Sitting too close with cousins

[Laiha]

Re: Sitting too close with cousins

@Paheli00

So does your friend get upset every-single-time her husband acts like this with ANY of his female cousins and brings it up?

In my family there are NO cousin marriages. We are taught from birth to treat/view our cousins as a brother/sister. Even now as adults, it is not unusual for a male cousin to sit next to a female cousin (obviously the two bodies aren’t tightly pressed against one another or anything…just two adults sitting next to each other on a couch). It’s also not unusual for us to greet each other by a quick hug and put our arms around one another during family events while taking a picture.

If this guy was hanging out with the cousin and doing these things alone then I can see her issue. But he’s sitting next to his cousin, and putting his arms around her to take a picture while surrounded by other family members…including his wife.

What exactly about this makes your friend uncomfortable? Is it religious reasons? You wrote that her family is more liberal than his family in other aspects so I’m assuming her family does plenty of things that are not 100% Islam approved either. Does she think her husband is really going to do anything sexual with ANY of his cousins?

lol no I said it bugs her every time. I didn’t say that she picks a fight every single time.

mm wife wasn’t at the family wedding where this happened.

I don’t think it’s for religious reasons. It’s more about possessiveness perhaps? Don’t know if that’s the right word. Based on what I’ve been told, her husband used to like his khala’s daughter (way back in college days) then she moved out of country and they lost touch and he moved on. Then there was this other cousin (phuphu’s daughter) who liked him but he thought of her as his baby sister. So clearly, it’s not as simple as he is making it sound that feelings don’t develop between cousins.
They had a love marriage, so it’s not a trust issue. She knows he loves her and takes his marriage seriously. She just doesn’t like other girls touching him, whether it is his cousin sisters or hers. They have had this conversation twice before, so I personally think she is right to be upset if he is still not being considerate enough. In his defense, he isn’t putting his arm around anyone. It was the girls each time. But he didn’t have to sit so close that such an opportunity would present itself repeatedly.