Tashreeh of some ashaar

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Itni takhreeb main tameer bana
Mujhe se kehta hai keh taqdeer bana,

Phir se kaha apne muqadar se faraib
Raakh se phir koi tasweer bana,

Aik dukh se main hua hun azaad
Phir koi halqa e zanjeer bana,

Zindagi ka to hua hun aadi
Is se hat kar koi tazeer bana,

Sach ki padaash me barbaad na kar
Shehr bhar me meri toqeer bana..

Koi tashreeh bta de iski plz :slight_smile:

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Re: Tashreeh of some ashaar

:confused: tashreya school mai kr laity hai wo kafi nae k
ab yaha b kryn

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Re: Tashreeh of some ashaar

seems like someone is really heartbroken when he wrote this lines. First line of every shair is a hope and then in second line he wishes for some bad thing again. Perhaps, he was just trying to be sad here ? I don't think you can do a tashreeh (like old days) of these shairs since they don't carry a story. That being said, I will try to put some words down for you.

In first shair - can't put in words.

In second one he is blaming on his destiny, that its always play jokes on him. While he says that, he created a portrait with ashes. So its actually his fault that he is doing mistakes but instead of accepting his mistakes he is putting blame on destiny.

Third shair, he is doing the same thing. He tells that he finally got rid of one of the problem of life and then he wishes that could you put another sorrow on me ?

4th shair, he said i am already used to of life, i need something new now.

5th shair, he is saying that don't punish me for being honest, praise me in the city (again, this doesn't make sense in the flow since the shair doesn't follow a story unlike)

I hope these are helpful. There might be someone better than me.

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Re: Tashreeh of some ashaar

Not tashreeh , but a markazi khyal :slight_smile:
Ik outline is enough to know the story …

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Re: Tashreeh of some ashaar

Thank you so very much ! :)
Its more than needed !