events. And 2 pages later…in the “fine print”…it said that if we go outside of the times stated in the contract…the additional “fee” is $350 per hour!!! Ummm…so if my reception starts at 7:00…when the heck are my vendors supposed to set-up!!! :confused: The decorations…DJ…cake?!! Going by this contract…if signed…she can actually charge me $350/hour for that set-up times?! NOWHERE in the contract did it say anything about set-up times for the vendors. :mad:

And to top it all off…BOTH my fiance and my names were misspelled! :smack: And all the things we agreed on…other than the hotel block…everything else is in e-mails SHE sent to us…so its not like we “misunderstood” anything. We agreed on everything verbally and over e-mail…but the contract was totally different. :mad:

So I made edits to the contract and e-mailed it back to her requesting that she make the corrections so that we can sign it. She wrote me back a angry e-mail. She said how this is their “standard wedding contract” and it can not be changed at all. She also said we’re asking for too much blah blah blah. Heck we asked her to put in the stuff that SHE agreed to through e-mail! :grumpy: We weren’t asking for anything outside of what was already agreed to by HER! She ended her e-mail with a line stating that perhaps we should consider another venue that will meet all our requirements blah blah blah.

So we spent weeks going back and forth negotiating about the entire event…and now she’s refusing to put it in the contract! I stopped looking at other venues b/c I thought that’s one thing I was done with! Fiance blew up when he saw the contract she sent us yesterday…AND then her response to my request to “fix” it.

As much as I LOVE this venue…I can’t deal with this. If she’s treating us like this before the contract is signed…I don’t want to find out how she’s going to treat us if we sign it and are “locked in”. And this isn’t some ghetto place…this is a nice, American boutique hotel in middle of the city…is a nice area. Sooooo…guess who’s back to square one when it comes to a venue.

I’m SOOOOOOOO angry and frustrated over this…and a bit depressed. So much for me enjoying this Thanksgiving weekend. Fiance wanted to go to the venue and let her know exactly how he felt but I held him back. I can not believe all that time and effort wasted on this for it to come to this. :disgust: :teary1:

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Re: Venting: I'm back to square one with venue :( long

Are you sure they don't give youa standard couple of hours to set up?

Is there another manager you can contact at the hotel?

Also if you tell us what region you're in, maybe we can help with some venue suggestions.

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Re: Venting: I'm back to square one with venue :( long

paheli: are you dealing with desi person?

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Re: Venting: I'm back to square one with venue :( long

Aren't you glad you're a lawyer

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Re: Venting: I'm back to square one with venue :( long

You should definitely GO BACK TO THE HOTEL! Seriously it's a big deal considering how much she said she would add and then what she actually added! Go back and speak to her saying what she should add like she said and if she says yeah ok then WAIT until she corrects it. If she doesn't speak to someone else..She can't be the manager? She must be like the event organiser?

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Re: Venting: I'm back to square one with venue :( long

I'm sure there is a manager above her to whom you can complain. You can show this manager printouts of the emails she sent highlighting all these extras that she offered. I would do this to get closure, but I would still hesitate to book that same venue especially if that woman would be managing your wedding. It's frustrating, take
some days and calm yourself, but then keep hunting! You'll find something even better!

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Re: Venting: I’m back to square one with venue :frowning: long

Sara: LOL. I honestly don’t know what she was thinking. Do most people just sign these contracts without actually reading it?! LOL. I went through every single word…multiple times…lol. My blood pressure was through the roof by the time I got to the end. :mad: I honestly think she thinks we’re idiots (granted she doesn’t know what fiance & do for a living). Her statement about not being able to edit their “standard contract” is total B.S. :smack: It’s true that the “legal” wording can’t be changed…but you can definately change details of the particular event.

STA: No. The venue is a American boutique hotel (in Galleria). I think the only desi worker we saw there was the hostess at the hotel restaurant.

Sahar: She’s the “senior catering manager” and the person above her is the “director” (The director is the one who will be actually signing the contract on behalf of the hotel. We saw everyone’s names and titles on the contract.

I would think the hotel should allow for a few hours for vendor set-up of the room(this is my 1st wedding so I’ve never had to deal with this before). HOWEVER, the problem for me is that the contract doesn’t say anything about it. Soooo…going by what’s actually written in the contract…legally…yes…they can actually charge me to use the ballroom before 7:00 p.m. (since that’s the “contracted” time…the contract states $350/hour for timing outside that).

I have called some other venues and am waiting to get their proposals. Timining sucks too b/c for Thanksgiving…we’re out of town for the next 5 days. :frowning: And of course…everything else is now totally on hold until I have this figured out.

When I first read the e-mail…even then I choose to calm down and be nice. I responded to her nasty e-mail basicaly saying that MAYBE I misunderstood something. And I asked about the vendor set-up timing (when will they set-up and that fact that I didn’t see anything in the contract about it). I also stated that I was only requesting that she add in what we both had agreed to and am not asking for anything new/extra. No response from her so far. Of course in the evening fiance saw the e-mail and blew up.

Honestly…with her attitude and being treated like this…I don’t think I want my wedding at this venue anymore. It’s not the cheapest venue in town and I don’t think its too much to ask for a little respect when we’re dropping this much $$$. And as a bride, I want to feel like my catering manager is working WITH me to make my event special…not against me! If she’s being this rude and undependable right now…WTH is she going to do once we sign the contract and she knows she’s guaranteed the $$$.

Fiance and I have decided that even though we don’t want the venue anymore…we still plan on letting hotel management know about how we were treated (including her boss the Director). And once I have found a venue and get extra free time…I plan on leaving a “review” about the hotel and their “senior catering manager” on every single website/wedding forum I can find. It’s fine that they don’t want to to negotiate or want more $$$…but don’t be sneaky about it!! And don’t promise people things if you’re not willing to deliver it! People not being upfront is one of my biggest pet peeves. :naraz:

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Re: Venting: I’m back to square one with venue :frowning: long

I agree- let hotel management know. BUT unless they offer some guarantees for the day-of and shape up in terms of their communication, I would consider having your wedding at a different venue. Based on their behaviour now, the last thing you want is for them to act up this way on the actual day of your wedding. Its really not worth the headache. Can you send the director of catering a note on your law firm’s letterhead to emphasize how serious you are about this?

As well, try not to stress too much over this. Sometimes these things happen for really good reasons that don’t emerge until later on- for eg, we hired photographers for our wedding whom we loved and thought were the best ever. One month before the wedding, they demanded an additional $1000 as a “new fee” they had initiated and when we refused to pay up, they cancelled our contract and left us stranded!! Fortunately, and so very, very luckily, this led us to the photographers we did end up hiring who were beyond incredible. It definitely, absolutely worked out for the best in our case and it will in yours too, insha’Allah. Whether it comes in the form of this management giving you an even better deal to apologize, or a fab other venue that will work perfectly for you.

I don’t know if you’ve seen this website, but they have reviews from actual brides on different vendors, including venues. Perhaps this might help you find yours? http://www.weddingwire.com/shared/Search?l=y&cid=11&geo=houston%2C+tx