is their behaviour in trying times.
True? False?
Yet we ask people to make decisions about whether or not to spend their lives with someone while we are exposed to only the best of times…
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
True!
my question is: is there an alternative to the rishta process already in place?
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
TRUE...urdu meN kahte haiN k Ghusse kii Haalat men jo jaisaa bartaao kartaa hai vo shaKhs hoo-ba-hoo vaisaa hii hotaa hai...Ghusse pe qaaboo rakhnaa mard-e-momin kii pahchaan hai! **:)**
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
Is there a better alternative ?
Even if someone has been in courtship for many years it will be difficult to observe someone under pressure. For the entire length of courtship the other party might not get hit with any trying time.
It is is not a military's selection process where they subject you to all kinds of tests before they recruit you.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
^LOL...
Yeah unfortunately, it doesn't exist unless we freely allow dating but then we risk other things like losing morals, out of wedlock pregnancies, breakups, and it will be like an avalanche of bad habits that will be picked up on the way.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
Dont they say that if you want to see someone's real side, have a meal with them or go out on a journey with them?
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
^ I was about to write the same. it is a saying by Hazrat Ali (RA) as far as i remember.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
^^... hain... woh kaisay?
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
Maybe because not many people can pretend to be somoone else during travel. Their worst side comes out when going through the fatigue of traveling.
Also, you can see someone's eating manners during a meal.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
Its easy peasy being happy and smiley during happy times.
The test is the hard times, thats when the losers are separated from the genuine nice people in the friendship, relationship etc category.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
^Is this Hazrat Ali's quote? Interesting. But fatigue would be there when the journey is too long otherwise smooth criminals get away with the act of being very nice despite the fatigue :p
Eating manners don't define the entire personality. Yes they can tell a little about hygiene, ettiquets but that would be about it. What else could be inferred from eating habits.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
^Is this Hazrat Ali's quote? Interesting. But fatigue would be there when the journey is too long otherwise smooth criminals get away with the act of being very nice despite the fatigue :p
Eating manners don't define the entire personality. Yes they can tell a little about hygiene, ettiquets but that would be about it. What else could be inferred from eating habits.
Because its an old quote, I think it was more true for that time when a travel from one city to the nearest city would take whole day.
Eating manners do tell a lot about the person, I guess
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
is their behaviour in trying times.
True? False?
Yet we ask people to make decisions about whether or not to spend their lives with someone while we are exposed to only the best of times......
I think the "See how he treats his juniors" is still the best :)
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
**Eating manners do tell a lot about the person, I guess
**like what...? since he/she knows how to eat, i can spend the rest of my life with him/her...??
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
There's a famous saying which I always go by when judging a person's character. It's watching how he/she behaves with those who are socially and economically less fortunate than him/her, rather than watching their behaviour with those of equal standing. It says a lot about a person.
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
As for the quote by Hazrat Ali which people are referring to, it is incomplete above.
To know a person you should have fulfilled these following rules
Either travelled with them
Had money dealings with them
Lived with them
These three instances tell us a lot about a person. That was the quote in question
Re: The True Test of a Person's Character......
I think to an extent it is true. There are people who adhere to moral values during trying times....and those that lose sight of things. It's also said that a true friend is one that is there for you even during troubled times.
But when it comes to deciding whether or not you want to spend your life with someone........how many people are mentally/emotionally ready to even consider marriage when they're feeling overwhelmed with other various issues?