Suhaag Raat

Ek_Larki · May 30, 2002, 6:38pm

Why do the guys make the relationship with their wives on the very first night of the wedding?I mean;the bride is shy at the moment.She should have some time for mentally preparation & this should be happen with both’s wish.Mutuall understanding is important.What do you say?

Umer · May 30, 2002, 6:43pm

Agreed!

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Umer, the Pakistani Brain of Austria

lost_soul · May 30, 2002, 6:51pm

I have this feeling that such questions have been asked and discussed in other threads. Anyways, I agree that the guy should be cognizant of the state of the poor girl.(geez,,,,obviously its a bit scarry thing)

Xara · May 30, 2002, 6:55pm

scary?? thats an understatement! more like petrifying
i asked one of my friends what shed do on the first night and she said first shed extend her hand for friendship then love
(no not the right hand then the left then..)
i meant literally i think thats better but how are you sposed to tell that to a guy?? would heget offended?

Sugar, spice 'n all things nice

Ek_Larki · May 30, 2002, 6:56pm

Well!It's my very first post on this site & I didn't go through any post.Sorry;I didn't know it has been discussed here earlier:-(

Ek_Larki · May 30, 2002, 7:05pm

Exactly;Xara!The guys don't get convinced.I don't know that why they become so conscious at that moment?The bride is nervous but I don't think that she is scarry.Yeah;but she might feel uncomfortablity when his life partner doesn't prefer to her will of getting some time in this regard.

system · May 30, 2002, 8:01pm

A relation of friendship brings two ppl close.and love makes their relationship deep and more setisfying psychologically and physically....
well dear ladies i do agree with you that a man MUST try to know and be known by his bride someone who will be with him for rest of his life....a gentlemans initiative..

Your Faith gives me strength
Your smiles wash away my sorrows
your touch heals my wounds
You are in my blood and my soul...
There is nothing more I want from this world but you my Messiah

CorruptAngel · May 30, 2002, 8:12pm

I guess you should read this massege…it was posted in another thread by Pristine…Very well and detailed!

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Originally posted by Pristine:
**Lest those of you who have limited knowledge, go away with the wrong impression, let me try to clarify something.

Marriage is usually a very special ocassion in the lives of both the bride and the groom. It is usually preceded by weeks of preparation and anticipation. In a typical wedding, the wedding day itself is full of activity and the night stretches to the wee hours by the time rukhsati takes place and the photographers take their leave. Its true that the bride wears heavy dresses and an heavier makeup.

But none of that compares to the magic of what follows. For those who care about these things (i.e. those who chose not to engage in pre-marital sexual liasons), the marriage contract (nikkah) is that something special which no other relationship provides to you. And for most brides and grooms, that simple piece of paper transforms a lot of things.

No one will say that it is mandatory to consummate the marriage on the first night, however, its probably not far from truth to say that most marriages do get consummated on the first night anyway. Its not out of some sort of social, religious or biological compulsion. Its simply because this is what both partners want.

To those who do not understand this thing at this point, you will, when you get to that point in your lives.

And if either of the partners do not wish to do so, there is no religious or moral code which dictates that you have to do it on the first night. If you hear anything to the contrary, its probably a twisted and frustrated male who came up with that bogus ruling.**

proudpakistani007 · May 30, 2002, 8:26pm

umm thanks corrupt angel…

I learned alot

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**Zindagi khail hia
Khail main agar choot lag jayee to roona kaisa,
Kuch na payee to schakayat kaisi,
Aur jo kuch paya hia ose khoona kaisa **

CorruptAngel · May 30, 2002, 8:42pm

You’re welcome PP Jee!

[am not gonna flood, sowwie!

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]

[This message has been edited by CurruptAngel (edited May 30, 2002).]

Xara · May 30, 2002, 8:56pm

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/ok.gif

Sugar, spice 'n all things nice

[This message has been edited by Xara (edited May 30, 2002).]

system · May 30, 2002, 9:24pm

whewww i am learning a lot from here..

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<::~Is thaT all You got? ::~I’ll Take youR best Shot~::>

google · May 30, 2002, 10:01pm

[quote]
Originally posted by Ek_Larki:
Why do the guys make the relationship with their wives on the very first night of the wedding?I mean;the bride is shy at the moment.She should have some time for mentally preparation & this should be happen with both's wish.Mutuall understanding is important.What do you say?
[/quote]

Ek_larki
Shyness has nothing to do with it. It is her false sense of feminine fear that prompts her to behave 'strangely'.

naik_shareef · May 31, 2002, 10:39am

but on the other hand, if a boy doesnt do on the first night, the girl might think that the boy is not interested in her..

to me its a very delicate matter..

Vaneeza · May 31, 2002, 5:03pm

Boys will be boys ..hastefull,impatient ,hyperactive ,manual,& tear open any package they get !

How many of you cant understand the curiosity,inquisitiveness of christian children on christmas eve or your birth day when you cant wait to open it before you can sleep

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/sleep.gif

Now if the girl is reluctant it is undrstandable & she should be able to ward off her husband …for the starter it wont be the first time she will need to do in there long & happy life

Its the boys right to be boy & its femenine skill, tact & magic to cast spell ,mesmerise charm & mould

You look Marvellous

[This message has been edited by Vaneeza (edited May 31, 2002).]

appkiamaanat · May 31, 2002, 5:52pm

This topic has been discussed many times before, and i agree with you that they shouldn't be in rush, but take it slowly.

hmmmm...but i was just thinking, what about the guy, he's probably just as nervous, why do we always just talk about the girl being shy??

X_1 · May 31, 2002, 6:26pm

Provide your comments on the earlier thread. Otherwise, both the arguments and the topic is getting very repetitive.
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/Forum46/HTML/000326.html