So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

[hayatkhans]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

wana be a mum:
Read YA-KHALIQOO (Allah's Name) (The Creator) 313 times after every prayer.

[Spanishgirl]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

Wannabe_a_mum, Relax a bit, maybe it will help, and dont put all the "goras" in the same bag... Good Luck! :)

[nia_khan]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

I will mention one thing only.

Log nazar laga dete hain... stop telling people you are trying to get pregnant so they can feel sorry for you. I mean please dont get me wrong only trying to help -not reffering to you posting on gupshup. But people around you dont tell them anything...

sometimes kahi hoi bat ap ke against ho jati hai... jsut keep things between you and your husband.

My cousin had few miscarriages as well i believe 3 or 4. but Mashallah today after 8 years of shadi she has the most adorable baby boy. I know another woman who had a baby after 10 years of shadi. Duaein kaam ati hain..

hang in there :~)

Talk to someone, molvi sahib or mufti sahib... :~)

always help..

[wannabe_a_mum]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

Thanks everyone for all your words, thoughts and (Insha Allah) duas for me.......

I have been told by my auntie that she strongly feels that someone has put nazar on me, as when I married and fell pregnant I had everything, great career, home, husband and child to come........
We are thinking of going to see a molvi sahab in Leicester who we have heard is very good in lifting the nazar etc.......making dua that helps me........
In the meantime, I am still praying that I may still get me +ve pregnancy test this month as my symptoms are still here.........

nia_khan - I understand what you are saying, I know for sure that some people revel in that fact that I am having dicfficulty - some of those people are relatives who I look up to................now we don't show our grief outwardly to everyone.....we have more faith in Allah SWT and his power..........

Thanks again guys for all the words in this thread.................I will try to put the depressive mood behind me and think positive!

hayatkhans - thanks for the suggestion of what to pray. I will Insha Allah start praying this as soon as possible.

[Tashiqa]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

@wannabe_a_mum

What I mean is that there are people who abuse their bodies, intentionally commit sin, hurt others feelins, go against the teachings of our religion..........then there are the mainly gora people who are into drug and alcohol abuse, yet all these people seem to have healthy babies, whether they are wanted or accidents.................

I assure you that I know that we commit sin with each step we take, each breath we take....................... [QUOTE] but until you are in my situation you can never understand how I feel.

I am not arguing against what you said.........I am just saying that it's hard to see a drug addict fall pregnant accidently, hard to see 13 year old girls falling pregnant accidentally................

I did not have a problem conceiving before, which is why it is harder for me...knowing that I have been pregnant many times yet have no child (here) to show for it............in my heart there is also the consolation that Insha Allah my children are waiting for me after death.........this is something that many many people have consoled me with................when I think of that, I have peace in my heart and count myself very lucky as those children will be there waiting for their mother.........................

That thought keeps me going each day............
[/quote]

As a matter of fact I have been in your situation and do know how it feels. I lost my beautiful 11 year old daughter 8 months ago. she was my only daughter and she died in my arms in a matter of seconds from status asthmaticus. I know exactly what you mean when you say that the only thought that keeps you going is that one day you will meet the ones you lost.
you are in my prayers and i hope Allah gives you what you long for. however while you pray and hope and wait keep one thing in mind always. Be grateful for whatever happens. there is a grand purpose behind all that happens. Life and death is pre-ordained and we cannot question, only accept and comply.thats Islam(surrendering to Allah's will) .important thing is not to feel sorry for yourself. God tests the ones he loves to see how patient you are and to be patient means to wait with a good attitude. To compare yourself to others and feel bitter will not help you or anyone around you. Keep the faith. Trust Allah hears you and sees you and knows how badly you want this. In his wisdom whatever He decides is for your good. Its hard to see all this when one is going through what you are. Try to see beyond your pain and know that God will give you what you want and if not you will be compensated for it.
I will say a special prayer for you. May you find peace no matter what.

[UZ]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

@Fraudz

we went thru similar stuff, ectopics, premature birth due to PROM and loss of twins, after that further complications and ectopics. My wife actually felt the exact same way you are feeling. At times she was more concerned for my happiness than her own.

We decided to adopt and are very happy and fulfilled. If at some point in time we are blessed with biological kids again, great.. if not, we alredy had two, even if it as for such a short time, and now we have two adopted babies who have become the center of our universe.

MASALLAH great job mr.fraudia

[UZ]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

@Tashiqa

As a matter of fact I have been in your situation and do know how it feels. I lost my beautiful 11 year old daughter 8 months ago. she was my only daughter and she died in my arms in a matter of seconds from status asthmaticus. I know exactly what you mean when you say that the only thought that keeps you going is that one day you will meet the ones you lost. you are in my prayers and i hope Allah gives you what you long for. however while you pray and hope and wait keep one thing in mind always. Be grateful for whatever happens. there is a grand purpose behind all that happens. Life and death is pre-ordained and we cannot question, only accept and comply.thats Islam(surrendering to Allah's will) .important thing is not to feel sorry for yourself. God tests the ones he loves to see how patient you are and to be patient means to wait with a good attitude. To compare yourself to others and feel bitter will not help you or anyone around you. Keep the faith. Trust Allah hears you and sees you and knows how badly you want this. In his wisdom whatever He decides is for your good. Its hard to see all this when one is going through what you are. Try to see beyond your pain and know that God will give you what you want and if not you will be compensated for it. I will say a special prayer for you. May you find peace no matter what.

ALLAH aap ko bohat sabr aur hosla dey tashiqa.ameen ur faith is very good MASHALLAH

[Tashiqa]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

@ume-zafeerah

ALLAH aap ko bohat sabr aur hosla dey tashiqa.ameen ur faith is very good MASHALLAH

Thank you Ume-zafeerah . Sabr aur honsla bhi sirf Allah hee day sakte hain. I simply asked for patience and faith and He granted it. Alhamdulillah.

[system]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

You can be happy and fulfilled without children and many people are and in fact prefer it that way. It is not necessary to have them. Find pleasure in other things not as a way to fill some "void" but to enjoy life. Travel, go back to school, do things you will not have time for with children. Live it up.

[Mr_Fraudia]

Re: So depressed…when will it be my turn??

@Kodiak

You can be happy and fulfilled without children and many people are and in fact prefer it that way. It is not necessary to have them. Find pleasure in other things not as a way to fill some “void” but to enjoy life. Travel, go back to school, do things you will not have time for with children. Live it up.

yeah but those are ppl who dont feel that they need children in their life. It is not necessary to have them for those kind of people. Obviously the person in question here wants kids in her life, so a ski trip or underwater basket weaving is not going to compensate for that

[wannabe_a_mum]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

@Fraudz

yeah but those are ppl who dont feel that they need children in their life. It is not necessary to have them for those kind of people. Obviously the person in question here wants kids in her life, so a ski trip or underwater basket weaving is not going to compensate for that :)

Yes, well said Fraudz.....................
And anyway, I can do these things even WITH children in my life. I have done it now (done a Uni course etc etc) and I am sure that I will do it when Allah SWT grants me children......Children are not a hinderence they are a gift and I hate it when people say that they can't do this that and the other cos they have kids...all it takes is planning....and even involving the kids....

[mahanoor]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

tht is very sad to hear
but dont worry inshallah u will become a mum some day by Allah will
just keep prayng and asking Allah
my parent are going hajj this dec inshallah i will tell them to pray for u and
for woman who have no kids.

[wannabe_a_mum]

Re: So depressed…when will it be my turn??

@mahanoor

tht is very sad to hear
but dont worry inshallah u will become a mum some day by Allah will
just keep prayng and asking Allah
my parent are going hajj this dec inshallah i will tell them to pray for u and
for woman who have no kids.

I would like to ask all those who are going for Hajj/who know of anyone going for Hajj, to make duas for all those who are childless…please make dua that we are all granted healthy children who have a long anf fulfilled life and grow up to be wealthy in imaan. (Ameen) And may Allah SWT give us the strength to raise those children he grants us in His way.:insha:
Jazak Allah

[system]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

Good luck.

[Zgard]

Re: So depressed…when will it be my turn??

i think may be in vitro fertilization is an option for u ,u can either wait for it to happen or to make it happen choice is u,rz…
](http://biblia.com/sex/fertilization.htm)

[Mr_Fraudia]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

IVF is not all what it is cracked up to be and does not guarantee results, this is evident in success rates, and depends highly on type of infertility.

[Zgard]

Re: So depressed.......when will it be my turn??

well it has work for others n if that can solve her problems then why not n once it works then who cares about the statistics .Statistic also shows that there r woman who face problems like her r very rare but thos statistics doesn,t really solve her problems