Re: updates !!!
yest thats what i meant......
the girl's mom needs some 'issue' in order to 'advise' about.........once the couple is away from home.....she wouldn't have those.........and the girl's actual self will show...and they will be able to judge how much of a problem is the girl and how much her mom.....
Well the OP said they were hopeful when her bro said he was going abroad as they expected him to take his wife along and maybe being away from all the family would allow things to change. However, he's rightly worried about doing that because it's going to be very difficult if she's the same there and instead of him getting some breathing space it will be more stress.
OP, the confrontation is going to happen. I still stick by what I said before, that your bother really should discuss this with your FIL first without his wife and daughter present who could say all manner of things, which is going to make it difficult for your bro to make his point. However, talk to your brother first and if he wants to give this marriage a go, tell him that the best way in the current situation is for the two of them to go abroad to give it a chance. If nothing changes there, he knows where he stands. Once he has explained the current situation to his FIL, he should tell him that if his daughter wants to give the marriage a proper chance, he is prepared for the two of them to immediately go abroad for some time so they can have a fresh start AND his FIL needs to ensure that his wife backs off completely. If they refuse... again, your brother knows where he stands.
Right...living independently does seem like the best option what with the interference involved
I have seen a situation exactly like this in my family.
The girl was from a good family but she had alot of interference from both her father and mother and in this case her father would give her 'bad advice'
However. Now i am just decribing what happened in my family i am NOT saying you are doing this. But the guy in the situation he used to tell every minor detail of his marriage to his sisters and his sisters developed resentment against their bhabi, their bhabi started to behave even more badly and the sisters all disliked the bhabi even more.
As a result the bhabi left and the marriage unfortunately broke down.
A few months later it was found out the everyone was unhappy with the girl because she 'had no interest in the home' and the girl said that, due to her upbringing, she never had to look after the home she had never been expected to so it was a shock to her when she got married to have all these expectations and she found the transition from single uni life to bhabi bahu with these expectations and lots of nands on her case horrible so she would lash out, maybe if she had been given alot of love and support and shown how to slowly look after the home and if people from allllllll sides stopped intefering so much things would have been different.
Im not saying this is the case in the OP situation but it is another perspective on things.
interesting you're right there is an another perspective on things, but I would like to ask just one question, zaroori hai ke jo ek karta hai woh dusra bhi kare? i mean if ur husband is making the mistake of involving the women in his house in his marriage, and you can see that that involvement is wreaking havoc in your marriage, is it necessary for you to make the same mistake? can you not see that if you involve more ppl (his family is already involved now u r involving additional people: your family) then you're just asking for trouble?
and by you i mean her not you lol :p
