why do ppl alwayz just think about themselves and have no consideration for others?
my cousins hubby who’s a doc in the states, has been callin me up literally every other wknd with the SAME comp problem…ok fine, i’m in the IT field, i know a thing or 2 bout comps and can usually fix most problems myself…i don’t mind helping ppl out either, i do that all the time, real friends, online friends, family, practically i’ve never really refused to help anyone whenever they’ve needed it…so the first time around my cousins hubby calls, i diagnose the issue, help him fix it, and tell him that its only a temp fix, the issue will NOT be resolved till he gets a CD and does whatever i’ve told him…he assures me that he’ll get the CD the next day and will call me back so we can fix it once and for all…however, he doesn’t call the following day…days turn into a couple of weeks, and he calls again…same issue…i ask if he has the CD…he says no, but he’ll get it, and i should help him fix it again temporarily…so i do that…and i emphasize the point to him AGAIN that its only a temp fix, and he NEEDS the CD in order to get rid of this issue once and for all…i get the same reply, he’ll get it the next day…guess what happens…no call…this has been happening for the past few months now…everytime he calls, i help him fix the same problem, everytime he promises to get the CD and he doesn’t…i even had him write down the procedure somewhere in case the comp starts acting up again, so he doesn’t have to call me till he gets the CD, but of course he still has to call…
so he called again this past wknd, i kinda blew a fuse…refused to help him till he got the CD and told him to call back when he does…he said he’ll call the next day, with the CD this time…i told him i’ll wait for his call…next day, no call from him, but from my phuppo (cousin he’s married to is phuppos daughter) and she was pretty pissed off @ me for being “mean” to cousins hubby…said that he has some comp engineer friend of his who’ll be coming over to help him fix the problem, and i shouldn’t worry…i just said “ok” and that was it…so now i’m the bad guy for really just askin my cousins hubby to get a CD in order to fix the problem permanently instead of wasting both my time and his time on the fone every other wknd fixing the same damn issue! and it doesn’t really matter that i’ve helped him atleast 10 - 12 times before to “temporarily” fix the problem…
ok i’m done venting
any insight on this anyone? why do people behave like that? literally take advantage of others…and when u stop them from doing that, it creates misunderstandings between families…
Dm dont worry about it.It happens all the time. Something very similar happened to me. Since I am going for a degree in teaching - ofcourse I offer to help everybody with their school work.... if I can.Now this "aunty" asked me to help her two kids with their work.So almost everyday the kids would come to me with all their homework problems.
I didnt mind, until they started to flood my inbox with essays and constant phone calls.Still I tried being nice- and worked during the night to help them and do my own work.Well when exam time came I said enough was enough and called up the "aunty".Told her I was too busy and she better find somebody else.
Before you know it word spread all over about how 'snobby miss Sana is' ....'cant understand others majboorian' ....'wastes time that she could use to help others'....' and whats the point of her getting a degree if she cant help her aunty'.
Dont know why or how suddenly I was the person in the wrong.Believe me I was also angry.But I dont regret telling them off one bit. Dont feel bad.People need to learn that they cant always use others.
It’s very sad and a very common problem found among desis. I’ve never faces SUCH issue but my dad used to face these issues.
He knows how to fix cars, almost everything if he has the proper tools to fix them. His friends used to call him whenever they felt like, doesn’t matter whether it’s day or night, and he used to help them, just like in your case, temporarily but ofcourse they would need to go to the mechanic to get it fixed for good. Dad kept helping his friends for about 4-5 years and then he had enough but didn’t say anything to his friend but got his anger out on us :-s So we told him to stop helping them and if they are true friends, they wouldn’t mind because ofcourse you would think they’ll look at the positive side (how many times he helped them). So he did and told them he can’t do it, however, he can refer them to a mechanic that’s reliable. But then they got mad because my dad knew how to fix the problem but didn’t wanna fix it.
Damn right he didn’t want to fix it because if you’ll be a lazy and wouldn’t wanna spend your money on a a freaking mechanic, then he’s not your slave who can show up in any emergency no matter where you are. We are a lot better off now :rotato:
MQ: good thing u stood up for urself i just wish that u know, ppl would realize it for themselves b4 they start doin somethin like that…
shikrey: wow, its awesome that ur dad realized how he was being used and put an end to it :k:
fraudia: where’s maddie? as for callin him up with medical questions, i just can’t do the same to others u know…its just not me…
prax: thats what happens to me 2, and usually i don’t mind…as long as its a new problem etc, u know…but it just gets annoyin when its the same problem over and over again…and u’ve told 'em it can’t be fixed till they do somethin…
DM.. you are way too nice for your own good. Seriously. :)
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Muslim_Queen: *
I didnt mind, until they started to flood my inbox with essays and constant phone calls.Still I tried being nice- and worked during the night to help them and do my own work.Well when exam time came I said enough was enough and called up the "aunty".Told her I was too busy and she better find somebody else.
Before you know it word spread all over about how 'snobby miss Sana is' ....'cant understand others majboorian' ....'wastes time that she could use to help others'....' and whats the point of her getting a degree if she cant help her aunty'.
[/QUOTE]
Ok, so this is unfair. More important question is what did you learn from this experience and how will you do things differently if you are into the same situation again?
On a lighter note, you may consider spreading your word earlier yourself "how others keep taking advantage of me", and "they keep flooding my inbox with questions", and "I wish people are more considerate of others time". Its all a matter of PR, when it comes to family politics or community relations.
uff aik toh istraan k logon se muhjay itni chirh hoti hae na
boht acha kya DM aho :k:
what kinda kanjoos is he i thought docs were sposed to be rich cant he buy a freakin CD
oopar se phuppo ko shikayat sounds like a right immature character..boht acha hua us k saath that he is facing this prob…serves him right…u were too nice to him…mein hoti to do dafa se zada kabhee bhee help naheen karti
If u let other ppl create misunderstandingz in ur head and let them use u against the ppl u care for ... get a F**** brains transplant... or better shoot the ppl u are going to hurt with ur stupidity with ur own damn handz it will hurt them much less...
Desimunda you are so nice.
Please help me. Yaar merey computer per ek wibsite kholo tu do teen mazeed khul jati hain, phir wo paisay bhi mangtey hain. yeh kia problem hai.
mujhey konsi cd puchase karni parey gi ???
sadzzz i just think u know, if u help someone u r just doin somethin good, and no harm in doin that…i just hate it when ppl start takin advantage of that though…and i do stand up when i feel i’m just being used…
2G2BT thats funny, and i think ironically true as well
belle no hun, u can ask questions, like i said i don’t mind answerin them either…as long as its not a situation like the one i described above
KAB my man, heh, ppl will take advantage of u even if u r useless
i just wish that u know, ppl would realize it for themselves b4 they start doin somethin like that…
i thought docs were sposed to be rich 
cant he buy a freakin CD 
thats funny, and i think ironically true as well