One Singh was enjoying the sun at the beach in America. A lady came and asked him,
" Are you relaxing?" Singh answered, “No, I am Banta Singh.”
Another guy came and asked him the same question. Singh answered,
No No Me Banta Singh!"
Third one came and asked him the same question again. Singh was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place. While walking he saw another Singh soaking in the sun. He went up to him and asked,
“Are you Relaxing?”
The other Singh was a lot more educated and answered,
“Yes, I am relaxing.”
The Singh slapped him on his face and said,
“Stupid, idiot. Everyone is looking for you and your are sitting over here!”
Jasmeet Kaur caught her husband Santa Singh searching high and low all around his living room.
Jasmeet : “What are you searching for?”
Santa : “Hidden cameras!”
Jasmeet : “And what makes you think that there are hidden cameras here?”
Santa : “That guy on TV knows exactly what I am doing. Why every few minutes he keeps saying ‘You are watching the Star World Channel’. How does he know that?”
Having lost his donkey a Singh, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked,
“Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?”
The Singh replied
“I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn’t riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too.”
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination.
He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them out of the window. He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow suit. The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.
“Oye, I am only following the instructions here”! It says here “Answer the following questions in brief”.
Two Singhs were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like hell.
So the other asked, “Why are you crying?”
The first one said, “I came here for blood test”
Second one asked, “So? Are you afraid ? "
First one replied, " No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger”
Hearing this the second one started crying. The first one was astonished and asked the other,
“Why are you crying?”
The other replied, “I have come for my urine test.”
A Singh goes to a hotel and eats heartily. After eating he goes to wash hands but starts washing the basin instead. The manager comes running and asks him,
“Mr. Singh, what are you doing?”
To this the man replies," Oye, see the board here —“Wash Basin”.
In a party one of Santa Singh’s friends asked him how many chappathis he could eat in an empty stomach. Santa replied “Seven”. His friend asks him, “When you eat the first chappathi your stomach is no longer empty. Then how can you eat seven??”
Impressed by this tricky question, Santa as soon as he goes back home asks his wife, “How many chappathis can you eat in an empty stomach??” She says “Five”
Santa, “If only you had told seven I had a nice reply for it.”
Santa Singh and Banta Singh were sitting on a tree and Santa Singh was singing a song. After 4 songs Santa Singh hung himself upside down and started singing again.
Banta Singh : Santa Singh, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down?
Santa Singh : I am singing the B side.
sardarji#1 : went to kashmir officially and called to his house over phone.
sardarji#2 : had taken the receiver.
sardarji#1 : Who is speaking?
sardarji#2 : Servant Sir.
sardarji#1 : Where is the Madam?
sardarji#2 : She is sleeping with her husband in bedroom.
sardarji#1 : What? I am her husband came to kashmir today.
sardarji#2 : What can I do now sir?
sardarji#1 : Open the cub board, pick the Gun, shoot both of them, come back and tell me, Till then I am waiting in the line.
After some time … there comes 2 shooting sounds … after that …
sardarji#2 : Yes, I did Sir. But what can i do next Sir?
sardarji#1 : Open the back door, throw both of them into the well
sardarji#2 : I can open the back door, but how can i throw both of them from this third floor into the well in the ground floor Sir?
sardarji#1 : What…? Are you in the third floor?
sardarji#2 : Yes Sir
sardarji#1 : Sorry, wrong number !!!
The sardarni asks her lover, “santa dear, if we get engaged, will you give me a ring?”.
“Sure”, replies santa. “What’s your phone number.”
Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.
Surd #1: “Have you ever read Shakespeare?”
Surd #2: “No, who wrote it?”
