Re: The Proper way ?
I have this question in my mind for a while. I feel really bad for the OP in the above thread.Feeling Devastated/Broken
I didnt wana post my question in the same thread out of fear that i might hurt the posters feelings. I really do feel bad for her. This doesnt apply to Nightingale , but i will use her case as an example later.
What if husband doesnt think his wife is putting any effort to save the marriage. I know a case where husband is almost fed up wife, he thinks his wife is doing everything to emotionally hurt him. He claims that he wants to discuss problems but he cant. He wants her to change few things in their life. He goes if i tell her to do something nicely, she ignores it. If he tells her something with anger she gets in the same tone. If he trys to make a logical argument, she gets into the argument of why he thinks her mentality is so low. (what ever that means)
Now One day he goes that “kisi din demagh kaharab ho jaey ga aur mera is larki per hath uth jaey ga”. I told him not to do that. That is obviously wrong answer. then he goes, what is he suppose to do? Now at this point I cant even tell him to talk to her coz thats not helping them.
He tells me that now when she does something wrong, he doesn’t yell or get angry at her, he just stops talking to her. His wife probably is thinking key choti moti mamoli fight hai, but its not. Soon he might end up divorcing her. She might be shocked, it was all fine “choti moti laraiaan hoti thieen and all in sudden divorce kesay ho gai”. Its not all in sudden for sure. That cud be somthing that happened in nightingales case. He was probably quiet from outside and not from inside.
What is a husband suppose to do in such cases. If he phsically or verbally abuses her HE IS DEFINITELY WRONG. IF he stays quiet and one day hands her the divorce papers he is still wrong. What other options does he have ?
These are not the only two options in solving a problem. There is something called sitting down with the other person and calmly discussing such matters. If both were mature enough to marry, then both should be mature enough to solve things amicably, as adults.