Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
If one female in the family who is quiet ample woman, wants to "show" in extremely western style.
ample :O
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
Like the girl in afghan honor killing case.
Its easy to say "oh its bad , its this ,its that."
I just want to know have you ever spend some time thinking about it.
If one female in the family who is quiet ample woman, wants to "show" in extremely western style.
How could you still keep family like enviounmet intatct? How could your every other sentece would not be about inappropriate dress? How?
go on... Don't ask me any question please. I never thought about it my self.
Can u plz share he link of this afghan girl as I don't know this story :(
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
For under 18 there are non violent ways of dealing with their discipline issues because you cannot kick them out.
For example provide them minimum roti , kapra nd makan , deprive them of all the privileges and life of luxury .
This guy was a wealthy man , he did not want to sacrifice his lifestyle and still wanted to be in charge and in control of these girls and her wife that is why he resorted to violence to deal with this disciplining problem.
For 18 or older all you can do is let them go their own way if they do not want to mend their ways.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
Can u plz share he link of this afghan girl as I don't know this story :(
Google 'shafia family' :(
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
Oh I would slaughter her 
!
So OK a kid in the family goes astray. What happened to my sensibilities? My maturity? Could I not sit with her and explain why what she is doing is not appropriate?
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
^Ditto. Going to extremes is plain jaahil and basically a sure-shot way of saying you lost the battle of being a good parent because reacting in anger or losing your temper to the point where you cause harm is not only a huge fail as a parent but a huge fail in general. You basically lost as a parent.
And obviously this Afghan family was BEYOND out of control and barbaric but cases like this are common in Pakistan/India as well. And there are ways to discipline every single child out there. Reacting out for essentially something you CAN control is beyond stupid. The best way to get to that kind of a child is to talk with them alone about boundaries, limits and of course to treat them like you respect them. Children who feel scared of their parents and don't respect them are the one who end up rebelling most of the time. Instead of making your child afraid of you, teach them to respect you so they don't break rules but also aren't afraid to come to you when there are problems.
Every single out-of-control child I know either has clueless parents or overtly-strict/OTT parents. The end result of such parenting is the child unleashing like crazy and of course not having any respect of boundaries.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
what would be your 'sakhti' ??
Like taking her privileges away. I.e, Cell phone, car, grounded, no internet. Things like that!.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
chelkaow kiya hota hai?
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
^^I was wondering the same thing 
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
^I was too. I thought it was a typo for “Chalako”, y’know like chalako maasi? 
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
we all go through rough stage in our life in which we are worst than animals...in other words we all have been through "Zamana-e-Jahalia". these awkward phases i believe almost every girl go through.
its good to be patient and listen to their tantrums cuz it will save everyone from a bigger disaster.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
so, it is chalako massi. 
if we particularly take the example of afghan-canadain family incident. Zainb and Sahar were crazy in love. they crossed all the limits in gf-bf relationship. I am surprised by their courage to pose in bikini and sharing pics with bfs. 
However, It was really sad to see that their father is also a crazy man, who took the life of 4 people.
Geeti and Rona were never been in any affair, but they were also the victim.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
I would actually question my own parenting and perhaps where I fell short in becoming my daughter's friend. I am not a parent yet but I have a HUGE feeling that most girls fall into this stuff when they don't have a strong enough bond with their parents. Would probably try and love her more and possibly win her over to my side.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
Children should not be raised like animals where a roof and a plateful of food is enough and the parent feels that their job is done. Raising children is tough, you have to parent them physically and emotionally. I was really sad about the the family who killed three of their daughters and none of them seem like they regret killing them. AB jail main maro because obviously izzat wale log to sare jail main hote hain. I HAD TO GET THAT OUT OF MY SYSTEM! I wouldn't disown my daughter, I would stop her but I would also try to figure out the cause of her need to flaunt. At a time like that, pushing her away will only make her try to test her own limits. KILLING any human is not the answer and because a girl doesn't want to marry a boy you like shouldn't want to make a parent kill her, instead they should consider not forcing the man of their choice on her.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
Raising children is tough, you have to parent them physically and emotionally. I was really sad about the the family who killed three of their daughters and none of them seem like they regret killing them. AB jail main maro because obviously izzat wale log to sare jail main hote hain. I HAD TO GET THAT OUT OF MY SYSTEM! I wouldn't disown my daughter, I would stop her but I would also try to figure out the cause of her need to flaunt. At a time like that, pushing her away will only make her try to test her own limits. KILLING any human is not the answer and because a girl doesn't want to marry a boy you like shouldn't want to make a parent kill her, instead they should consider not forcing the man of their choice on her.
Exactly eh!. i personally heard when parents say, "i will dis-own you if you do this or that". Like it is not big deal to break off ties. This is not how our society has to be. I would do the same as a father..Insha'allah hopefully!.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
That story is so disgusting and sad...:(
Bottom line. You brougth the kids into this world, they didn't walk out of your womb against your will. So its YOUR responsibility to guide them onto the right path. Parenting is difficult and hard work, but you gotta keep talking to your kids, let them understand and try different communication skills. Because you owe them that just like kids owe their parents respect. But parents have to remember that it is the 21st century and times are changing, and NO ONE can be perfect, its a child for gods sake! Not a robot! He/she has desires, wants, a will of their own. Both parents and kids need to find a middle ground. << Words of my mother.
Re: So you have a chelkaow daughter/female in the family.
Both parents and kids need to find a middle ground. << Words of my mother.
Exactly yo!. This is number one issue between parents and kids. Parents aren't flexible enough to come to middle ground eh. But some parents can come to middle ground for solutions.