I dunno what to say, but this is just too damn funny.
U.S. Gave Bunch of Money To Some Guy Pretending To Be Taliban Leader
by [Jack Stuef](http://wonkette.com/author/jackstuef/)
by [Jack Stuef](http://wonkette.com/author/jackstuef/)
11:57 pm November 22, 2010
[33 Comments](http://wonkette.com/430837/u-s-gave-bunch-of-money-to-guy-taliban#idc-container) 512 Views
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If Afghans had electricity, televisions, or video cameras that were not trained on people exploding in piles of rocks, they would now also have their own Punk’d. According to “a Western diplomat,” some random guy let the America and its coalition friends know that he was Mullah Akhtar Muhammad Mansour, a very important Taliban leader. This man had many important negotiations with the people currently in charge of waging constant war in that country, and was given lots of money for agreeing to talk. So things were going smoothly! But then somebody who had actually seen Mansour before showed up to one of these meetings and told officials the guy they thought was Mansour looks nothing like him. Whoops! The Western diplomat said the Afghan man was initially given a sizable sum of money to take part in the talks — and to help persuade him to return.
While the Afghan official said he still harbored hopes that the man would return for another round of talks, American and other Western officials said they had concluded that the man in question was not Mr. Mansour. Just how the Americans reached such a definitive conclusion — whether, for instance, they were able to positively establish his identity through fingerprints or some other means — is unknown.
As recently as last month, American and Afghan officials held high hopes for the talks. Senior American officials, including Gen. David H. Petraeus, said the talks indicated that Taliban leaders, whose rank-and-file fighters are under extraordinary pressure from the American-led offensive, were at least willing to discuss an end to the war.
So let us get this straight: It is a sign of strength that America will throw piles of money at any old crazy person on the street who says he’s a Taliban leader willing to talk peace. It is because America is putting extraordinary pressure on the Taliban with our huge missiles that our nation is so desperate to work out a peaceful compromise with the former leadership of Afghanistan we promised to annihilate.
Look, if Afghanistan is just going to slowly fall in the hands of an amalgamation of Taliban and other varied strongmen, as it seems to be doing, why not just sign off on it right now? The U.S. is powerless to stop Karzai’s corruption. Baby Republican and Baby Democrat franchises do not seem to be popping up in the country. At some point we will talk ourselves into just letting this happen. So let’s just drop in Ashton Kutcher to run the thing, cut and run out of there, and leave the Afghan warlords to take care of him. Two birds with one stone: That annoying dumb guy is dead, and we have someone on which to blame this ridiculously long and increasingly pointless war.
And guess what? The Taliban probably won’t try to support anti-American terrorists anymore, because they saw the headache that brought them the last time. And wasn’t that our objective in the first place?
Re: U.S. Gave Bunch of Money To Some Guy Pretending To Be Taliban Leader
^^ That is funny
on serious note, it does prove how inexperienced and desperate Americans are to get out of this region.. i think they will get out of here once the sales target of the Ammunition & warfare suppliers are met..
Intelligence or lack thereof: Negotiating with an imposter
Height of un-intelligence! Can ya believe it? Please just tell me how much of the hard earned American Taxpayers dollars are being literally given away to “negotiators” who are oh-so-easily able to circumnavigate the supreme intelligence that is CIA.
Now for the actual bit:
WASHINGTON (AFP) – A man claiming to be a leading Taliban negotiator in secret talks with Afghan officials was actually faking, The New York Times reported Tuesday in the latest setback to efforts to end the war. For months, the** high-level meetings backed by NATO** appeared to be showing progress if only because of the purported participation of Mullah Akhtar Mohammed Mansour, one of the most senior Taliban commanders.
But it now seems the talks have achieved little and US officials have given up hope the man was either Mansour or even a Taliban leader at all, the Times said.
“It’s not him,” a Western diplomat in Kabul intimately involved in the talks told the newspaper. “And we gave him a lot of money.”
NATO and Afghan officials told the Times that they had met three times with the fake Taliban leader, who came from Pakistan, where Taliban leaders have taken cover.
He was even flown to Kabul on a NATO aircraft and ushered into the presidential palace to meet with Afghan President Hamid Karzai, who has appealed to the Taliban to come to the negotiating table.
I do believe it is time for NATO and American Intelligence to back off and let those who know the terrain, culture, and history of the region take control of the situation. No, not “democratic” India. Rather, Pakistan, and Iran.
It should have been Pakistan representation in Lisbon giving NATO the instructions and dictation on what not to do, and what the best option for them is at this point. But again, as the saying goes, some learn and some learn it the hard way. For reference, consult Russia.
Lets hope for the best, and wish the next honest dollar is not spent on a goose chase based on a hunch from faulty intelligence. George must be laughing his head off at the ranch. Mr. Obama, this is happening on your watch! What will you do?
what are they, jokers or what?
and they claim to operate drones based on intelligence, when they are not even sure who they are talking to and paying him “a lot of money” and transporting him in their own military plan, how in the hell they are going to know who they are going to hit with those missiles??? that really makes sense when 70% of those drone attacks kill only innocent civilians, i say it may be even higher, probably 90%
IF, and its a big if, this whole episode was faked by themselves, just to make some goodwill among their public (US/NATO etc) then after this shameless revelation i dont think their public is still going to support this war or negotiation anymore
there should be an unconditional withdraw, starting as early as possible
Re: U.S. Gave Bunch of Money To Some Guy Pretending To Be Taliban Leader
Maybe , now we should ask madam Secretary of State Clinton, that with so much resources spent on intelligence how is this possible. Just like she told us when she was visiting Pakistan, that someone in the Pakistani government knows where OBL is hiding.
Re: U.S. Gave Bunch of Money To Some Guy Pretending To Be Taliban Leader
Looks like people in 'intelligence' have stopped munching almonds, from 45-minutes to WMD to nothing, I am sure there have been far many more blunders by the so called intelligence, some do make it to the day-light and many don't because of cover-ups or lack of any coverage.
Re: U.S. Gave Bunch of Money To Some Guy Pretending To Be Taliban Leader
USA is throwing money around in general, like old bread to packs of dogs. Some go to good dogs and some are snatched by not so good ones.
What difference does it make whether it is musharaf or kiyani and zardari and co that took it or karzai and alibaba and fake haqqani buddies? They're all the same ferment fighting for their morsels.