successful marriage

LP · July 18, 2011, 12:58pm

your views on this article…

Scientists announced that for a successful marriage, a bride should be five years younger than her groom, should come from the same cultural background, and be the more intelligent of the pair if couples are to have a successful marriage.
**
The report published in The Telegraph talks about a team from the Geneva School of Business that found that this formula. The study shows that, if adhered to, the formula would increase a couple’s chances of a long and happy marriage by 20%.
The academic study, published in the European Journal of Operational Research looked at 1,074 couples aged between 19 and 75 years, to find which social factors were most important to a long and happy relationship.
Besides the man being five years older than his bride, and that his bride should share the same heritage, they concluded that a wife should be at least 27% more intelligent than her husband. She should also hold a degree, while he should not.**
The academics found that marrying a divorcee reduced the chance of wedded bliss.
Nguyen Vi Cao, who led the research, promised: “If people follow these guidelines in choosing their partners they can increase their chances of a happy, long marriage by up to 20 per cent.”
Kate Figes, who interviewed 120 people for her recent book on understanding relationship, Couples, said: “Aren’t most women the more intelligent in a relationship anyway? That’s my first reaction.
“It’s the only finding that rings true, from what I’ve found. Because it’s women who tend to determine the emotional landscape of a relationship,” she said.
“So I don’t find it surprising that women should be more intelligent.”
However, she warned that men should not stop making an effort.
“Intelligent men understand that for a relationship to be happy, their partner has to be happy,” she said.
Linda Blair, the clinical psychologist and author of Straight Talking, said: “Going back to prehistory, women have needed to invest more in relationships than men, because men are more biologically adapted to spread their seed around.”
They were therefore more likely to invest their intellectual abilities in maintaining that bond, she added.
“But you can convince yourself of anything,” she added.
However, Christine Northam, a marriage counsellor for Relate, said dismissively of the findings: “There are lies, lies and statistics.”
She could not agree that wives should be more intelligent than their husbands.
“Modern marriage is about both of you having an input in the relationship,” said Mrs Northam, who has been married for 41 years.
“It’s about teamwork. It’s not about one being dominant over the other.”

So Now can we have universitites for women only :@: men can sit bk and “NOT” have a degree …:hehe:

ZareenKhan · July 18, 2011, 1:49pm

Re: successful marriage

I def agree! All of it makes sense. I am not too sure of age difference but yes 5 years difference is fine.

PinkOrchids · July 18, 2011, 3:19pm

Re: successful marriage

Where the part where she should be 34, 26, 34 and know how to make every dish on his command, and generally be the perfect stepford.

How dare they miss this out.

PinkOrchids · July 18, 2011, 3:27pm

Re: successful marriage

^ in all seriousness, I really don't think the perfect marriage can be classified by results attained from a scientific study. Sometimes the strangest of matches seem to hit it off, its true when they say Joreehyaah Rub nei Bunayah.

Faris_Udeen · July 18, 2011, 3:37pm

Re: successful marriage

Yeah statistics are statistics... marraige and warfare like a lot of things are no matter how advanced your classification and measures are, theres no way you will know until you try it.

I find the suitable quote for Marraige summed up as... "If your going through Hell, Keep going!"

Captain_FT · July 18, 2011, 5:01pm

Re: successful marriage

and if that happened, then women will be going to work and men will sit back at home spending the money of his wife and would be unable to do something to spend a happy life. simple is that.

goddamniamsoawesome · July 18, 2011, 5:35pm

Re: successful marriage

I hope you're not trying to say statistics is fluff and not real science/mathematics?

Faris_Udeen · July 19, 2011, 8:10am

Re: successful marriage

"I hope you're not trying to say statistics is fluff and not real science/mathematics?"No brother what I meant is that statistics still cant decide your future, what you do is down to you. Statistics can help make your decisions but sometimes statistics and maths just get blown away by the human mind. Take sieges for example... mathematically speaking one can make a place virtually impregnable... but even the slightest security lapse or the latest innovation can still render it obsolete.

canadiandesigirl · July 19, 2011, 10:46pm

Re: successful marriage

Just because it says scientist doesn't mean it's a legitimate study.

pktun · July 22, 2011, 3:39am

Re: successful marriage

**i think every successful marriage has its own behind story
So from researches like these on 1000 or 2000 couples, u can only find out there successful lives…and nt everyones…bt may b u can say these researches can guide u 10-15%…

The main key to successful marriage life is what u give to ur partner
Taking care of ur partner more than urself sometimes…
and nw guys its nt being “Joru ka ghulam” **

Southie · July 22, 2011, 6:00am

Re: successful marriage

This study appears to have been done in Europe. Entirely possible, for Eurocentric culture, the results are valid. We dont know how results would change when applied to a different demographic.

sheyn · July 22, 2011, 6:08am

Re: successful marriage

**1074 couples decides what makes a successful marriage ............. Seriously ?????

I think the only bit of that article that I agree with is this :**

[QUOTE]
However, Christine Northam, a marriage counsellor for Relate, said dismissively of the findings: “There are lies, lies and statistics.”
She could not agree that wives should be more intelligent than their husbands.
“Modern marriage is about both of you having an input in the relationship,” said Mrs Northam, who has been married for 41 years.
“It’s about teamwork. It’s not about one being dominant over the other.”
[/QUOTE]

**
Marriage is a gamble , no matter how many issues you think you have covered there is always the one that evades you and then its all about how far and how long you can compromise or adjust .........

If there is any "successful formula" , I'd say its about going into it without "agendas" be them social , financial , status etc and just thinking this is it and we have to make it work as a team !!!**

aaliyahkhan1 · July 22, 2011, 6:28am

Re: successful marriage

Jeeeezzzz...I hate it how they try to make everything a "scientific" formula!!!!

TOTAL UTTER RUBBISH!

Southie · July 23, 2011, 2:23am

Re: successful marriage

^ You tell them, girl :)

KKF · July 23, 2011, 2:27am

Re: successful marriage

what are ur views, Missy? :)

Southie · July 23, 2011, 8:17am

Re: successful marriage

"1074 couples decides what makes a successful marriage ............. Seriously ????? "
Am not a statistics major - but I think 1074 data points for a particular region (say Northern Europe in this case) may be sufficient to draw conclusions for that region.

goddamniamsoawesome · July 23, 2011, 1:58pm

Re: successful marriage

Oh I'm not saying we don't see things that go against statistics around us but that's the whole point of this exercise; pointing out general trends.