Why is it so unfair that we girls have to leaveeverythingof our s for our husbands and inlaws while the husbands will always thnk of it as something that ur supposed to do anyway.. why are we expected to follow evrythng that our inlaws expect from us while our hubbys think they dont need to do anything for our family except for maybe a phone call on eids and other occasions. . This is just so so unfair. Hate it 
Re: so unfair :(
Stand up to it if you don't think it's fair.. at least try...
Re: so unfair :(
Iv tried but it always ends up in a fight where im already being a bad person for not living with my inlaws so as hubby says the least u can do is skype wid them daily .. but then it has to b fr both sides dont u think :( hubby nt calling my fmly makes me wanna do the same to his :/ also cuz everytime I talk to them they have something to complain abt
Re: so unfair :(
I don't get this need to daily communicate with your in-laws. Most stupid thing ever.
Re: so unfair :(
Here's what you do. Talk to them on the phone when your hubby is around. Then hand him the phone after some brief hi hello's. Then if later, your husband says why aren't you talking to them much, you turn it on him, and say hai Allah, jee, aap ko apni family se baath nahi karni hai? Mein tho kam baath karti hoon, so that you can talk to your family more. Gunnah hai, I will need to tell your mom you're trying to avoid her.
That should take care of it.
Re: so unfair :(
Omg thats a great idea why din I think of this bfr.. u cannot imagine how bad it is everyday I hav to talk to them even if I hav nthng to say its just so annoying ! Thank u for the advice
Re: so unfair :(
This is a cultural thing rather than a religious one. In-laws are also like parents in the religion however that does not mean that they are higher than our own parents. You are not allowed to disobey our parents unless they tell you something against Islam however you can disobey your in-laws even if it not against the religion. They are many ways we can increase our liberty and make regulation ineffective and inefficient. You can say that your are going to the store and visit your family (depending how far they are from you). You do not even have to lie. Step a foot in the the door of a store and get back out and go to your family. You can call more like this too. You can ask to spend more time with your parents. Maybe one of your parents are not feeling good. You can say they are not feeling good and I need to see them and spend some time with them.
Re: so unfair :(
You shouldn't need to ask to spend time with your parents. If you are, something wrong with the relationship to begin with.
Re: so unfair
serious dilemma 
Re: so unfair :(
It is hard but if the husband and in laws are caring it shouldnt be like that. I am sure they too have daughters at home. It is reasonable what he is expecting. Talk to him about it or mention it to someone who he trusts maybe that can convince him? explain to him nicely that he should reciprocate as it will make u happy. PCG's words are good. I'd take that advice and trial it.
Re: so unfair 
The best way to stop this pattern of daily calling is to convince your mother in law that talking to you less is better in a way that does not offend her. In other words, control her mind or maybe bore her with all the humtv serials that you have seen. Tell her about what happens in each one of them (even if you have to google the synopsis and fill in the details). Every single detail. I am sure your mother in law watches them as well so it can also be something that bonds you..
There are lot of tips online on how to figure your mother in law out and to control her. Let me send you some interesting links. Experiment with these techniques, fine tune them till you find what works for you. Good luck.
Lot of good tips on here and it helps divide down the types of mother in law.
Taming The Monster-In-Law | ANOKHI Magazine | Fashion, Lifestyle & Entertainment – North America’s Longest Running Quarterly Magazine About South Asian Pop Culture
mother-in-law | A Desi Girl’s Guide to Relationship Survival
How to Deal With a Domineering Mother-in-law | eHow
try to get her to convert those phone sessions into text messages. Convince her on how cool she is if she does that and how modern it is. Tell her all the mod-mother in laws are doing it this way and since she is way cooler she should be ahead of the trend. Make it a competition you two against the other daughter/mother-in laws. Tell her you will increase her knowledge of technology so she is ahead of the mother in laws.
Re: so unfair :(
Why is it so unfair that we girls have to leave*everything*of our s for our husbands and inlaws while the husbands will always thnk of it as something that ur supposed to do anyway.. why are we expected to follow evrythng that our inlaws expect from us while our hubbys think they dont need to do anything for our family except for maybe a phone call on eids and other occasions. . This is just so so unfair. Hate it :(
i really don't think so that girls need to give up everything once they are married. every stage in life demands few adjustments and changes and so does marriage. and it is not only for the girls that they have to change few ways. it is same for the guys as well. for example i have seen many men who has limited their friends gatherings to once or twice a month from the weekly gatherings once they are married. another example could be less late night TV watching if the wife is an early to bed type and giving up few other activities etc, like playing some kind of sport that requires more time, giving up smoking on wife's demand etc. so saying or believing that its only girls who need to change and give up everything is an overstatement.
now on your scenario of your husband not calling your parents just occasionally might be an upsetting factor for you but men function differently than women. they are not really bothered about calling or talking to their in-laws regularly. also in our culture in-laws of the guy also dont expect him to call or touch base with them directly other than on the occasions or family gatherings. indeed some parents are relaxed with these kinds of Damaads saying that" shukar hamara damaad apney kaam se kaam rakhne wala hai".
on your another issue that your husband wants you to talk to his parents/family daily then i would suggest that if you just don't want to do it because your husband doesn't talk to your family daily then i think its kind of childish.
if his family likes talking to you and if you also feel comfortable talking to them then i think there is no harm in this. after all its about maintaining good ties with the in-laws and would harbour good feelings among you all. secondly i think if you talk to anyone daily then the duration of your conversation automatically becomes less per day as neither party can go on for hours and hours if they are talking everyday, so this can be a manageable thing for you too.
Re: so unfair :(
I couldn't imagine what I would talk about with the in laws if I had to do so everyday and that too on Skype, I hate doing video calls anyway but everyday would seriously do my head in. I would have to just tell dh i am not doing it!!!
Re: so unfair :(
I couldn't imagine what I would talk about with the in laws if I had to do so everyday and that too on Skype, I hate doing video calls anyway but everyday would seriously do my head in. I would have to just tell dh i am not doing it!!!
humtv serials. I am sure they watch them. describe what happens in every single scene. tell them everything you did today and what your plans are tomorrow.tell your mother in law how wonderful her cooking is and you hope one day to reach those same standards. Maska lagao. Phir woh bore ho jayenge aur sirf once monthly chahenge.
so unfair :(
Woah Skype with in-laws everyday??? That is a bit much, no? I mean what can you possibly talk about everyday?
The last time I talked to my own parents was last Thursday :/
With all due respect, what is wrong with talking to your in-laws everyday? My wife talks to my mother everyday, two times a day. Today because of that, not only they have built a great friendship, amongst two real daughters and two bahus, my wife is my mom's favorite daughter.
I know it requires patience on your part, but please don't think that it does not require patience on their part to be talking to you every day. Woh bhi koi maray nahi jaa rahay aap se baat kerne ke liye. If your in-laws and hubby are trying to put effort to have you two parties build a great relationship, don't lose the opportunity by trying to behave like a typical desi girl who want authority in husband's house, without any responsibility.
No wonder the life of our newly married girls seems so challenging, cause they make everything an ego issue.
Re: so unfair
I don’t know you at all nor your husband/inlaws but I think you’re making gross generalizations here. What do you mean “leave everything behind for your husband and inlaws”? Has your brain been reprogrammed? Have been made to change your personality? Are you shackled to a wall and cut off from the rest of the world?
Assimilating into a new life, new family, and new norms is tough in the beginning, yes, but it’s nowhere near the death sentence you’re making it out to be.
If you think logically, not emotionally, I’m sure you can find some happy medium that will not only keep you in your comfort zone, but will not alleniate you from your husband’s wishes either.
There are plenty of men/husbands out there who are equally attentive/close/friendly with their wife’s parents as they would like their wife to be with theirs. But those relationships don’t form overnight either. They need to be nurtured and formed, just like your relationship with his family. Like TLK Bhaiya said, don’t make this into an ego issue. Communicate with your husband isntead of whining about it. You catch more flies with honey.
And the fact that you’re having to Skype with them means that you don’t live with them in a joint family system, right? 
Re: so unfair :(
Not promoting the concept of tit for that or anything bu I don't quite get why this is an ego issue, if my husband expects me to speak to his mum on a daily basis assuming he thinks that shows her respect or consideration why shouldn't I expect the same respect and consideration for my mum?
Re: so unfair :(
he still can be very respectful to your mum even if he is not calling her everyday.
i think a difference in gender comes into play here. women are always easy to talk to each other and are generally chatty amongst themselves. interactions/conversations between DIL and MIL are usually more as compared to between DIL and FIL or DIL and BIL.
so may be guys cant carry out a long or daily conversations with their mom in laws. may be a guys mom in law too feel the same way and wonders what subjects to talk about with a son in law if he calls everyday and hence this thing hasn't become a general practice yet.
and btw on the funny side,if its all about same expectations, same standards then why i see no bahu complaining when husband's family pass on the family traditional piece of jewelry or any other family valuable to the bahu saying she is the new "Haqdar" to it, then why the bahu doesn't ask her own parents to treat the husband the same way and pass on some family valuable to him. lols.