Re: How may kids you want to have?
I have never really liked kids, or picked up or played with other people's children. I find them too demanding, too time-consuming, too ungrateful, too... stupid until they are at least 7. I don't like thinking that my identity will be transformed, that one child will make me into a mother first and an individual with my own needs second. I don't like the thought of sacrificing anything or making compromises. And there is always the loss of control. I was a horror as a child and gave my parents much grief. I like to control my life, I would not want someone else doing so. ** Please don't tell me I will change my mind and that "all women do". First of all, not all change their mind, second, it's insulting, as if one is insinuating that I cannot make a decision and stick to it**.
Well, wants and needs do change over time, and if someone decides they dont want kids now but do want htem later, that doesn't necessarily mean that person is flaky and unable to stick to a decision....
That being said, it's a decision that's between you and your husband. You know your situation, your abilities, and values the best, and will be able to handle all the criticism that comes your way.
Btw, do you get criticized a lot? What do you do when desi aunties (here n in pak) ask you abt kids (coz they always do!) Fortunately all the imp ppl are standing behind whatever decision i make but its still funny to hear desi aunties go "parhai choro, jaldi se BETA paida karo"...:p