Solutions to all possible problems that would be wives could face ever
1.Dont have to live with in-laws
2.No dealing with MIL,FIL,BIL,SIL…no such issues
3.Don’t have to change last name
4.Don’t have to change your lifestyle
5.Can take care of your parents
6.Not dependent on anyone or fear of oppression from the husband
7.Nobody to stop you from having a career
8.Don’t have to prove yourself to anyone
9.If the husband is earning well and good, and if not he is totally financially dependent on you so you can have your say
Why not a ghar-damaad? all those who fear such problems after marriage, why not marry a man and bring him to your house?
It seems to me to be the perfect solution of all such problems..
also those living in West can find such guys very easily…
I don’t know how prevalent it is…but surely sound like something of a win win situation
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your spirit as you think in your mind that the counsel is wise .In short , Never tell yewr pr0blemx t0 any0ne .. 20% d0n't really care n the other 80% rr glad yew have them
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
How about we just look for men who dont have parents or siblings? Isnt that what men these days look for anyway? That way, they dont have to deal with a woman's family.
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
How about we just look for men who dont have parents or siblings? Isnt that what men these days look for anyway? That way, they dont have to deal with a woman's family.
I've never heard of this absurd generalization before.
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
Why not a ghar-damaad? all those who fear such problems after marriage, why not marry a man and bring him to your house?
Cos seeing as tho we're now adults a lot of us woud like to be independent and not leech off our parents under the excuse 'I'm looking after them' when really we're doing no housework, contributing little or nothing towards the bills and basically just staying at home cos it means we can now afford a BMW or latest laptop/phone/games console and don't have to lift a finger or clean up after ourselves cos we have the maid (ie mother/wife) doing everything for us.. basically living exactly the same as before marriage but with the bonus of (religiously allowed) sex on tap..
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
GS can't give the solution of such issues......... if u wana advice then search QURAN and Life of our PROPHET (PBUH) and his followers.........
Then whats the purpose of this forum? why people come here if they can find all solutions there?
How about we just look for men who dont have parents or siblings? Isnt that what men these days look for anyway? That way, they dont have to deal with a woman's family.
Thats another topic....i would like to have your views on current topic i.e Ghar Damaad.....is it ok, is it not ok, will work/not work? why?
Cos seeing as tho we're now adults a lot of us woud like to be independent and not leech off our parents under the excuse 'I'm looking after them' when really we're doing no housework, contributing little or nothing towards the bills and basically just staying at home cos it means we can now afford a BMW or latest laptop/phone/games console and don't have to lift a finger or clean up after ourselves cos we have the maid (ie mother/wife) doing everything for us.. basically living exactly the same as before marriage but with the bonus of (religiously allowed) sex on tap..
I said your house.....not your parents house..
and instead of answering my question all you guys are going here n there..
i asked a serious question.....
Do girls face the problems i mentioned ? yes or no
2.Does Ghar-damaad thing not solve it?
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
i asked a serious question.....
Do girls face the problems i mentioned ? yes or no
2.Does Ghar-damaad thing not solve it?
Perhaps it is due to me living in the West....but personally, I do not face any of the problems you listed. In addition, most of the girls in my family and immediate social circle do not face the problems you mentioned. Actually, I have a very large family living "back home" and even there women in my family do not have the problems you mentioned.
Unless I'm misunderstanding the term, "ghar damaad" is usually the groom moving in with the girl's family. I don't understand why anyone needs to move in with anyone else's parents immediately after marriage UNLESS the parents need them (ie. the parents are unable to live alone due to medical or mental conditions). Why can't the couple get their own house? And if down the road either set of parents need assistance in their day-to-day living, then the parents can move into the couple's home.
** for the sake of this post, I'm talking about the couple living in a house owned by parents. Not referring to house that was bought by either the husband or wife. I know couple where the husband moved in the wife's house (ie. not her parents, but her own house) or the wife moved into the husband's house (ie. not his parents, but his own house)....personally, I see nothing wrong with this scenario.
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
Alright, a serious answer is:
It will not solve anything.
Why does a man HAVE to be dependent on someone? Why can he not stand on his own two feet? If a woman can, what excuse does a man have to live with his mammi pappa or his inlaws? I do not understand this need to be a burden on someone so you will have to explain WHY it is that a man cannot just live on his own? None of the threads here have ever suggested a man moving in with his wife's parents. They stress independence.
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
I can't speak for anyone else, but i certainly am not dependant on anyone and have stood on my own from an earlier age of 10 onwards. i would add more, but its all a load of gobbluguke on here of late.
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
Alright, a serious answer is:
It will not solve anything.
Why does a man HAVE to be dependent on someone? Why can he not stand on his own two feet? If a woman can, what excuse does a man have to live with his mammi pappa or his inlaws? I do not understand this need to be a burden on someone so you will have to explain WHY it is that a man cannot just live on his own? None of the threads here have ever suggested a man moving in with his wife's parents. They stress independence.
Im wondering what men today are so afraid of?
none have suggested thats why i am suggesting..
i put the list of problems after seeing threads here...and responses on them....that why it has to be so n so......
just tell me why it will not solve those problems that i listed? you again went off topic......why he can't stand on his own feet or whatnot.......you are posing questions instead of answering..
question is......if that were to happen.....why it wouldn't solve 'those' problems........or do u deny that those problems even exist?
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
none have suggested thats why i am suggesting..
i put the list of problems after seeing threads here...and responses on them....that why it has to be so n so......
just tell me why it will not solve those problems that i listed? you again went off topic......why he can't stand on his own feet or whatnot.......you are posing questions instead of answering..
question is......if that were to happen.....why it wouldn't solve 'those' problems........or do u deny that those problems even exist?
The issue with living in a joint family situation is not always that the MIL is evil or FIL is insane. Its more to do with privacy, personalities involved and how they react when put together under the same roof. If you replaced the guy's parents with the girl's...how does that solve the problem? If the guy became a ghar damaad, eventually he would start making the SAME complaints that women do.
Tumhari ammi ne mujhe aaj tana diya...tumhare abbu ne mujhe ghar jamai bulaya...tumhara bhai mujhe acha nahin lagta...blah blah blah. Eventually, he would want to separate his family from inlaws...and you cannot blame him. Its his right to live in his own home with his family.
When a woman complains about moving out, Ive never heard her say...lets go live with my parents now and see how that goes.
Re: Solution to all the problems of 'would be' wives
The issue with living in a joint family situation is not always that the MIL is evil or FIL is insane. Its more to do with privacy, personalities involved and how they react when put together under the same roof. If you replaced the guy's parents with the girl's...how does that solve the problem? If the guy became a ghar damaad, eventually he would start making the SAME complaints that women do.
Tumhari ammi ne mujhe aaj tana diya...tumhare abbu ne mujhe ghar jamai bulaya...tumhara bhai mujhe acha nahin lagta...blah blah blah. Eventually, he would want to separate his family from inlaws...and you cannot blame him. Its his right to live in his own home with his family.
When a woman complains about moving out, Ive never heard her say...lets go live with my parents now and see how that goes.