This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)

[soconfused]

Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)

@inspiron

In response to stoppit and puchi kuchi.

In our first few text messages exchanges - i asked him ‘so what do you do for work? do you enjoy it? ’ and his reply via text was ’ so you gonna take my interview like your dad’ and then I told him i was watching an arabic film or something later on and he said ’ yalllah so this is what med school has done to you? i have 0 recommendations for that rubbish ’

hence i thought oh hes really jokey AND can take a joke - well I guess not …or he just doesn’t get it?

I said to him oh sorry british people are really ironic and asked him to bear with me so lets see what happens.

Yes the working from 8-10pm and the watching foortball from 11 am to 12 pm on sunday and the fantasy football sounds a little hardcore.

We share the common interest of really wanting to travel and eating out etc though.

Lets see what happens.

He sounds like he was being serious about the arab movie and it wasn’t a joke.

@ABC1111

Sounds like a guy who gets easily flared up/anger management issues.

I’m getting the same vibes. Boy seems to have a stick up his butt…

@firenze

1. he is not very friendly and neither have many friends.

2. Yeh like in next two years i will be CEO.

3. ask him for maiden name/dob/ssn and run a background check, voila

I find the workaholic thing really odd. I have a few friends in consultancy and they work 80+ hours a week…so if he thinks that he’s gonna ease up on the schedule, he’s probably wrong. And a workaholic by nature will find ways to spend time at work whether he’s a CEO or a grocer…it has more to do with personality than the job.

@Paheli00

If you’re planning on practicing here in the U.S., depending on the specialty you choose to go into, you have the potential to make a VERY good income…probably much higher than him. So $ isn’t a huge issue in this situation.

But the fact that he stays at work until 9:00 p.m. b/c he has nothing else to do is something you should look into more. I know plenty of single people and most don’t do that. They hang out with friends or have other hobbies that keep them occupied outside of the office. Try to find out more about his social life and what he does outside of the office.

@X2

inspiron- They biggest thing that seems off is the social aspect. hate to say it but all day fantasy football is very loser-ish, I mean there are football fans, and then there are people who do fantasy football, and then there are people who are really into fantasy football. That coupled with staying at work late because there is nothing to do after work… whats the deal, no friends? no interests? it looks off..to me it screams socially awkward. Maybe I am wrong and he is quirky in some aspects which is all kosher, but these few things are not adding up.

you need to get a better idea of what the rest of his life is like. med students doing residencies and putting in killer hours, investment bankers working late, and consultants killing themselves at work is known, but then they do go out and socialize as well..**this fantasy football marathon is just one step above all night dungeon and dragon game in wizard outfit. **

I am very sorry I have to say it, and the only reason I am saying it is that someone else at one time was getting involved with this guy with the personality of a wet sponge, charisma of a bread box and social savvy of a pothole. I could not bring myself to point these obvious red flags to her and well she was so happy and in love that she went for him, and is fairly unhappy. the guy has turned up to be everything I was concerned about that he would be. I wish I had stepped up and offered unsolicited advise and maybe she would not be trying to make do living with a total tool. Thus overdoing it a bit here i guess.

agree with both these people. The fantasy football stuff is a redflag for me because I don’t know any grown men that are so obsessed with it. I know guys that love love football/cricket/etc (includig my brother) but it’s a SOCIAL thing for them. They’ll go out and play TOGETHER or watch games in huge groups. It’s not one of those things they do alone.

And you seem like someone that likes going out. This guy, from the description, seems like he doesn’t. Especially given the fact you’re having to adjust to a new country/working environment, it’d be nice to have someone that enjoys a night out on the town. Nothing too crazy, but a way for you to meet people and what not. But if homeboy is too busy holed up in his room with fantasy football or at the office, that’s going to be a tough adjustment.

I think you should give this guy a chance and dont’ write it off immediately but there’s something odd about the thing’s he’s saying. He’s the epitome of antisocial and awkward to me from what I’ve read. I have friends that are doctors/in med school/engineers/lawyers/in the finance industry and they enjoy their time off. They don’t run to the office even IF they have nothing to do at home–because usually they have SOMEONE to hang out with and relax.