Things That Can Drive A Sane Person Insane:

· The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper that never works.

· There are always one or two ice cubes that won’t pop out of the
tray.

· You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little
plastic tag in the middle of them.

· The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the
back of your ankle.

· The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.

· There’s always a car riding your tail when you’re slowing down
to find an address.

· You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.

· There’s a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING!

· You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.

· Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the
mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.

· You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a
cigarette.

· You slice your tongue licking an envelope.

· Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you’re trying to
get a reading.

· A station comes in brilliantly when you’re standing near the
radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.

· You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire
laundry comes out covered with lint.

· The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian
finish crossing.

· A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with
your filling.

· You set the alarm on your digital clock for 7 PM instead of 7
am.

· You rub on hand cream and can’t turn the bathroom doorknob to
get out.

· Your glasses slide off your ears when you perspire.

· You can’t look up the correct spelling of a word in the
dictionary because you don’t know how to spell it.

· You have to inform five different sales people in the same
store that you’re just browsing.