Re: The effect of divorce in children
Bhai trust me I have been there. Not me personally but as I said I have been there. Just writing about this whole divorce issue is making me all shaky but I do know there is no turning back. It doesn’t always have to be lack of moral character or abuse. This relationship is the most strongest yet the most weakest relationship.
Why would you turn things around? For your kids? Its better to just do it as Aaliyah said than leave them hanging & dragging all the “larai jhagra” & making the home environment even worse.
When you have kids with someone you just don’t decide to separate all of a sudden or divorce each other. There has to be some some solid grounds for making you take this route. We are talking about divorce here not some petty little argument where you make up & forget about what happened.
When you come to a point where you want to divorce your spouse that means a lot of things have been spewing inside you. THAT hatred or resentment is worse & totally unhealthy for the whole family than just being separated.
As I said earlier there is a proper way of doing it.
Its easier for couples like us to talk because we are Alhumdulillah very very very happy in our marital relationship but talk to someone who is going through it.
That child will one day InshaAllah cope with it & learn from his parents mistake & hopefully provide a better life to his own children but the emotional scar it will leave on the parents is something they’ll always live with.
I know couple of different people where they stayed together for the 'sake" of their kids. Fighting & arguing everyday & then after many years decided to divorce each other. First you as a person are not happy, you obviously can’t handle things right because of that constant nagging going on for so many years & then you decide to divorce thinking oh kids are older now they’ll understand. I think that’s worse.
No one in their right mind wants to screw their own family (mind my language) & start his/her life all over again where they are not even certain whether this time things would turn out right or not.