Husband thinks you were desperate in marrying him, your impatient maybe a little frustrared in genreal isnot very loving or warm towards you . Your mil and sil dont seem happy the husband is living with friends does not have a place nd his parents are basically telling him to take his time to find one and he kind of is. Given you had a nikkah and rukhsatu abroad . Your living with your parents at home They think you were greedy in marrying him and he is fincaically more settled yet middle class. But your a student so its not like your going nowhere.
this is how they saw you yet thy went ahead with the marriage and before marriage no one can read anyones mind and pick up they were being percieved as this.
you have genreally discussed your concerns even went ahead to say you think this is a mismatch and you hope you guys are not really that different to which nothing reassuring was said it was more like i hope what your thinking is not right.
he seems to be making no real effort in getting to know you. He also thinks your emotional and a bit stupid.
how does one deal with this?
and yes this guy does not have a visa but a job in the country you are a national of.
He lives far away from you while you are living with your parents. He is not employed. He does not have a place of his own. He thinks you’re emotional and dumb and has no interest in knowing you. His family also doesn’t like you and they’ve all ganged up against you. Peechay reh kya gaya?
You can attempt speaking to him in a non-emotional way. But if despite all your efforts he still refuses to communicate properly with you, then I think that your parents should intervene and speak with him and his family about what their intentions are for this marriage and what their expectations are of you and vice versa. If they till don’t give you a hopeful response then maybe it’s better to cut your losses. Better to do this early then much later on in the game. Zindagi bhar ronay se behtar hai k banda aik hi dafa achi tarha se ro le.
[quote=““The Last Straw””]
He lives far away from you while you are living with your parents. He is not employed. He does not have a place of his own. He thinks you’re emotional and dumb and has no interest in knowing you. His family also doesn’t like you and they’ve all ganged up against you. Peechay reh kya gaya?
You can attempt speaking to him in a non-emotional way. But if despite all your efforts he still refuses to communicate properly with you, then I think that your parents should intervene and speak with him and his family about what their intentions are for this marriage and what their expectations are of you and vice versa. If they till don’t give you a hopeful response then maybe it’s better to cut your losses. Better to do this early then much later on in the game. Zindagi bhar ronay se behtar hai k banda aik hi dafa achi tarha se ro le.
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Why does he think iam dumb and emotional and how do i talk to him in a non emotional way ?
i dont get it how is marriage not a big deal for people like this like is not he making a joke of his own life here as well?
I recall the time out of college when I had no job. It was just paltry 6 months, but, man that time was hard on me. I was trying to find my place in the world as a man. I had no interest in knowing anyone. All other talk appeared shallow and emotional. I don?t k ow of that?s his mindset now.
Second I see in your posts that you always seem to put yourself down, you doubt yourself a lot and others. If you do that constantly, you program other people to put you down as well.
Thank you for saying this! I give you the flaaver.
She does put herself down. She questions and doubts everything under the sun, moon and stars. Every few weeks she returns to ask if it is too old for marriage, if it’s too old or late for a career or education, or she will describe a troubled rishta scenario and ask if it is normal. Always the same story. Never I have seen her do haseee mazaak in the threads or have halki phulki chat. Everything is too, too serious for her. So if this is her usual pattern over here then how does she act in real life with her husband and others? Wesay tbh the husband here does sound like a loozzer man-child who wasn’t ready for marriage even if his wife was the girl of his dreams. Munnay k parents shouldn’t have gotten him married when he wasn’t settled in life and when they knew he didn’t want to get married.
For a woman (and much more for a “sensitive” one) it is extremely difficult putting up with an emotionally unavailable man.
Get out of this marriage now before it’s too late.
