The Male Guide To Selecting An Outfit

Hangout Humor (Rated G)
1

| Are there| No | Are there | “What’s a | Are there clothes | No | Buy |
|clothes in|---->|clothes in | hamper?” | strewn in random |—>| more |
| dresser? | |the hamper?|----------->|piles on the floor?| |clothes|

------- > | Yes | Yes | Yes
±-----------------------------------------------------
|
V

| Take whatever |
| is on top |

 |                    |                        | 
 V                    V                        |

-------- No --------- -----------
| Is |---------->| Perform | “Ohmigosh” | Spray |
| it | Not sure | smell |------------>| with |
| clean? |---------->| test | | deodorant |

 | Yes                | "Not bad"
 +--------------------
 |
 V

|For underwear:| “Which ones are |Will they| “I may get |Place item on|
|Are there many| for my legs?” | be | arrested.” | dirty pile; |
| holes? |----------------->| visible?|------------->| start over |

 | No                              | No 
 +--------------------------------- 
 |
 V

| Is it | Yes | Do you | Yes |But would you rather have a tick on|
|wrinkled?|----->|really care?|----->| your eyeball than iron a shirt? |

 | No              | No                           | Yes 
 +----------- ------------------------------------ 
 |
 V

-------- Kinda ------- ---------
| Does |----------------->| Is it | No | Seek the|
| it | “Does it what?” | dark |---->|advice of|
| match? |----------------->| out? | | a female|

 | Yes                      | Yes
 +--------------------------
 |
 V

| Put on |

clothes!
2

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3 

          The Male Guide to Selecting an Outfit
            ---------------------------------------

 ----------       -----------              -------------------
| Are there| No  | Are there | "What's a  | Are there clothes |
|clothes in|---->|clothes in |  hamper?"  | strewn in random  |
| dresser? |     |the hamper?|----------->|piles on the floor?|
 ----------       -----------              -------------------
       | Yes           | Yes                | Yes       | No
       +------------------------------------            V
       |                                               -------
       V                                              |  Buy  |
   ---------------                                    |  more |
  | Take whatever |                                   |clothes|
  |   is on top   |                                    -------
   ---------------           -------------------------
       |                     |                       |
       V                     V                       |
   --------  No           ---------                -----------
  |   Is   |------------>| Perform | "Ohmigosh"   |  Spray    |
  |   it   | Not sure    |  smell  |------------->|   with    |
  | clean? |------------>|  test   |              | deodorant |
   --------               ---------                -----------
       | Yes                | "Not bad"
       +--------------------
       |
       V
   --------------                    ---------
  |For underwear:| "Which ones are  |Will they|   "I may get
  |Are there many|   for my legs?"  |   be    |    arrested."
  |    holes?    |----------------->| visible?|--------
   --------------                    ---------         |
       | No                           | No             V
       +------------------------------            -------------
       |                                         |Place item on|
       |                                         | dirty pile; |
       |                                         | start over  |
       |                                          -------------
       V
   ---------        ------------        ----------------------
  |  Is it  | Yes  |   Do you   | Yes  | But would you rather |
  |wrinkled?|----->|really care?|----->| have a tick on your  |
   ---------        ------------       | eyeball than iron a  |
       | No              | No          | shirt?               |
       |                 |              ----------------------
       |                 |                             | Yes
       +------------------------------------------------
       |
       V
   --------   Kinda             -------          -----------
  |  Does  |------------------>| Is it |  No    | Seek the  |
  |   it   |  "Does it what?"  |  dark |------->| advice of |
  | match? |------------------>|  out? |        | a female  |
   --------                     -------          -----------
       | Yes                      | Yes
       +--------------------------
       |
       V
   ----------
  |  Put on  |
  | clothes! |
   ----------
4

And I follow it to the letter !

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