I'm just wondering how in desi society those who are marrying for visa are looked upon back in Pakistan? Are they still respected and considered as perfect marriage material? I mean if a guy is capable to deceive another human being like that, you can be next. Also these kind of activities makes guys values and morals questionable. I know this topic is very complex, but that's what bugging my mind lately. Also what is your personal opinion about guys like that?
The values and morals are different for Desi in the East and the west
Desi in Pakistan have move forward where else overseas Desi are considered having Nani Dadi Kay zamanay Kay values/morals
I think
I see niqaab and abaya but in Pakistan it’s without dupatta
It is indeed a complex matter but largely I do not see any problem with men who marry for immigration benefits as long as that is not their only motivation. They should have realistic expectations from the girl and her family. There are guys who came from overseas and do not work at all while their wives work despite having health problems. Some such guys enrolled in some useless course to pass free time. So as long as the guy understands that life abroad is not as easy as seen on TV and is able to take responsibility with little bit of help from the girl and her family, I see no problem.
Welcome to GS, White Flower
<— (here’s a pink flower, lol)
There are good and bad people everywhere and Pakistan is not any different. No human being, irrespective of the country they reside in, likes to be deceived or taken advantage of. In the game of marriage, both men and women seek a partner that will enrich their lives in various ways. Most likely you will not marry a guy that does not have a stable job or a degree, etc etc. Both parties look at pros and cons in a prospect. The problem arises when a person’s motivation for marriage is mainly superficial and if they don’t understand and honor the responsibilities that come with it. A nikkah contract is just a piece of paper for some people. They don’t understand the gravity of that contract, that it is sacred, and that it’s a transfer of guardianship from one wali (the father) to another (the husband). And a wali by definition is someone who is a friend and protector; so someone who will fulfill responsibilities and do right by you (and vice versa). As mentioned above, there’s a difference between a guy who is just looking for a golden ticket to go abroad and a guy who is hardworking and sees it as an opportunity to better provide for himself and his spouse/family. Not every guy will be the same. It all comes down to a person’s character (maturity, sincerity, etc).
Thanks, Redvelvet
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Actually I agree with you and DecentGuy as everyone has their long list of things what they want to see in their future spouse and possible things what comes in bonus after marriage. Why immigration benefits would be an exception? Your marriage is basically your future and Islam does not prohibit to marry someone for wealth,but it should be respected as it’s sacred and very responsible thing to do. And yeah, some men (if they even deserves to be called men) don’t see the meaningfulness of marriage contract and the damage what they are doing to a woman who they are choosing as a victim. I’m talking more of those men who knows right at the beginning , they will leave the girl as soon as they will sort out papers and will marry someone else chosen by their family or themselves, who knows. In some extreme cases they will even make sure their chosen woman gives birth to a baby, so sorting out his immigration matters would be even easier and not caring about them later on.
Batameez post says some truth as well, because, let’s face it, those who are coming from Pakistan are quite famous marrying for visa. I wonder what makes those guys so desperate or just capable knowingly to ruin girls and sometimes life of other people too? Is it just poverty or is it simply pure greed as you keep hearing cases where husband works hard, but all the money goes back home and wife can go and support herself, kids and husband too. He will contribute unwillingly, because family back home is asking money to support themselves and pay their servants at those houses. Of course, this kind of wife can look at this thing from and angle where she seems such and angel helping this ‘poor’ people chain. But the thing is, she wasn’t aware of that before. Ant let’s not even mention those guys who are actually keeping secret wives in west and from western wife in east.
[quote=““White flower””]
I’m just wondering how in desi society those who are marrying for visa are looked upon back in Pakistan? Are they still respected and considered as perfect marriage material?
[/quote]
They are looked upon as ‘lucky’. And once they ditch their wives after gaining residency, they are usually in high demand in Pakistan.
**Reminds me of this one guy from Kenya who came to Hawaii and married an American Lady then left her, leaving behind a son!
well it did not turn out too bad for her and her child now did it?**
Restored attachments:
Those men who bail soon after getting their immigration deserve to burn in hell with mandatory insertion of a watermelon up their southern most orifice every five minutes.

