This is related to my thread regarding mothers…
As in subcontinent, family politcs is always present in our lives. So the following questions for you. 
**1. How much helpful your mother is, when you need counsel regarding family politics. Specially coping with inlaws. (if you are not married, then your views/predictions–How much you will rely on her.)
You can answer using the scale from 1–10.
1 being poor , 10 being excellent.
ye ho kia raha hay 
itnay savalaat woh bhee aise paycheeda gharelu mozoaat pe 
r u taking surveys for the ministry of social welfare 
^ r u joking! maan koa toa mai patti parhati hoon, warna to wo bilkul duffer hai, muun basoor kay baith jati hai. 
ghulail u r a GIRL???
^ for some not-so-explicable reason i thot yr urdu was good. dont tell me i need to tell u muzakkir muannis kaa farq as well.
bibi yeh cafe-chill nahi hai
Faltoo baat karogi tu jurmana kardoonga 
Merey sawaloon ka jawab do, tum pehley pichley test main fail ho chuki ho, Nalaaiq 
ghuLail
Can you please answer using the scales and a little bit explaination thanks
Code Red nai deti reply and why have i failed the previous test
OK lemi reply 
no i will try never to discuss my gharelu masaail with anyone and i’ll try to keep em within the house. INSHALLAH.
second question. mein kyun bataon
GHULAIL so u r a girl or no? seedha seedha reply karo na 
Re: The next big Question--related thread
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Code_Red: *
**1. How much helpful your mother is, when you need counsel regarding family politics. Specially coping with inlaws. (if you are not married, then your views/predictions--How much you will rely on her.)
i don't like to discuss inlaws affairs with anybody ......
n its not that i can't rely on her etc.
oh , n i don't have any problems of that kind , to begin with
else than that .....i always seek advice from both mothers ....my biological mum n mum-in-law ....speciacially when its something about our children.....
n here , both of them r at 10 on scale
2..) i have 3 chachas ....n we have our homes adjacent to each other ....in 20+ years of my life i didn't witness a day ....with laRai jhagRay....alhamdulillah its lovely atmosphere there .....n our only phupho ....also lives in same city .....n she too is very nice
last year my mother completed her 'hifz-e-Quraan' mashaAllah ....
she started it with my elder chachi ...some 3 years ago .....but she passed away .....then it was my younger chachi who played the role of teacher then .....
need i say more ....????
decide the scale yourself!!!
That is simply great :k:
I hope more and more people have this much happy and peaceful life
Re: Re: The next big Question–related thread
hmm, guess what i dont believe you. 
these r terribly std steatements: mainay kabhi kisi kao oonchi awaz may baat kartay nahi suna, maynya kabhi kisi koa larai kartay nahi daikha, bla bla…
larai jab hoti ai sirf us wakt politics nahi oti. politics is an ongoing process, even the sweetest most obliging bahoo and saas involve themselves in it, cuz its not really politics simply having to deal with ppl who u have no blood relations to, involves “handling ppl” and absence of larai is what u call good politcs not an absence of it.
u r prob just parroting what certain elders have fed into u, or what u call subconcious blowing the ‘we=are-great-as-a-family’ waala trumpet.
ghulail tum kyun jal rai ho jal Kukri c&a mein meri thread mein ja k reply karo
Re: Re: Re: The next big Question–related thread
seriously you r a phaddaybaz kid:p
or is it ‘sour grapes scenario’
well seriously if you don’t believe …its ok …i’ll not force you to believe it …
waisay i’m old enough to differentiate between facts n ‘parrotting’
i’m quite used to responses like yours …coz alhamdulillah we HAVE an ideal family !!
Re: Re: Re: Re: The next big Question–related thread
uh oh. ^ tis kinda proves my point
besides, old enough to differentiate, old enough to manipulate.
i never even said family politics is bad, even then its difficult to not get defensive. sour grapes indeed. :flower:
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The next big Question–related thread
ya Allah kya fasadi cheez ho tum
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The next big Question–related thread
uff uff …u r rightly a ----->:devil: as u said urself
ermm…did i even mentioned ‘family politics’ …!!!
uffo…i’m sooo busy in kitchen …shami kababs need to be shaped …n spring rolls are waiting to be filled …n i’m trying to resist this urge to check your posts every now n then
waisay u r funny :k:
Re: The next big Question--related thread
I rely on her or my father each 95% in different issues (5% I leave for me to decide :D)
It was solely her patience that kept our family together or............. there was nothing left by the "inlaws" to break everything into pieces.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Code_Red: *
This is related to my thread regarding mothers...
As in subcontinent, family politcs is always present in our lives. So the following questions for you. :)
**1. How much helpful your mother is, when you need counsel regarding family politics. Specially coping with inlaws. (if you are not married, then your views/predictions--How much you will rely on her.)
You can answer using the scale from 1--10.
1 being poor , 10 being excellent.
[/QUOTE]
Re: Re: Re: The next big Question--related thread
May be Afia is among 5% most lucky people on earth who get all the nicest people as relatives. Sadly most of us are not that lucky :(. There are good people, very nice and caring.... but people with bad nature are also present everywhere...
As some of you took Family polics with negative connotations, it is not bad all the time, its just like politics you have to counter it with politics to control the after effects.
I partially agree with ghulail here...
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by ghuLail: *
**larai jab hoti ai sirf us wakt politics nahi oti. politics is an ongoing process, even the sweetest most obliging bahoo and saas involve themselves in it, cuz its not really politics simply having to deal with ppl who u have no blood relations to, involves "handling ppl" and absence of larai is what u call good politcs not an absence of it.
[/QUOTE]
It is very deep rooted, and not always evil. But you need to be good at it, to counter it.
Re: Re: Re: Re: The next big Question--related thread
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Code_Red: *
May be Afia is among 5% most lucky people on earth who get all the nicest people as relatives.
[/QUOTE]
well, i don't live among angels .....i do get my share but i just don't want a small number of ppl to be the headline of my life .......yes there r ppl who hurt us sometimes ....but don't we all do this sometimes ....
to err is human ....but the thing is how much forgiving you r for others knowing you urself r not perfect!
[QUOTE]
As some of you took Family polics with negative connotations, it is not bad all the time, its just like politics you have to counter it with politics to control the after effects.
[/QUOTE]
there you go....!!!!
in my view .....family politics will become as much complicated as you can make it ......
try to keep it simple ....
i know 'do good have good' doesn't really apply in many cases....but whats wrong in giving others some room to make mistakes ...n try to keep a check on urself too!
there is a hadith which means ....'a momin is like a mirror for other momin(muslim')'(yes i know its not religion forum)
i love it to bits
it means ....a muslim acts like a mirror for hios brother .....that means he tells his brother whatever is good and bad about him ....but tells it to just his brother n not the whole world except him....
AND
he tells it only when asked ....(your mirror doesn't start telling you about yourself when you r not standing in front of it)
we do it opposite .....
we don't tell the person making a mistake ....but start back biting about him ....n if we tell this person ...we don't check if he's willing to listen (standing in front of mirror??))
or we tell us in presence of the whole mohallah ....which never brings good results
dunno if i made any sense ...
sorry ....i just couldn't shut up !!!
We can only wish…
But, in reality this politics is anything but ‘simple’.
I am totally dumb when it comes to family politcs. But when i do analysis, I see many people pursuing their interests. Planning and implementing strategies. Not everyone is successful, but mostly many people are involved, some attacking others, while others defending themselves.
Its all mind game 
We hardly discuss family politics (read khandani). My mum is quite high strung and gets upset very easily over stupid stuff that doesn't concern her :D
She is actually quite respected w/in her in-laws alhamdulillah!