Re: Talking with a rishta- How do I move the conversation forward ??
Demesne, flawedsoul, NaMaan: Thank you for your suggestions, they are some really good ideas which i might try. I really like your idea flawedsoul of sharing memories and opinions. I especially like the idea of sharing childhood memories and proudest moments I think thats the kind of way I want this conversation to change, where we are more open with each other and are able to share things with each other without it being awkward. Obviously I know that inshaAllah it will come with time, but I appreciate your suggestions
Re: Talking with a rishta- How do I move the conversation forward ??
sequin, it might be easier if u stir the conversation that way by talking about the engagement. like perhaps your engagement's six month anniversary. use that as an icebreaker and be like "o i just realised today we have been engaged six months, isnt that crazy?"....and followed by ..."it got me thinking....."
bring up the topic at least!
Yeah I agree with demesne, I think bringing up your engagement by referring to your 'anniverary' or even your ring is a great idea :) Maybe you could say something like 'my friends were saying my ring is pretty today, its sooo weird to think of myself as engaged with my friends, how did you feel when you told your friends?' at least maybe then you could find out if he has told his friends about you and then continue from there
Re: Talking with a rishta- How do I move the conversation forward ??
Do you guys only converse over email? Not even text messages? Do you have his number at least? If you do, maybe you can start to open up the gates by moving the conversation over to the phone, or by sending him a text now and then to check in on his day and hopefully he'll start doing the same. I was always the shy one between my husband and I so I am glad he drove most of the conversations but I remember in the beginning I was still in school and he would always ask me about my assignments and exam details. Are you in school? Maybe you can begin to tell him how hard a certain class has been for you or how annoying one of your profs is... all in hopes to open up some flood gates, the only way to get personal is to start to get personal. If he emails you asking about your day... tell him things that happened as opposed to just "its going good" if you haven't done so already, ie: this is what happened today at work and school and so on and so forth, something that erked you, something that made you feel nice, someone complimented you. Its hard to get into deep personal conversations if you guys havnt even covered the basics. Send him a nice text message, like hope your day is going well, so and so happened it reminded me of this or that, thought I'd share it with because it really made me laugh etc..
One of you will need to break the ice. Do you live in the same city? Why not meet up for coffee or lunch one of these days? Its hard to drive conversation over email, it can come off as really random from what I remember but if there is an honest chemistry there, it shouldn't be that hard either you know. I think the more you start to talk, the more he'll have reason to ask you questions about whatever it is. :)
I think thats the kind of way I want this conversation to change, where we are more open with each other and are able to share things with each other without it being awkward. Obviously I know that inshaAllah it will come with time, but I appreciate your suggestions 