Alvena,
A guy whom you hoped to marry SHOULD be making you feel beautiful and special.
But for a moment let's forget that you once wanted to marry him. Let's forget for a second that he was your boyfriend.
Instead let's examine him as a "FRIEND." Should a FRIEND be making you feel unattractive? Should a FRIEND be telling you that you're not pretty enough? Shouldn't a FRIEND show some consideration when you mention that you need help?
You said that he "tried hard" to be good to you. Alvena..........a FRIEND shouldn't have to "try hard" to be good to you. "Being good" to you and caring about you should come more naturally in a FRIEND. Even a female friend shouldn't act like this.
Alvena, as I mentioned several times in my previous posts.........this guy doesn't even know how to be a good FRIEND........let alone a boyfriend. And a FRIENDSHIP is the foundation of a marriage. How can you have a stable marriage with someone who can't even be a good friend.
And before you try to defend him by saying that "Oh he did act caring at times." Do you really want to be with a "friend" who is so moody and treats you rudely whenever he wants and in a caring manner whenever he wants. It's like he decides when he wants you and when he doesn't. And he should be trying to control you like because it shows no consideration for you.
And now he's starting to notice you, right? Do you know why? I'll tell you why. Because often times guys will want what they don't have. Now that you're not paying attention to him, he's more curious about you. But that doesn't mean that he's "in love" with you. Do you want a guy who only pays attention to you when you're away from him? Or do you want a guy who ALSO appreciates your worth when you're standing in front of him?
I think you're on the right track. Take this time to focus on yourself and your interests and in the process you'll hopefully figure out if you even think he's worth worrying about.