How much importance would you give to the mother tongue of a person while marrying him/her?Will you marry a person whose mother tongue is different than yours?I think among muslims,it shouldn’t at all matter what language that person speaks,but still I’m not sure whether or not do they consider it as an important factor before doing a rishta,etc.What do you people think?
How much importance would you give to the mother tongue of a person while marrying him/her?Will you marry a person whose mother tongue is different than yours?I think among muslims,it shouldn't at all matter what language that person speaks,but still I'm not sure whether or not do they consider it as an important factor before doing a rishta,etc.What do you people think?
Makes no difference but the person im going to marry should know atleast that one language which we
both will use to communicate with each other:D
Well , we are a punjabi family living abroad since ages ... my parents still converse with each other in Punjabi ... i can speak bit of it .. but my sisters cant ....
now the dialemma ... when it came to marriage .. my dad was making a conscious effort to find someone punjabi for me ! I speak english and urdu ... I could have easily gotten married in an urdu speaking family !
nevertheless , he did find a punjabi,urdu,english speaking guy for me ! and now my fiance and my dad like to chat in punjabi and ....... i just look at their faces!!:(
but i feel proud of my fiance coz at the end of the day , I will want my kids to learn punjabi and know more about our roots .. and if both me or my hubby do not know how to speak our mothertongue .... the kids will develop one of their own !!!
so moral of the story is , yes i guess its important that both are from the same culture .. although i do know several people who are successfully in a marriage despite the fact that they could only understand each other in sign language !!!
Re: The mother tongue!
No, it doesn't matter what your mother tongue is.
The thing that matters is compatibility. When two people share a mother tongue, they also share other things normally- what they eat, jokes, what they wear, etc. That is why you see people subconciously perfer people of their own kind. They are familiar with that culture, they share a similar upbringing, etc..
But you also may see more familiarty and compatibility with someone that doesn;t share you mother tongue, and that is fine too! It's really whatever floats your boat....
rozendeva ooo kurye tanu punjabi nai andi, manu v nai aandi ..waise punjabi nu master karna kayra vaaada kum haiga, punjabi filma shilma veekh, chori huale huale siikh jave gi.
WF
now this much better avatar, good job!!
ooojeee tussi tai kamaal ker ditti hai sameenji… 
assi holli holli likh leinday haa per bolni nahi aandi jee … filma deikhne di koshish kiti si … pehlay scene dai baad hi assi neend dai samander ich ghottay khaan lagday haa… hun ki kariye jeee … :hinna:
Re: The mother tongue!
My fiance doesn't speak my mother tongue at all but it doesn't bother me one bit.
Some people say 'what about the kids?' but from the many marriages I've seen where there are different mother tongues involved I've seen the kids do usually end up bilingual, they're like little sponges who find it easy to pick up languages :)
Re: The mother tongue!
My parents brought us up speaking English, Urdu and some Punjabi, and i taught myself French
My husband was brought up speaking French and English.
When we met, my husband started learning Urdu... he's pretty good now, correct pronounciation and everything :)
Kids are being brought up to know Urdu, English and French...
It's all about respect and willingness to learn... and i love the fact we can speak in different languages - so if we're at my parents house, we can have private conversations in French, and if we're at his parents house, we can speak Urdu !! :CareBear:
Re: The mother tongue!
I speak English and Urdu mostly. I know its important to pass on your language to your future generations...helps them develop a stronger sense of identity.
However, I have seen many many couples thrive without knowing any other language but English. Its a matter of how hard you want to work at the relationship, in my opinion. My fiance knows the hard Urdu...the kind that draws blank stares from me. But I think thats good because I want to pass it on to my children someday, Inshallah.
Re: The mother tongue!
It really depends on what your priorities are in terms of family life/relationship with spouse and the upbringing of your children. If culture is an important part of your life then of course marrying a man that has the same "mother tongue" as you would be of importance.
It really depends on what your priorities are in terms of family life/relationship with spouse and the upbringing of your children. If culture is an important part of your life then of course marrying a man that has the same "mother tongue" as you would be of importance.
I guess our priority should be religion and not culture
i think both culture and Religion, culture nahi saath mein apnaao ge to community religion bhi nahi practice karney de gi 
Culture culture culture ,whats this?
Culture culture culture ,whats this?
am not saying dunt give priority to religion, am saying you have to consider culture too, you cant totally ignore it ..
waisey your right.
waisey your right.
Say something i donot know!
I guess our priority should be religion and not culture
Agree 100%
Sometimes my relatives ask me if my other half is going to learn our mother tongue but as he converted to Islam a while ago (of his own free will and not purely for marriage before anyone jumps on my bk about that) I feel he has a lot on his plate already. Also can't expect him to learn a language I'm not totally fluent in myself either. My Mum always made a conscious effort to speak to us in our mother tongue (she even tried to teach us to read and write herself but we never made it past the alphabet lol) my Dad usually spoke English to us so I can understand 99.9999% of what people are saying but when I speak myself I don't feel that comfortable, I mean I have to actually think the words out in English first rather than the sentences just 'flowing' and everyone 'back home' thinks my accent is hilarious...
Good one. 
Mothertongue itself isn’t an issue–but rather how big of a priority it is in the individual’s life. Me, it was never an issue: the guy had to speak it better than me. And lucky me I married a poet. 