I guess you have to be a little astute and love freedom and your country to catch on this piece written by a fellow compatriot. Read on:
What is the fuss about?
WHAT is the problem with people in Pakistan? Why are they protesting, albeit half-heartedly? And why are newspaper editorials and columnists so worried about the political situation in the country? Like the worthy president, I fail to understand what the fuss is about.
The president has very kindly restored your Constitution. What would you have done if, instead of being increasingly benevolent to the people, he had refused to restore it? He even made several amendments to the Constitution before restoring it so that in case there is another troublesome situation in the country, things can be put right without going through a lot of trouble, as he had to in October 1999.
The way our political leaders continue to disagree with each other, which of course is such a bad thing for the country’s unity, would it ever have been possible for them to gather a two-thirds majority in parliament to make such far-reaching and sweeping amendments? Poor souls, these politicians. Like politicians all over the world, they hold differing views on issues. Don’t they realise that Pakistan is different from the rest of the world and requires politicians who should behave properly and agree on all issues of national importance because Pakistan comes first?
The president knows how naïve the politicians are. That is why he had to take matters in his own firm and safe hands and do the right thing. He ordered the Constitution to ‘pause’, just as we press a button to pause a movie, made all the necessary changes to give him the powers to do more right things as and when necessary in the future, and then pressed the ‘play’ button so that the country would start playing from the same point as if nothing had happened. And during the brief ‘pause’ he solved all the difficult problems of the nation which politicians of other countries take decades to resolve, and which politicians of Pakistan are never able to solve.
The president knows of course that whoever wins in the coming elections, the politicians of Pakistan will never be able to undo his amendments. In Pakistan, you need the iron hand of a general to get things done, for Pakistan is different from the rest of the world. So what’s the fuss about?
As a matter of fact the president has solved another problem our politicians keep jabbering about: the role of the army in politics. Some say civilians should be ‘friends’ with the army; others say that the generals should serve under the civilians (however laughable this notion may seem), while still others say that a Pakistani president should always be a general (believers in this school of thought must have been mightily depressed when the president relinquished his uniform).
Many other formulae like the Security Council and a formal ‘troika’ have been seriously discussed among the bright intellectuals of the country.
The ‘mother of problems’ has finally been solved. In future there will be no need to impose martial law or to follow it with referendums and legal magic to declare that everything done during this period “is deemed to have been done rightly and constitutionally”.
Nor shall our elected representatives need to play games like the 8th and 17th amendments. The process has been made simple: whenever the chief of army staff feels that things are not going right for the country and that either the politicians or the judiciary are not behaving properly, he can push the pause button on the Constitution, put everything right, including the incorrigible judges, make necessary and useful changes in the Constitution and press the play button to restart the country smoothly on the right ‘democratic’ path.
Is this not such a blissful feeling to know that you are in safe hands? Does it not feel good to know that you are being watched by the kind gods themselves, and that they will make sure that you are always safe and sound? I am transposed to my school days, when we all knew instinctively that whatever the frequency or magnitude of the mischief we brought about, our teachers or parents will always be there to put things right.
What more could Pakistanis ask for? All their problems have been solved for them while they sat smugly in their homes. In other countries like Nepal and Georgia, people have to come out on the streets and get shot. Here they get everything on a platter and yet they are ungrateful? Count the blessings that they have obtained free of cost: democracy, which was about to be derailed has been put firmly back on the rails, the three pillars of state — the judiciary, executive and legislature — which were showing signs of dangerously independent thinking and tendencies of going astray have been brought in complete harmony, while the so-called fourth pillar, the media, has been cut to size and is now behaving like a good child.
Elections are happening without the usual messy noises and rowdyism; the Constitution is ‘on’ again; there is no emergency; all the major political parties are taking part; and the most important blessing will be bestowed upon the nation when the winning politicians take oath on the Constitution.
That day they will automatically validate all the myriad nice things that the gods have done to their country and its special brand of democracy.
Have they ever seen such benevolence in decades? The last time it happened was way back in 1962, when Ayub doffed his uniform and became a civilian president. Ungrateful Pakistanis. Would the ruling junta of Myanmar, to quote one example, even consider bestowing such favours upon their subjects?