So today husband and mil have a hajj training session I told.husband that once.he’s back.we will.go out ( me and him kids ) but he messages.e.that his mum want to.visit an old relative.that lives next.to the hajj training.camp because she is going hajj next week..
He says we will.go after they come bacj.which I doubt as.it will.late.and shops shut.
This.makes.me.angry
why he couldn’t tell his.mother we had.plans
Am I.not important or.a priority at all.
My friend tells.me I’m.not.
Ita.not about today I need to go with him out and about here in pak and I feel throttled when.he can’t.
Khuda ke liye kam se kam Hajj par jaane se pahle ek dusre ko dar guzar karne kii koshish to kareN...Hajj par jaane se pahle log milte haiN aur apnii GhalatiyoN [agar koii huii ho to] kii mo'aafii maangte haiN...she is leaving next week. she doesn't have too much time.
why can't you and your hubby can go out tomorrow with kids?
your outing is for fun, hence not necessary/urgent while your MIL's visit is necessary. think about it.
How is it necessary? So she should meet every single.person she knows to ask.for this forgiveness??? Maybe she needs to look closer to.home and ask from.me???
Although I know he would never say oh wife and me.have pre- planned something. Would u ? As a husband ?
What.makes.anyone think if his mum.had said oh lets go shopping ( and.not.hajj related at all) that he would say sorry.mum I have plans with wife
why would he say that?
why cant his 'wife' enjoy an outing with the whole family?
i mean if you wanted quality time with the husband only, then I would understand you..but you want to go with the kids too so why not take your mother in law as well?
stop dividing your family.
alternatively, ask your husband for a seperate house. A one off fight will be much better than this daily torture. You might have a better relationship with your inlaws once you move out.
Dunno what's wrong with ne.maybe I have the wrong friends.giving.me.mad advice
Which is why I come.here.so bear.with.me.
So today husband and mil have a hajj training session I told.husband that once.he's back.we will.go out ( me and him kids ) but he messages.e.that his mum want to.visit an old relative.that lives next.to the hajj training.camp because she is going hajj next week..
He says we will.go after they come bacj.which I doubt as.it will.late.and shops shut.
This.makes.me.angry
why he couldn't tell his.mother we had.plans
Am I.not important or.a priority at all.
My friend tells.me I'm.not.
Ita.not about today I need to go with him out and about here in pak and I feel throttled when.he can't.
Does this sound worth it getting angry.
Because I.am
I thought I was changing
Every time I read a post like this, I love my wife a little more.
When you told your husband this, did he agree to go with you BEFORE telling you about his mother’s plans? Because based on what you wrote, it does not sound like there was a plan/agreement on his part for the outing YOU planned.
I have no idea why after being married for several year and being the mother of 2 children, you’re not able to deal with such a simple situation like an adult. I don’t care what your husband or MIL does…what’s YOUR excuse for being so inflexible? You want to go out shopping right? Hence the reference to the shops closing. Well, plans change. Your husband is already at a place where its more convenient for him to take his mother to visit the relative…both of them are already at the camp (relative lives next to the camp), and you/him/kids going shopping is not a big deal. Its not like you guys had dinner reservations where you spent an hour getting ready or tickets for a show/concert whatever. Its a frigging shopping trip! Unless the shops burn down, they will re-open tomorrow.
Besides, you already know how your MIL is. If your husband tell her that he can’t take her to visit a relative b/c he has to take you shopping, that would’ve led to her getting upset & start an argument with him…which would’ve put your husband in a bad mood. Why on earth would you choose to put your husband, a man you supposedly love, in a situation which would upset him in order to visit a shop?
Common people give her some break, there is nothing wrong if she wants some quality time with her husband and kids (without in-laws, friends, etc) before hubby leaves for hajj. If I was her, I would want it too. I would not fight or argu with husband if plans end up changing. I will stay quiet but it is natural to feel disappointed.
On a side note, in laws don't need to tag along every time they want to go out as a family or as a couple. This goes for both sides of in laws.
What.makes.anyone think if his mum.had said oh lets go shopping ( and.not.hajj related at all) that he would say sorry.mum I have plans with wife
His parents **raised **him. You will never be onthe same level as his parents, nor do you deserve to be. Granted, he should be considerate of your feelings but not at the cost of hurting his parents. If his parents ask him to take them out, then he should probably say something like: "I've made plans with nadzz and the kids but you're welcome to join us..."
As for the hajj thing, let it go. Your husband made the right call.
Nadz stop over reacting. Who cares if you had plans, once a while plans change and other things come up. It's life. In this case its your MIL all the time so I get your frustration but go out tomorrow night or once MiL leaves and there's no one to bother you. Why do you not feel like your not a priority? Why do you put your husband in a position to chose everytime? Just let things go, and relax and find some other activity. You wouldn't be acting like this had your husband had work that came up instead so just let it go and stop torturing yourself.
Unless the shops burn down, they will re-open tomorrow.
