salam everyone
i need your suggestions regarding my friend.she got engaged to her cousin in 2010 but it didnt work and broken.
now her studies are completed and her mother is looking for good proposals for her.she needs suggestions if they should tell about her daughter’s engagement to the potential proposal? i have seen many girls who got married just after their engagement broke off.do their parents inform about their daughter’s engagement? guys suggestions needed.
Re: suggestions needed plz
W-salaam,
Technically Yes.
Re: suggestions needed plz
they shud tell just to be honest in a new relationship
Re: suggestions needed plz
thanks for replying.. :)
Re: suggestions needed plz
It may not be the first thing that she shares with the potential rishta but if she sees that things are moving in a positive direction and there might be the chance of something permanent then these sorts of things should be shared in a discreet manner.
Re: suggestions needed plz
I don't think it should really matter. Unless they ask, I don't see why it would be important to tell them anything about it.
Re: suggestions needed plz
I am really mixed about this...
An engagement is like a relationship...outside of marriage. There is no real legal value to a mangni or baat pakki so I don't see the need to tell.
If your friend was married then she'd absolutely be obligated to tell anyone interested in her about it. But she wasn't married, she was merely engaged and that to me is the same as being serious about someone but things just weren't meant to be so they didn't work out. Simple.
Re: suggestions needed plz
^That..
I don't think there's any need to mention it unless asked (assuming no nikah was done)..
Re: suggestions needed plz
thanks for replying..you guys r so sweettt
but actually there r many sick people who make big issues of such a small things..dats why i wanted to discuss with u
Re: suggestions needed plz
An engagement is a big deal because it is a serious commitment to be exclusive and plan a wedding/future together. So I think to be fair it should be brought up if things get serious. Basically at the point that people have the discussion about past relationships, that's where this becomes applicable. Your potential partner deserves to know who you were associated with in the past and to what extent, so there aren't any surprises later on.
I have spoken to guys in the past who had a broken engagement. It's not a big deal and most people don't hold it against you. But if someone lies about their past, that's a serious cause for not trusting them.
Re: suggestions needed plz
In my opinion, they should tell about the engagement first thing. Engagement is a big deal in our culture. It's better that the girl's family be open about it than the guy's family finding out from somewhere else. Why should you wait for things to get serious and then tell? There are many families or guys who might have an issue with it. So why would you want to waste your time and theirs and then tell.
Re: suggestions needed plz
:k: I agree.
Didn’t read your post before I submitted mine.
Re: suggestions needed plz
hmmm tricky tricky. i wonder what the rishta aunties will say. I think let them know upfront or like others are saying truoble can be created. These days boy's family so picky. Pata nahi kyun har choti cheez mein issue ya problem hai. Larki pehne pink shoes to problem. Larki pehne peela suit to problem. They will say that today is rainy mausam why not wear blue. Why are you so bright and happy? Look serious. You are getting married..going to husband home. Tell upfront so you avoid the intolerables (people you cannot tolerate) and you are left with a buffet of better choice to filter through. Because really do you want to marry into a household which wants you to dress according to the weather? No i didn't think so either.
Re: suggestions needed plz
agree!! thank u so much :)