Skin tone and marriage

[Reha]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I think this preference is because people want their kids to be fair so they choose a gora partner.

Khud bhi kalay, bivi bhi kali to bachon ko andheray mein kaise dhondengay? :(

[Deeba1234]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

^In my extended family I noticed amongst the elders if one person was very very pale they often married someone darker so the kids ended up 'in the middle'..

I don't think it's necessarily 'shallow' to have a preference for lighter skin because I don't think it's that different to wanting someone tall or slim or whatever else.. to me it's about personal preference..

What I do have a problem with is only fair skin being considered beautiful..

[SaeedinPakistan]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

@madz124

You can. So let me ask you this, if you have kids from both. You have one set of brown kids and one set of gora kids. Which kid would you love more?

I’d love em all the same ;).

[Pinkcess]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I think more than wanting a fair wife the guy and/or his family want fair kids.

[SaeedinPakistan]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

^
Fair skinned baby girls more so. I don't think people have a problem with their boys being a bit on the dark side. However girls being dark means rishta trouble down the road. It's a never ending cycle I guess.

[pwner]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

@SaeedinPakistan

^
Fair skinned baby girls more so. I don’t think people have a problem with their boys being a bit on the dark side. However girls being dark means rishta trouble down the road. It’s a never ending cycle I guess.

naa…its not never ending. Untill the darkones get eliminated with this un-natural selection

The average NC number of the population would improve down the line.

[MrRight]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

Its a preference of some men.
Just like most women want tall men even if they are short as midgets themselves.

[SaeedinPakistan]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

@pwner

naa…its not never ending. Untill the darkones get eliminated with this un-natural selection

The average NC number of the population would improve down the line.

If that’s the case the average would stay the same, the standard deviation would get lower though.

[candy_apple]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

To be honest, I don't see this preference for fair skin anymore (thank god)!

It was prevalent in my husband's grandmother's generation (she is 95 and goree chitee). It's one of the reasons she liked me right off the bat (cuz of my fair skin) ha!

My MIL is dark skin toned while my FIL is gora chitta. Somehow his mother who clearly has a preference for fair skin still allowed the marriage to take place.

Most of my husband's gora chitta male cousins are married to much darker toned girls. The girls are absolutely beautiful though. Guys and their mother's these days care more about how pretty the girl is rather than her skin color, trust me.

I'm fair and my hubby is med toned. Our daughter is darker like my MIL and I LOVE her caramel skin! I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! :)

[bella88]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

^im afraid it's still very common, even in this day and age. For example, when one of my aunt found out I was going to marry a white guy, first thing she said was 'chalo acha hai, bachay tu goray hongay. thats the first thing she even before inquiring about his faith..

[Knight30]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

@SummerFruits

so (most - not all) Pakistanis are obsessed with being fair whilst most goras are obsessed with achieving a tan colour. Why is no-one happy with what they have. tbh, if someone rejects you because your not 'fair' enough then that really tells you how shallow they are. What if your fair but then your skin colour changes to slightly darker naturally (happened to my grandma). Will the person divorce you? Pakistanis place too much emphasis on fair colours (especially females). a fair colour does not equal fair coloured kids or a happy life lol.

We have this gorgeous black girl that works for our corporation, she is amazingly toned and dresses really nicely, you should see the jaws drop when she walks in. she could literally walk on tounges if she wanted to, why the obsession with skin color. Kind of racist to me.

[Kraft_Dinner]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I was not aware that this thread would get so many posts! I especially agree with certain things that some of you have written (that can actually be applicable to individuals of all skin tones, ethnicities and/or races). For example:

@bella88

its not just desis who dont like their skintone, white people try to tan so much and dont like light skin. i guess no one is happy with what they have. whats even strange is that most gyms here have a tanning section where even guys tan after working out. so as we try to get fairer, they try to get tanner.

@aqsafar

We should be able to love our “wheatish” skin tones, but it won’t change until we change our children’s mindsets and do not allow this idea to penetrate future generations.

@S_and_S

Skin colour seems to be an issue in many cultures, not only ours surprisingly and it’s really sad.

@NaMaan

You can’t force anyone to start liking black or white or brown. It’s an inbuilt thing. I know so many brown/yellow women who like white or black men and same for men. It doesn’t mean they think less of their own same race. It’s personal preference.

@nnabid

it’s a personal preference as to what you like, and it changes with your environment and the people that influence you.

@Deeba1234

What I do have a problem with is only fair skin being considered beautiful..

The only thing that I would change is from the second quote. I would replace: “We should be able to love our “wheatish” skin tones” with “We should be able to love our skin tones,” whatever they may be.

[pinkcookie456]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I would prefer marrying into an entirely different race. Most people I have come across are too shallow. The obsession with a fair complexion is just ridiculous and not to mention close minded.. I have had a few men say blatantly they liked me for my fair complexion and I am thinking WTH is that all what you saw in me?? If I turn to a darker shade which is going to happen as I age I am not desirable anymore. A girl's personality, ethics or brains has no value whatsoever. I personally dont have a "preference" I would rather like a man who can engage in intellectual conversations and is mature

[BombShellBabe]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I think it has to do with preference. Diversity comes in different packages and I don't know where I'd place myself. My ex-bf skin-toned was gora color and my fiancée is gora too while I'm olive...

I would have given preference to tanned man too but I didn't selected him based on skin color.

[BombShellBabe]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I have gotten the fair compliments too... It is really weird in our society because people tend to be shallow about it and pick girls based on skin color. I didn't even approach men who wanted a gori Larki. Compare to Pakistani skin toned, I'm olive and bit fair than most but I would not be considered totally gori. It was surprising to me that people would put me in gori category when I'm not so skin tone is also based on personal evaluation.

I would prefer marrying into an entirely different race. Most people I have come across are too shallow. The obsession with a fair complexion is just ridiculous and not to mention close minded.. I have had a few men say blatantly they liked me for my fair complexion and I am thinking WTH is that all what you saw in me?? If I turn to a darker shade which is going to happen as I age I am not desirable anymore. A girl's personality, ethics or brains has no value whatsoever. I personally dont have a "preference" I would rather like a man who can engage in intellectual conversations and is mature

[Hmmna]

Re: Skin tone and marriage

I do think it is more to get fair skinned grandchildren. It is an insane obsession.