are they over rated? does one really need to cry to prove their love?
i cry over retarded things.. like in full house when the sisters had fights, or like in home and away when someone dies… or when like my bro accuses me of insane things.. thats when I cry..
but, crying on a family members death, or when a family member is ill.. i dunno i just cant do it.. i go in this I-am-mature-and-need-to-be-composed mode.. but i get called heartless and unsentimental.. no love-bone person.. like honestly, why do I need to bawl my eyes out and pound my chest to prove how much I care..
i guess some people just don't have it in them to do that.
a close friend of mine hardly shows emotions and trust me it really ticks me off. but at times it does help if the other shows a response, i guess people don't want u to start veiling and crying like there's no tomorrow but obviously they cannot see thru you to know how you feel. therefore they are right on their part, showing some emotions or expressing yourself sometimes does the trick.
no that's just BS then...cuz i mean obviously you're expressing with actions instead of emotions.
hehe btw that reminded me of when my dada died couple years back, i was really young but i still remember it. my cousins were a lil older than me and they were crying so much but obviously i din't kno wut was going on. i just remember lookin at my dada with a white chaadar on him and ruiee in his nose and everyone weeping. and one of my cousin comes to me n says u are heartless, u can't even shed a tear when ur own grandpa dies. n i was like in total awe and embarassed.
but i guess at times people are just overwhelmed with emotion themselves that when the other doesn't cry they sort of take it offensively n think they don't care
yea but at times you just have to let them know clearly, because obviously they are humans too like i said they can't see thru u. cuz sometimes such situations create many misunderstandings too. trust me i've gone thru much of this
It's funny some people feel that outward shows of emotion are necessary. Just do what is natural to you and honest to your feelings. I come from a Pathan family. My dad was always very tough on the outside but you just know inside is a total softie. He is such an emotional and loving person but he's a rock. Now that he's older he says, "Ma tho both naram hogaya hoon."He tears up very easily now. I guess that's where I get it cause I cry at the drop of a hat. If I see anyone else cry without even knowing the reason i start crying.
But at a funeral for instance, sometimes there are so many emotions that are churning inside of a person that they may not be able to just grieve immediately. Just because you don't bawl your eyes out right away doesn't mean you're heartless. Everyone has their own way and their own pace. What you feel inside is something nobody can judge. So if you want to shed some tears you can slice an onion, if it makes others accept you more.
I am the same way, as everyone said people handle things differently. I recently attended my father’s funeral and through the service, the wake, the drive to the cemetary, I didn’t cry. Not until the 21 gun salute was over and I went to meditate over the coffin. All of a sudden I started leaking all over. My husband just stood there and held me. After that no more tears.
My sister said I was heartless.
Like Saimanyc said above - everyone has their own way and their own pace. Yours is fine for you.
