Hellow everyone.. I’m new here.. Joined because of something thats really worrying me.. I am to get married in the coming year.. My fiance’s family ways and traditions are very different from ours. We dont have the system of carrying decorated baskets or mayoons and dholkis and all that. Can anyone explain these customs to me?.. What does a girl’s side have to do before, during and after the wedding… I need to know in detail.. Can anyone explain please…
Re: Upcoming wedding
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Upcoming wedding
Just curious are you Pakistani? You can buy all these items. Is it necessary that you must reciprocate all these traditions if your family doesn't really do them usually? I will come back in a bit to explain some of those traditions.
Re: Upcoming wedding
I actually was worried about the same thing- it seemed that my fiance's family was going all out with many rasms and functions, while mine is very simple. I found that the best thing to do was when my parents and his sat down to finalize shaadi dates, to also talk about which functions/rasms we wanted to have and what was expected from each side in terms of gifts, etc. This made things so much easier and cleared up lots of confusion. The decorated baskets are usually what contain the gifts for the bride, and for my engagement my fiance's family got the baskets from an art store like Michael's and wrapped everything nicely themselves. This is not required at all, but I think it's something that is done in Pakistan so they wanted to carry that tradition. The mayoun is also not required, but lots of people like to do it- I think it's a small function that signifies the start of the wedding festivities. A dholki (function where a dholki drum is played with dancing and music) can also happen at the mayoun...I gave very vague descriptions of what you asked about, but the main thing is none of these are required. Your wedding and festivities are whatever you and your fiance want them to be. What your side is responsible for depends on the particular traditions your family has and his as well- it's different for different families. I know I'm responsible for the mehndi, getting his outfit for the shaadi and my own outfit, and his family is responsible for the valima and both of our outfits for the valima too. Dholkis can be held from either side. Let me know if you have any other questions, this answer was pretty jumbled and all over the place but I tried my best haha!
Re: Upcoming wedding
Thanks!.. Yeah, I'm kinda half pakistani... What i actually want to know is, what things would be expected from us normally. Like, i know we are supposed to arrange the furniture and things... what has to be given to the groom, apart from the clothes and stuff that'll be worn on the events? And when and how r these things taken.. I know things will be different in different families. I just want a general idea...