Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
I didnt do it and in my family we generally dont.
I say stay away from such practices as all they do is create a bigger distance between you and the right thing to do.
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
feeding the bird is a noble gesture. but doing it as a wedding ritual is for the lack of some good word , nonsense.
hang a bird feeder somewhere where birds can feed on it. You can make a bird feeder out of a plastic container by making holes on corner and tying it with some thread. 
nice idea. 
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
Don't do it...this is against Islam....Throwing rice over your head THINKING IT"S GOING TO make your life easy is a sin, only Allah can make your life easy, and when you do something like that it's called shirk, and shirk is a major sin.... Educate your mom abt what Islam has to say about such traditions...yes it takes time to understand these concepts, when for generation they've been done..so don't expect your mom to understand it the first time you tell her...I'm sure after 5-6 years she'll careless.
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
Its a hindu rasam . . . why you even wana do that ?
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
sounds funny and totally out of islam even the modern version ... imo ;)
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
Good that you didn’t post this in PA section, you would of been labeled a tribal. 
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
I've heard/maybe read that throwing rice stands for fertility. It's done so that the bride and groom will have children.
I know some people throw flowers instead of rice. Don't know if it has the same meaning as throwing rice.
^But when you consider the saying "sada suhagan raho...phoolo phalo"....(GAG...that saying annoys me).....maybe throwing "phool" has something to do with this saying.
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
I wouldn’t do it… I would totally argue with my mom about it and make her see reason.
My MIL asks me to do certain things and I just say yes yes and my husband tells her yeah yeah, she did it so as to not make her angry… but I don’t do anything I don’t agree with… karnay sai behtar hai tell a white lie. Its easier arguing with mom, but can’t with MIL :hinna:
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
Hmmm…I haven’t seen the rice throwing rasam as much recently…but its a good way to throw rice at an evil MIL 
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
My MIL is very sweet, not at all evil… but some things she believes in and asks me to do 
from good of your heart, isn’t this not tribal? 
DO it JUST for your mom’s happiness!
you know how she told you to “go around you head a few times”…do that at home..put them in a bag…and then go through in over your head…
You dont have to do it somewhere where you see a lot of birds… sometimes there are birds at a beach, pond, or parks..You dont see alot of them togetehr but they do come there…
And if there are no trees, parks or beaches in your area then go to the marketplace at night and do it!
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
imagine if a grain goes in someone's eye...or like they have pumps on n it goes in their shoe...eeeeee. or down their shirt : O
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
^:omg:
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
Farrah,
my in-laws had the whole rice throwing rasam at theirs. It was horrible, the rice fall to the floor and I'm sure that some people even stepped on it.
I didn't see the relevance of the rasam to our wedding, and made my point afterwards stating that when my younger brother-in-law gets married we would not be having rasams that clearly do not signify anything to do with Islam. Turns out the rasam was Hindu based, so I think my father-in-law was more willing to listen to me.
If you don't do the rasam with bird food will it make a difference to your family? Will your mum not let you off by saying you missed the moment and you cannot recreate your wedding or something along those lines?!
If your mum is only made happy by you doing the whole throwing thing maybe you could look at doing the rasam in a park (as other posters said)??
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
No one would ever let me throw away rice! If my Dadi was alive she would have had a fit at the idea. She always said that each grian of rice had a farishta (angel) sitting on it so we had to be every careful in washing, cooking and eating rice so that no grains (cooked or uncooked) go to waste.
I did not throw rice but there was a custom in the susral where you had to do something with rice. My MIL had a small decorated steel pot filled with rice that she emptied on a dupatta in my lap and did that 7 times. Later, she gave away the rice to a masi. Problem solved! No rice thrown away! Everyone happy!
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati …
I threw rice at my rukhsati…I think.
Didn’t know any better and frankly didn’t care and didn’t have all these deep moral thoughts running through my mind (in fact the opposite).
Re: the rice throwing thing at rukhsati ...
give the rice sack to some donation organization such as helping hands, HDF edhi or anyone. and tell your mother that you did exactly what she asked for.
sometimes you cant just explain your parents.
:k: